deadspin Page 341 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Meet Your New Editor(s)
We were really hoping that, here on our last day, we'd have the opportunity to announce our successor at this here site. It is our pleasure - after quite a bit of back-and-forth and more qualified applicants that we could have possibly imagined - to say, yes, this here site is going to be in fine ha...

Part XI: Deadspin Hall Of Fame Inductee...Will Leitch
Well, that was fun, wasn't it? I'd like to thank ALL of our roasters for their contributions to today's festivities. I can't think of a better send-off for our man. I'd also like to thank the always brilliant Jim Cooke for designing the above plaque, at last granting Will Leitch permanent immortali...

The Countdown Begins ...
• The Celtics were rather convincing. • The Beijing kids are back. • Well played, Mets, totally. • Oak! • Tiger wins, and then he's done. • Jemele Hill will sit a few plays out. • We thought Drew's column was dead-on this week. • Hank Steinbrenner, visionary. • Lance Armstrong is not always friendly...

She Can't Act, She Can't Sing, She Can't Dance. A Triple Threat.
What's wrong with the way we talk? What's the big idea? Are we dumb or something?...

After The Quake: Penetrating Strangeness
The Olympics begin in August, and they're in China, so, you know, it should be a rather fascinating world event, if you're into fascinating world events. And we are proud to welcome back our Deadspin Beijing Bureau, our own trio of correspondents living in China and reporting on everything they see...

She Wears Glasses, So She Must Be Smart
• Who cares if he doesn't like bloggers? After this, we do love Michael Wilbon. • Rick Sutcliffe is all googly-eyed over Erin Andrews. • A message to the graduates. • Jose Lima's new friend. • Reilly calls Simmons a "blogger." Burn! • Roger Clemens and boners. • El Hombre goes down. • Every...

Are We Gonna Die? Because We Wrote This?
Hello? Is the bathroom on this level working? A dog inside the building! Go! Shoo! Why you're not a dog at all. My god, this is like a moment from a horror movie. This is precisely the moment where the mutation or beast will attempt to kill an unlikable side character. But, in stories where there ha...

A Special Balls Deep Message To The Class Of 2008
This is BALLS DEEP With Drew Magary (Balls® is a registered trademark and has been used with the expressed written consent of AJ Daulerio). It's gonna be like an SI Point After column, only with dick jokes. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," featuring 100 percent all-new material, is available here....

So, Yeah, Active Week
• See ya, Hirshey. • See ya ... what? See ya ... us? • If the Cubs are gonna keep winning, at least this happened. • Uh, yikes. • This guy is the greatest. • Ron Artest, journalist. • Drew, out of the closet. • We're not sure we'd get along with Chuck Bednarik. • Everybody likes that Kimbo Slice cha...

You're Too Much Trouble. Get Some Therapy.
We were a stand-up tomato: a juicy, sexy, beefsteak tomato. Nobody does vegetables like us. We did an evening of vegetables off-Broadway. We did the best tomato, the best cucumber... we did an endive salad that knocked the critics on their ass....

Hitchin' A Ride
• Foul, or not a foul? Doesn't matter now. • Oddsmaker came back! • This car is awesome. • Michael Jackson, UFC fan. • Loving YMCA. • Ryan Howard, a Tractor Traylor heir. • Alfonso Soriano is sensitive. • Back from France. • Scary. • Here comes Reilly! • Borat and heavyweight champs....

We Think People Should Mate For Life, Like Pigeons Or Catholics.
We're older than her father, can you believe that? We're dating a girl, wherein, we can beat up her father....

Perhaps Simmons Should Write A Newspaper Column
• Tony K kisses newspapers goodbye. • Utah fans are scary. • Dee Mirich returns! • Reggie MIller, drinkin' • Hirshey nailed the end of the EPL season. • Barkley and Vegas, two great tastes that taste great together. • Sit a few plays out, big guy. • Thank you, Milwaukee! • When Charles Haley attacks...

Worry Is Like Interest Paid In Advance On A Debt That Never Comes Due
Nobody looks at a Japanese tourist....

Ozzie Guillen And His Inflatable Fans
• Inflatable groupies. • A-Rod, cool under pressure. Totally. • Flomax! • Tim Tebow, a cut above. • A kid that is now somewhat less smelly. • The horse revolution. • Mindy McCready, not selling albums. • Look what two motorcycle crashes can produce. • Jamie Moyer has a friend in baseball schedules. ...

Snakes. Why'd It Have To Be Snakes?
You Americans, you're all the same. Always overdressing for the wrong occasions....

GSTF Tour Returns ... In Milwaukee!
Well, in all the hullabaloo of the last week, we'd almost forgotten: We have a reading in Milwaukee this week! It had slipped past us, what with all the dumbing-down of America....

All Hail Kobe... Except for Shaq
I am interrupting your precious Friday night to bring you some breaking news (if you're reading this on your blackberry's rss prepared to not get laid... again). Kobe Bean Bryant has been declared the Most Valuable Player of the National Basketball Association for the first time in his all-encompa...

Braylon Edwards Does Not, In Fact, Blog
• Hey, What'd we miss? Oh, yeah. That. • Oh, and nobody had a better take than Daulerio. • John Daly, shirtless. • Jeff Reed. Two words, so much meaning. • Careful, Coach Weis. • Pat Jordan is a badass. • Roger Clemens should not be allowed around early teens. Nor should Karl Malone, for that matte...

Show Us All The Blueprints
If you let him testify at that hearing, the whole world will see what he's become. They should remember him for what he was....