deadspin Page 354 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Well, You All Look Familiar
Good morning, campers. I'll be your second substitute teacher of the week while Will's out mourning the passing of James Brown. Now, I'm no Will Leitch, but the good news is that you don't have to get used to a new captain on this ship. I've been around before. I know the lay of the land, and I like...

Tony Romo Cockblocks A Deadspin Commenter
In last month's Deadspin thread discussing the three Thanksgiving NFL games, commenter Wingman said the following:...

Who Works On The Day After Christmas?
If you notice this week that the word "I" makes its appearance where you'd expect to see "we," that's because our friendly editor, Will Leitch, is taking some much-deserved time off. My name is Michael David Smith and I'm the first pinch hitter. If you'd like to know more about me, I write for Foo...

Yzerman Is Our Bitch
So I don't know if you saw this, but... we're kind of a big deal. The latest ESPN the Magazine has Deadspin (well, not really) as the 25th biggest sports story of the year. Not as big as Jason McElwain at #22, but bigger than Steve Yzerman at #26. Sorry, Stevie. That's just the way it goes someti...

Week In Deadspin: That's The News, And We Are Outta Here
• A difficult morning for Dontrelle Willis. • Meet the Crimson Hawk. • Any excuse to use the tag! • This matchup is not as close as we thought it might be. • That's a tough way to be eliminated from the Asian Games. • The best in stretcher-related injuries. • Tony Dungy ... HANDSOME! • Desmond How...

You'll Shoot Your Eye Out
Only one thing in the world could have dragged us away from the soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the window....

We're Going To Wally World!
Someone asked us the other day whether or not our job was stressful. We thought about it for a moment and told them that our job is only stressful when we're not doing it. Doing Deadspin is the most fun thing we do; the only time it stresses us out is when we're away from the computer and terrifie...

Congratulations, Suzy Kolber Kissers
The voting has concluded at the 2006 Weblog Awards, and your winner is will be... Kissing Suzy Kolber, a site that's been mentioned here on Deadspin once or twice. The results haven't been made final or official, and they won't be until Monday. I guess they want some extra time to check for ballot...

Week In Deadspin: Rockin' The Local 138
• We like to listen to John Rocker talk. Jeff Pearlman? Not so much. • Miami-FIU. What could possibly go wrong? • When Joey Porter and Kellen Winslow feud, it's a catfight, MEOW! • Joel Zumaya has BLISTAS ON HIS FINGAS! • Welcome back leather! (And no Berman jokes here!) PETA is not happy. • It's li...

We Always Thought It'd Be Better To Be A Fake Somebody Than A Real Nobody
No matter what you do, no matter how awful ... no one ever thinks that they're a bad person....

Week In Deadspin: The Ballad Of Ron Herpes
• Calling himself "Ron Herpes" probably would have defeated the point. • David Hirshey takes on Bill Simmons. (Kind of.) • ESPN is down with independent films. One might almost call them underground! • Tony LaRussa is ACTING! • You know what's awesome? The BCS! • Ali Rap is bullocks. • USC just ha...

Do We Laugh Now, Or Wait Until It Gets Funny?
We picked you for the job, not because we think you're so damn smart, but because we thought you were a shade less dumb than the rest of the outfit. Guess we were wrong. You're not smarter, Walter. You're just a little taller....

Week In Deadspin: Remember That Romo Is Mexican
• Freddie Mitchell, substitute teacher. Really. • Vote For Rory! • Michael Irvin "apologizes." • The only league left for Justin Gatlin. • Dallas Clark rules all. • Bill Romanowski has some health tips for you. • Scoop Jackson vs. the blogs. • Jimmy Kimmel for new MNF broadcaster. • Melissa Rivers a...

No, YOU'RE Don Francisco's Sister!
Isn't all mankind ultimately executed for a crime it never committed? The difference is that all men go eventually, but we go at six o'clock tomorrow morning. We were supposed to go at five o'clock, but we have a smart lawyer. Got leniency....

Welcome To Deadspin Widescreen
As some of you might have noticed, the design looks a wee bit different around here today; we're doing some tweaking, some minor "redesigning," if you will, and we think it looks quite nice....

Week In Deadspin: See Ya, Larry
• Tony Banks' wife likes to keep him happy. • Gilbert Arenas is a damned genius. • Look out Bobby Bowden: Here comes the eBay! • The Cubs, they spent a lot of money. • Warren Sapp ... poisoned! • David Wright and Jose Reyes, LOOKING HOT! • Bill Simmons made a fantasy basketball trade with Dean Cai...

We're Easy
Y'all take it easy now. This isn't Dallas, it's Nashville! They can't do this to us here in Nashville! Let's show them what we're made of. Come on everybody, sing! Somebody, sing!...

Happy Thanksgiving, Bird Brains
Well, we figure most of you have skipped out of the office for the long weekend, so we figured we might as well do the same; it's off for Thanksgiving for us now. We were considering doing one of those "We're Thankful For ..." stories, that pointed out all the Crazy and Wacky things in the world of ...

Week In Deadspin: So, What's Everybody Up To Tomorrow Afternoon?
• We still can't believe this YWML reference on "Las Vegas" actually happened. • The coolest cheerleader we've seen outside of Tampa bars. • We continue to wait for ESPN Blogs. • No tickets for Nickelback? Come on! • The Lego Ohio Stadium. • Look, an intern! • Jemele Hill debuts at Page 2. • The M...

Excuse Us, You Did Say Your Clock Was Correct?
The mechanism is ... Oh James, James ... will you make love to me all the time in England? Day and night. Go on about the mechanism....