duan Page 164 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Is Probably Not Matt Kemp's Penis
Despite MediaTakeOut trumpeting this as the Dodgers outfielder choking up on his swing, we're dubious. And we've seen some athlete dong in our day....

Step Off, Leibovitz: The Big Unit Is Here To Photograph Rock Stars
That blurry behemoth of a man is future-Hall-of-Famer-turned-amateur-concert-photographer Randy Johnson at Lollapalooza this weekend. He was there to shoot Soundgarden for his own edification because that's what he does now....

Brett Favre's Mom Likes The Story About His Sexting Habits
Here's an odd report from a reader who follows Bonita Favre's Facebook page. Apparently she's not too savvy when it comes to social media tools, or she just gets a kick out of her son's supposed Croc-out-with-his-cock-out habit....

Time for Quote of the Day Nominations
"Shooting 18-over par is not fun," Tiger Woods who, on Sunday, finished with the highest 72-hole score - 298 - of any PGA Tour event he ever played, even as an amateur. [AP]...

Bowlegged Floyd Little Gets to Canton
Jerry Rice and Emmitt Smith (and others) get their yellow jackets tonight. Travesty. What'd either of them ever accomplish?...

Welcome To Deadspin's Music Week
Like our other famed theme weeks which have gone horribly awry, we're attempting to cover some other subject matter that doesn't have anything to do with sports. Or dongs, for that matter. Yes: MUSIC WEEK is upon us....

Yankees Little League Coach Was Chock Full Of Steroids For Brawl
Do you remember Jason Chighizola, who sucker punched the coach of his little league rival Red Sox? Turns out he had nearly 15 times the amount of testosterone necessary to be considered legally doping....

Your Brett Favre Cock Story Backlash Roundup
Welcome back to the heaving underbelly of the internet. That incessant hum you hear is because some people are all atwitter about the ethics and legitimacy of a post on this site. Read and enjoy....

Hilariously Gross Brett Favre News To Surface Soon
And it has nothing to do with his alleged retirement this time around. No, no — it turns out the heroic Gunslinger of yore has a little scoundrel in him, too. But you must wait, mongrels....

Phillie Phanatic Immortalized As Art, Promptly Vandalized
Not all of Philadelphia has Phillies Phever. Two men were arrested for assaulting a 6-foot, 100-lb sculpture of the Phanatic. His prehensile tongue offered pathetically little defense....

How Tampa Bay Shenanigans Affected the Trade Deadline
Oh, those pesky Hickeys. Seems as if Tampa Bay pitching coach Jim Hickey was involved in some horseplay — specifically, "wrestling, in a way" — which landed pitcher Grant Balfour on the 4-to-6-week shelf with a left rib strain....

Who Would You Have Signed: S.J. or T.O.?
That was S.J. Green of the Montreal Alouettes....

Lovable Psychic Octopus To Be Exploited Further
Paul the Octopus—prognosticating scamp and cephalopod—won our hearts during the World Cup. His ability to pick mussels has landed him a print advertising campaign for a supermarket chain. The ad, pictured, roughly translates to "Where they buy today? Good decision."...

When Mutton Bustin' Goes Horribly Wrong
Derekscott "Bubba" Kirby is like all small children in the Southwest: he's a mutton buster. However, unlike most mutton busters, little Derekscott is infected with E. coli....

Deadspin I-Team: The Case Of Matthew Berry's Friend Hooking Up With An Oscar-Winning Actress
I-Team: Assemble! Today's mystery revolves around The Talented Mr. Roto's adventures In Hollywoodland. Turns out one of Matthew Berry's friends pulled a much better-looking woman than Berry thought possible, and Berry is keeping the details in a lock box....

Mite Fight Broken Up By Mommy
These small children — teammates — get into it with a shove and a slash, and one drops the gloves, ready to go. That's when young JJ's mother plays enforcer....

Seth Tommeraasen Asks "Does Deadspin Cover Flugtag?"
... And Brian Hickey answers, "You bet your ass Deadspin covers flugtag. Lookie here."...

The Starbury Rises in the East
I have no idea what these commentators are saying about Vice Admiral Starbury X. Marbury's MVP performance for the Chinese Basketball Association East All-Star Team, but Stephon surely does. Stephon always did....

Red Sox Fan Picking His Nose? Red Sox Fan Picking His Nose.
Going with the same headline formula? Going with the same headline formula. You fuck. It is the end of the day, the end of the week, but not the end of your life, so go rejoice....

Mutton-Almost-Bustin' At The Tour De France
Alberto Contador came 108 miles closer to winning his third Tour, no thanks to a bunch of of sheep who came out of fucking nowhere to dart across the road in front of the peloton....