duan Page 165 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Lakers-Celtics Continue NBA Finals Quest To Hang Another Colorful Bed Sheet From Their Rafters
The other major sporting event free of the incessant buzz of the vuvuzela in The Garden. Prepare for action shots of Maria Menounos attempting to trip Lamar Odom. [Image courtesy the brilliant Mocksession.com]...
ESPN Gives Clint Dempsey Unfortunate Nickname
So that was fun, huh? The U.S. played to a draw today thanks in large part to Robert Green's colossal cock-up. Green is expected to be Temple of Doom'd by Capello later this evening. Next up: Slovenia, lower TV ratings....
Asshole Kids Try Their Best To Ruin Blackhawks Victory Parade
Reader Paul attended today's Blackhawks victory parade in downtown Chicago. Instead of seeing Patrick Kane get nice and toasty, he saw asshole teenagers doing what asshole teenagers do best: be asshole teenagers. His story, a video, and more photos after the jump....
Reminder: Tips Are Highly Encouraged, Gentle Friends
This is a gentle nudge to remind you, brave internet lurkers, that your tips are welcome at all times. From the poignant, to the mundane, to the ridiculous, we will do our best to use them in some capacity....
Your Marco Scutaro Summer Jam Is Here
"Scuscuscutaro" has dropped and, as far as Phil Collins song parodies about journeymen shortstops go, it's excellent — streets ahead of that Pavement album about Jeff Hornacek. H/T BullfightsOnAcid....
Stephen Strasburg: Let Them Know It's Strasmas Time
The Washington Nationals' Band-Aid, Stephen Strasburg, makes his Major League debut tonight against the anemic Pittsburgh Pirates. He's expected to throw three no-hitters, hit five home runs, and save numerous cats from numerous trees....
And Now Your Zen-Like Moment From Will Leitch's Wedding Weekend
This horrifying exhibition of dance moves to "Cupid Shuffle" was perpetrated by Emeritus at his post-rehearsal dinner fete and not at Blogs With Balls. Even the whitest of rhythmless white people might find this unsettling....
Two Leagues, Two Titles, Two Games-One Time
It all begins at the same time. 8:00pm....
This Is What Happens When There Are No Playoffs On Saturday
Big thanks to both the NHL and NBA for providing zero entertainment today. I'd much rather flip between two Finals games on Sunday night then enjoy each one separately during the other 44 hours of the weekend when nothing happened....
Blood Writes: I Bumped Into A Banana Crate
One of Deadspin's own has a gruesome tale to tell. This is the time that I bumped my leg at the bodega the other night....
Soccer-Playing Penguins Adorable, Terrible At Soccer
An aquarium in South Korea — aka Good Korea — is preparing for the World Cup by dressing up its penguins and making them play soccer. Different cultures are hilarious....
Cover-Band Drummer Is Far Too Intense For A Cover-Band Drummer
Click to view If there's one thing more embarrassing than being in a cover band that wears matching gold blazers, it's being the overly intense drummer for a cover band that wears matching gold blazers. Sharp-dressed men, indeed. H/T Brad....
Pittsburgh Seeks Brave, Able-Bodied Young People For Controlled Toilet Flushing
Are you over 18 and a fan of coordinated, group activities? The Pittsburgh Penguins would like 250 "students" to flush all the toilets at the newly constructed Consol Energy Center. In other news, Western Pennsylvania now runs on toilet news....
Chicago Faces Epidemic Of Jersey-Wearing Statues
It is official: Chicago is a hockey town. If the Michael Jordan statue is wearing Hawks threads, it's only a matter of time before Mayor Daley is mispronouncing players' names and crudely dyeing the city's fountain waters red. Oh wait....
Where Not To Go This Vacation Season
SeaWorld has two pregnant Orcas; both carrying the children of Tilikum, who put the killer in Killer Whale....
Next Week Is Deadspin's Inaugural Blood Week: Submit A Story, Please
Yes, it's time for another go at a theme week for this site. Starting Tuesday, we'll be talking about all things bloody in sports, culminating with Pat Jordan driving out to Los Angeles to punch Sarah Silverman....
Oh. Bye.
Have a good vampirey weekend everybody. I'll be back tomorrow dicking around because everyone else deserves a day off. Including you. So stop by only if necessary. And God bless The Starter Wife....
Mariners Fan Loses Bet, Dignity
Last weekend, the Padres and Mariners faced off at Safeco Field. San Diego took two of three, and one fellow on the wrong end of a bet produced this oddly whisper-filled love letter to the Padres. H/T Theodore Donald Kerabatsos....
Yankees Fans Pull Ahead In Basebrawl Standings
Ah, spring. When a young man's fancy turns to getting loaded and fighting other young men at a sporting event. This video, taken at a recent Rays-Yankees game covers all the hits: a brief brawl, people shouting "YouTube," and finger-pointing galore....
Aural Secs: David Ortiz's 30-Second Tater Trot Explained With Music
In honor of David Ortiz's Roger Bannister moment last night, an Aural Secs is in order. Unlike frequent Aural Secs subject Usain Bolt, Ortiz is quite slow, so we're going with the final chord in "A Day In The Life."...