germany Page 10 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Tongan Olympic Luger Who Turned Out To Be An Underwear Marketing Scam
Imagine if the events surrounding 1988 Jamaican bobsled team that inspired the film Cool Runnings happened today, in the age of the internet and 24-hour sports coverage. Now imagine one of those athletes, by pure chance, had been named Calvin Klein. And after his emergence on the international scene...

The "Respect United" Soccer Tournament Was Canceled After Fans Brawled With Riot Police
Fans of the German indoor soccer team St. Pauli—perhaps after imbibing too many of a beverage hawked by local Fräuleins—brawled with spectators and Hamburg police, bringing a premature end to the Schweinske Cup tournament....

Homemade Hockey Pads Offer Little Protection, It Turns Out
For a German TV show, the two hosts planned to strap on their homemade armor and face the wrath of a full-ice body check at intermission of a Eisbären Berlin game. After seeing what happened to the first test subject, the second host decided that one was enough....

These German Soccer Fans Were Thrown Out Of A Stadium For Having Sex In The Stands (Twice)
Scoreless soccer games can be terribly boring. Like any long car ride, though, there are distractions for the monotony: songs, chants, popcorn, beer, "the wave"—and also, sex in public....

Watch The Goal That Clinched Japan's Remarkable Upset Of Germany In The Women's World Cup
Germany was hoping to win its third consecutive Women's World Cup and had home-pitch advantage to do so. Alas, Karina Maruyama of Japan's extra-time goal in the 108th minute relegated them to also-ran status. Japan advances to the World Cup semifinals, where they'll face the winner of tomorrow's S...

Women Of The German National Soccer Team Endeavor To Show They Are Not "Butch" By Posing For <i>Playboy</i>
This may or may not be a good thing for women's sports:...

German Newspaper Credits Dirk, "First White MVP Since Larry Bird," With Defeating "Ghetto Basketball"
We regret to be working in translation here, because this piece, from Die Welt's Peter Schilling, might just be more objectionable in German. Here's the translated version, working from this original....

German Women Adept At Milking Cows, Plowing Fields Vie For Calendar-Modeling Gig
Two hundred women applied but just 25 made the first cut. From there, the Hamburg Chamber of Trade will whittle down the list to determine who has what it takes to represent not only a nation, but a way of life, in the 2012 German Farm Girls Calendar....

Punch-Out With Your Cock Out
A German (of course) AIDS awareness organization has released COCK OUT, in which players slip on a motion-sensing digital condom and use their thrusts to pummel a virtual HIV....

Thunderous Dunk Uses Opponent's Chest As A Springboard
Best we can tell, this is from the third level of the German pro basketball system, and that's University of Dayton grad Marcus Johnson going all Tom Chambers on some poor schmo. All 35 fans were thrilled....

Today In Neo-Nazi Youth Sports News...
Any story that describes its protagonist and/or antagonist as a "52-year-old who sports an Adolf Hitler-style moustache and a mullet" and "master chimney sweep," but isn't about pre-haircut Bill Cowher, is worthy of closer inspection....

Lady Footballer In Humiliating Handball Mix Up!
As embarrassing mistakes go, this one is up there with accidentally calling your teacher "Mummy", or unknowingly leaving your flies open during a bumpy bus journey....

Germany Being Overrun By Radioactive Boars
Twenty-five years after Chernobyl, German scientists are finding that more and more of the country's skyrocketing boar population is radioactive. The Russian payback for WWII will never end. [Der Spiegel, via]...

World Cup Open Thread: Uruguay-Germany
The battle for bronze is here. Can Uruguay salvage a modicum of dignity for South America—and alternately taunt Brazil and Argentina—or will Ze Germans prove too, too hot to handle? Stay in the know and comment along....

World Cup Open Thread: Germany-Spain
Many are calling this "the real championship game" or something along those lines. I don't know though. Germany's been dominant (save that troublesome loss to Serbia) while Spain has looked ... lucky? Competent? Which side wins out? Comment as you watch, please....

Psychic Octopus Predicts Spain, But It's A FRAUD!
Paul the octopus is 5-0 in picking winners in Germany's matches, and the world has been waiting for his semifinal selection. Unfortunately, there's tomfoolery afoot....

World Cup Open Thread: Germany-Argentina
This one could be a classic. The Germans have exploded for four goals twice already, and Argentina might be the most talented squad around. Talk about it....

Sea Creatures, Soccer Powers Battle For Supremacy
Paul, the Berlin octopus has correctly predicted every German match so far, and he's picking them over Argentina. Sayco, the Argentine dolphin, thinks otherwise. Gentlemen, choose your slimy undersea prognosticators....

Germany Won The Battle, But Their Manager Is Revolting
Yes, England were outclassed on the pitch. But off it, not so much. Joachim Low thought he might get away with a quick "pick your nose and eat it", but, well, he didn't....

Germany Explodes In Orgy Of Vuvuzela Violence
First a man pummels a police officer with a vuvuzela. Then a US Army employee stationed in Germany threatens to kill his neighbors with an ax if they don't stop blowing those damn horns. Something's got to give....