Germany Page 9 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Germany-Brazil Was The Most-Tweeted Sporting Event In History
If you are reading this, you probably watched and wondered at Germany's 7-1 brutalizing of Brazil. And there's a good chance you tweeted about it, because it was one of the most stunning outcomes sports has ever seen. If so, you're a little part of history....
Visualized: Every Shot From Germany's Dominant First Half Over Brazil
This, from The New York Times's live coverage of Germany's 7-1 drubbing of Brazil yesterday, is just the saddest. It only tracks the first half, but that's where all the damage was done. The Germans scored five goals on 10 shots, nine of which were on target, while Brazil bookended the half with two...
Luiz Felipe Scolari Falls On His Sword
There's something about a mollywhomping that turns losers philosophical. As if there's no place to hide, no excuses that can possibly be made, and the only way to salvage some dignity is to humble yourself before a world already inclined to be sympathetic. After Brazil's 7-1 defeat at the hands of G...
Germany-Brazil, Summarized By A Roomba
This might be my favorite recap of the Germany-Brazil match. Brazil were so awful, a damn Roomba clowned them on Instagram....
Germany Ruin Brazil In World Cup; People Make Holocaust Jokes
Germany routed Brazil, 7-1 in today's World Cup semifinal. Many were sad. Others saw the opportunity for Holocaust jokes....
Germany Smashed Brazil So Hard It's Good For America
Germany became the first team to score five goals in the first 29 minutes of any World Cup game in history. It ended 7-1, but if we can summon just a touch more jingoistic national sentiment, we say fuck it, cheer for the Germans. They scrubbed America off the wrong side of the record book. ...
Meanwhile, In Germany...
That is the image that links to German paper Bild's liveblog of today's 5-0 dismantling of Brazil. All you need to know is that Tor means goal in German to get that the Germans seem to be handling this a little better than the Brazilians....
Brazil Fans Are Losing Their Minds
Here's the staff at the Youth With A Mission nonprofit in Saint-Marc, Haiti, reacting to the fourth of five Germany goals in the first half. They appear to be Brazil supporters. Anger is a legitimate alternative to sadness. ...
Wrestling Legend "J.R." Jim Ross Calling The Brazil-Germany Highlights
How do you improve upon the highlights from Germany's 7-1 thrashing of Brazil? By adding wrestling legend Jim Ross to the goal calls, that's how. [Updated with the second half goals.]...
All Of Brazil Is Crying Right Now
Literally. All of it....
Your Brazil-Germany Open Thread
Well, it's already 1-0, Germany, but it's still early. Talk about it here....
Germany Have A 5-0 Lead Over Brazil
Germany are fucking up Brazil faster than we can update right now. Right now, currently, it's 5-0 after 30 minutes....
Why Wounded Brazil Are Still Favorites Against Germany
[Update: Nah.]...
Will Germany's Misuse Of Their Best Player Doom Them This World Cup?
Joachim Löw knew something needed to change. ...
Germany Get To Fourth Straight Semifinal After Drab 1-0 Win Over France
Well, that was anticlimactic. After a tournament with so much excitement, attacking play, and goals galore, Germany beat France 1-0 in a fairly mundane quarterfinal to reach their fourth straight World Cup semifinal....
That's Not How You Soccer, Miroslav Klose
[Germany's Miroslav Klose takes a ball to the face during today's 1-0 win over France. Klose, who has 15 goals in his World Cup career, was subbed out in the 69th minute, keeping him tied with Ronaldo until Germany's next match. Photo: Clive Rose/Getty Images Sport]...
The World Cup Teaches Germans How To Be Proud Of Germany
If you know anything about German soccer, even if you're a not a hardcore fan and only pay attention when the World Cup steams into town every four years and blows its piercing, un-ignorable whistle, I'm pretty sure you're familiar with the following narrative. It comes from the 2006 World Cup, whic...
Every Country We Played Trolled Us With "Yes We Can!"
The Belgians had faith in their boys coming into today's Round of 16 match against the USMNT. Following the tradition of every other team we've played in this World Cup, one paper thought it would be funny to turn the famous Obama campaign slogan "Yes we can!" against us. They were right. They could...
