go Page 697 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Mississippi State Recruit Bodyslams Math Teacher Onto Unemployment Line
Click to view Here's video of Jamerson Love, a cornerback for Aberdeen High School, wrestling now-former algebra teacher Shobul Johnson. Allegedly, Johnson asked his students to "black out the windows" and "move the furniture" before commencing to rumble. Then he got his asymptote kicked. [Rivals]...
And Now A Photo Of Evan Longoria's Penis. Allegedly.
Those Beantown rapscallions at Barstool Sports have posted a photo of what one woman claims is the Rays' third baseman's prodigious bologna hammer. If you choose to click, remember that the safety of your workplace may be in peril. PENISPHOTO....
Weekend Winner: The Chicago Blackhawks' Bandwagon
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the newest fans of the Stanley Cup finals-bound Blackhawks. They must feel really good about dropping $150 on that Patrick Kane jersey in the UC giftshop....
Maradona's Pot To Piss In Now Classy As All Get-Out
The Argentine boss demanded the standard toilets in his South Africa suite be replaced with two of "The World's Best Toilet Seat," just $449.95. Why two? One for the cocaine, obviously. [Daily Mail]...
Reports: Elin Wants Divorce, Shit-Ton Of Money
Elin's rumored $750 million demand sounds exorbitant, until you divide it by his 20 women, and remember many celebrities have paid much more per affair. If true, Nordegren would vault to No. 2 on the tour money list. [NYDN]...
Basebrawl Season Is In Full Swing
Thursday's Angels-White Sox game at U.S. Cellular Field featured two things you often see on the South Side these days: a White Sox loss, and a bunch of White Sox fans beating the shit out of each other. H/T BullFightsOnAcid...
And Suddenly, The Blackhawks Aren't So Likable
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Bullfight Goes Horribly Right, For Bull: Parte Dos (Video)
You saw the picture, now see the video of Julio Aparicio's painful-even-to-describe goring. Shot in the "back-and-to-the-left"-style of the early '90s, this video is equally as excruciating to sit through....
Bullfight Goes Horribly Right, For Bull
Reader Dave sends along this picture of renowned matador Julio Aparicio. Yes, that bull's horn is doing exactly what it looks like it's doing....
Last Night's Winner: The Rest Of The NFC North
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Tarvaris Jackson's chances of starting, which look pretty bright since Brett Favre has hitched his latest comeback to the hopes of a long-shot college baseball team....
And On The Eighth Day, God Ejected Lasorda
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Watch An Intern Talk About Kobe Bryant On CNN
For some reason, CNN asked me for an interview after all that Kobe Bryant photo-shoot business and the Photoshopping you all did. Here it is. I am at your mercy. At least the CNN folks let me wear a shirt. [CNN.com]...
"Tall Pitcher and Short Stop." This Fall On NBC!
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
What To Do With Hanley Ramirez?
Ramirez embarrassed his team by jogging after a ball. His manager returned the favor, benching him immediately thereafter. Ramirez spouted off to the press about it. We've got a problem here that can't be fixed by the usual news cycle....
Paraguayan Soccer Player Rockets In 45-Yard Free Kick
For anyone not satiated by the Lionel Messi goalapalooza from earlier, here is another goal video from a funnily named player in a sports league in a country with which you're vaguely familiar. Somebody buy that man a Baviera. [Goal.com]...
Messi Scores 47 Goals…And Here’s ALL Of Them!
And so Lionel Messi equaled a scoring record — held also by hamster-faced Ronaldo — by helping himself to another couple in yesterday's match. The internet beavers have since been working away, and above is some proof of their toil....
Visanthe Shiancoe Wants To Show The World He's More Than Just A Wagging Dong
Yahoo!'s Michael Silver does a double entendre-filled profile on Vikings' tight end Visanthe Shiancoe, who's working hard to overcome his internet long-comings....
Cleveland Luminaries Join Forces To Win LeBron's Heart Through Terrible Song (CARL MONDAY UPDATE)
UPDATE: Yeah, that's Carl Monday at the 1:57 mark....
Man Saves Beached Whale While Golfing, Avoids Obvious <i>Seinfeld</i> Quotes (UPDATE)
A golfer at Lighthouse Sound Golf Course in Maryland briefly interrupted his round to jump into the ocean and save a whale that was stranded. Unfortunately, that's a two-stroke penalty. (Sad update: The whale didn't survive.) [Independent Press]...