good Page 45 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Wiffle Ball Player Invents New Way To Rob A Home Run
Here’s some shit you might not know: serious wiffle ball players are secretly America’s greatest athletes. If you don’t believe me, just go ahead and start the video above....

Tom Brady Looks Like He's Melting In His Courtroom Sketch
Judge Richard Berman held a hearing in New York Federal Court today for Tom Brady’s civil case against Roger Goodell and the NFL, and Berman did his best to move the process along as both sides’ legal teams took shots at each other, but the best part of the whole event was the courtroom sketch of Br...

Sean Price, RIP: In Praise Of The Brokest Rapper You Know
If Sean Price’s rap career had ended in 1996—if his only contribution to the genre was that year’s ingenious Nocturnal, the debut album from his duo Heltah Skeltah—he would still be worthy of the respect, admiration, and mourning that has poured forth since the announcement of his sudden death this ...

Roger Goodell On Why NFL Didn't Correct ESPN's Ballghazi Report: Uhhh
NFL commissioner Roger Goodell held a press conference in Chicago today to announce the 2016 NFL Draft’s return to the city, and while he was taking questions, the Boston Globe’s Ben Volin took the chance to ask why the league didn’t correct Chris Mortensen’s “11 of 12 footballs” report when Ted Wel...

New York Red Bulls Fans Drop Sick Burn On NYCFC And The Rest Of MLS
Kinda hard to argue when Pirlo’s playing like this:...

Richie Incognito Blasts NFL's Handling Of Misconduct Investigations
After missing an entire NFL season because of reasons that totally weren’t collusion among NFL owners, Richie Incognito is back. He is in training camp with the Bills, and last week was named the starting left guard by Rex Ryan. ...

We'll All Go Down Together: Billy Joel Says Goodbye To Nassau Coliseum
It’s a little after six on a sultry Tuesday evening, and the Champions sports bar nestled inside the Long Island Marriott is packed with an unusual crowd. The walls are lined with memorabilia from the New York Islanders, who up until a few days ago called the crumbling Nassau Coliseum next door home...

Roger Goodell Yuks It Up Over Ballghazi
You could do worse than picking your friends by their laughs. Not that someone’s laugh reveals whether they’re a good person or a bad person, but it’s a pretty great indicator of if you’d enjoy spending time with them. A good laugh is lovely and musical. An annoying laugh pries open your skull and g...

Adios, Sucker: A Conservative Bids A Mostly Fond Adieu To Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart’s last episode of The Daily Show is tonight, and everyone promises to miss him, even if, like me, they stopped watching him religiously years ago. It wasn’t too long after he made his mawkish 2004 plea to Tucker Carlson and Paul Begala to “stop hurting America”—and, as a result, became t...

The NFL Would Like To Have A Little Talk With You About Sex
Does the NFL give its players sex advice? Of course it does! This is a league that tells its players how to tuck in their uniforms, has an approximately 600-word definition of what a catch is, and has its employees sign an “integrity of the game” honor code. So why not give its players The Talk?...

The NFL's Dumbass Deflategate Science Report Is A Feature, Not A Bug
Last night, a mountain of documents and transcription emerged from Tom Brady’s late June appeal hearing before Roger Goodell. It’s been a circus, with a series of insults, emails, and sneaker requests to Tom Ford pouring out of the file cabinet, but the testimony most relevant to the case circles ba...

The Full Story Of Tom Brady's Destroyed Cell Phone
The biggest revelation from Roger Goodell’s decision upholding Tom Brady’s four-game suspension was that Brady’s cell phone was destroyed shortly before meeting with Ted Wells and his investigators, even though he knew Wells wanted access to the contents of his text messages. Here is how Wells descr...

Here's The "Integrity Of The Game" Honor Code The NFL Says Brady Broke
For the first time—as far as we can tell—the NFL’s secret honor oath has become public, as part of the NFLPA’s lawsuit over Tom Brady’s suspension. It’s this “Integrity Of The Game Certification” upon which the NFL has hinged its four-game ban on the Patriots quarterback, and yet the text of this ho...

Michael Jordan Victimized By Meme-Wielding Teen
While giving a speech to a gym full of kids at a youth camp, Michael Jordan encountered every 52-year-old man’s nightmare scenario: a teen with a deep understanding of internet memes....

How The Dodgers Got Baseball's Last Buried Treasure
The following is excerpted from The Best Team Money Can Buy: The Los Angeles Dodgers’ Wild Struggle to Build a Baseball Powerhouse. ...

Tom Brady Lied And Killed Babies With His Lies
It’s the day after the NFL’s bombshell revelation—all revelations must be BOMBSHELL—that Tom Brady destroyed his cell phone before NFL investigators could get their hands on it and use it to expose his plots. But he destroyed more than just his cell phone that day, fair reader … HE DESTROYED OUR NAT...

Taste Roger Goodell's Wrath With Our NFL Punishment Generator
NFL commissioner Roger Goodell is a ruddy incompetent who draws out decisions on punishing league employees in order to soak up the most positive attention he can. Until now, fans have only been to take part in this experience as third parties. Thanks to the NFL Punishment Generator, though, you too...

Here Are 20 Sentences From Roger Goodell's Tom Brady Decision
The NFL has issued a stirring 20-page decision on the issue of New England quarterback Tom Brady’s four-game suspension. In it, Roger Goodell makes the case for upholding his own decision by citing evidence gathered by the NFL’s investigatory arm and a nominally independent law firm. It reads about ...

NFLPA Calls Tom Brady's Upheld Suspension "Outrageous," Will Appeal
The NFLPA has released its reaction to Roger Goodell’s decision to uphold Tom Brady’s four-game suspension. The association plans to appeal, and Brady has reportedly given the go-ahead to appeal in federal court....

Report: "Influential" NFL Owners Pushing For Full Tom Brady Suspension
Roger Goodell is expected to hand down a decision on Tom Brady’s Ballghazi appeal any day now. (Whichever day it comes, it will almost certainly be announced at 5:30 p.m.) Here’s a Pro Football Talk report that claims Brady’s camp and the NFL have held talks on a potential settlement that would take...