how-to Page 15 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Guide For Sports Fans (And Would-Be Plutocrats) To Doing Your Taxes
Those of you who are not Darryl Strawberry will be spending the next few days on your tax returns. Here are a few practical things—and a number of not-so-practical things—that every sports fan should know about his or her taxes. ...
What Happens When A 35-Year-Old Man Retakes The SAT?
I took the SAT a grand total of one time when I was in dipshit prep school. This was 1993. Like any other kid, I wanted to do well on the test, primarily so that I would NEVER have to take it again, but also because kids at my school were real dicks about their SAT scores. You'd hear through the gra...
9 Things I Learned In The Parent Encouragement Program, AKA Shitty Parents Anonymous
The Parent Encouragement Program is a series of classes and workshops that are available to parents living in the D.C. area. The introductory class is free, and so I went a couple of weeks ago, because it didn't cost anything and because I need all the help I can get. The title of the workshop was "...
Your Viewing Guide To The 2011 MLB Playoffs
It's October (almost)! And you know what that means: everyone you know will now pretend to have cared about baseball for the past six months so that they can safely pretend to care about it for the next month. Prepare yourself for those unendurable office talks with the guy who just learned that the...
There Is An NBA GM Out There Who Doesn't Know How To Use Google
Ever wonder if the men who run our professional basketball teams are as clueless as the men who were running our professional baseball teams (as depicted by Michael Lewis in his 2003 book Moneyball)? There is no definitive answer to that question, yet, but we do now know that at least one NBA GM doe...
A Drunk's Guide To Watching Rugby
Chris Benz and Dave Shireley will be filing dispatches from the Rugby World Cup in New Zealand, in the odd moments that they are sober. For a rugby glossary and position guide, click here....
An Instructional Video On How To Pretend To Hit A Forehand Like Rafael Nadal
This is cool, if you're a tennis player/fan, or just a fellow lefty who believes in the general supremacy of lefties. Rafael Nadal hits his forehand with an average topspin of 3,200 RPMs, which is more than any human to ever play the game of tennis. The New York Times explains how he does it. [NYT]...
The Officeworker’s Viewing Guide To The U.S. Open
There is no excuse for anyone to miss a single serve of tennis or a single Sasha Vujacic hair toss at the U.S. Open this year, unless he or she is employed, disinterested, or has basic life responsibilities that might keep one from watching every hour of a two-week long sporting event. But! Just in ...
How To Throw A Knuckleball, Starring Jim Bouton
This is the first of an occasional video series in which someone good at something doable teaches you how to do it. Today we have Jim Bouton, former major leaguer and author of the great Ball Four, demonstrating his old signature pitch, the knuckleball....
How To Identify Satanic Sacrifice: A Helpful, Creepy Police Training Video
This old police training video teaches up-and-coming detectives how to look for signs that their murder victim has been sacrificed to Satan. One such clue: often "a penis is placed inside the mouth of the deceased person." Good to know. [Metal Insider]...
How To Make Your Own Four Loko
The FDA is going to ban caffeinated malt liquor beverages very soon. Gone will be Joose and gone will be our precious, disgusting Four Loko. Luckily, you will be prepared for the 21st century prohibition with this helpful video....
Colin Cowherd's Asinine John Wall Rant, With Video Accompaniment
On Tuesday, John Wall played his first home game as a Washington Wizard. During his introduction, he came out to "Teach Me How To Dougie" and performed the accompanying dance. Colin Cowherd was less than thrilled because Colin Cowherd is an asshole....
Deadspin Classic: How To Tap A Fucking Keg
For Spring Break, The Awl contributor Abe Sauer taught you how to get at that delicious, delicious beer. Well, you're not a college student now; you're a man, and you have friends and family to keep hydrated this holiday weekend....
How To Change A Fucking Diaper
In honor of Mother's Day, and with a nod to The Awl, here is your belligerent guide to changing a kid's filth-laden diaper. You're welcome, assholes....
How To Tap A Fucking Keg
We asked Awl contributor Abe Sauer to write a profanity-filled, Spring Break-themed servicey piece, one that could be useful for both dopey sun-poisoned college kids and backyard BBQ enthusiasts. The Awl agreed to let us borrow its occasional series. Enjoy....
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
Newcastle Owner Now Slightly Richer
Newcastle have been on quite a run as of late, and Mike Ashley is taking full advantage. The club's billionaire owner recently strolled into his local casino (note to self: move to England) and had a seat at the roulette wheel, the greatest table game of them all. Ashley decided to make the boldest ...
Just Another 16-Hour Workday For Herbie
I may have been the last person to notice that ESPN College GameDay dreamboat staple Kirk Herbstreit has also been in the booth for that night's ABC prime-time football game. Oftentimes, those two locales are in different areas. But I think yesterday's cross-country trek had to be one a logistical n...
Gilbert Arenas Wants To Help Your Love Life
During a moment of boredom last week, we caught an episode of that "Tell Me That You Love Me" show on HBO On Demand. We think it might be the most annoying television show we've ever seen. Basically, it's just a bunch of rich white people complaining about How We Just Don't Communicate The Way We Us...