i Page 8049 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
For Your Sunday Afternoon Viewing Pleasure...
Here's your NFL Scoreboard......
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 4
You know what an older gentleman, sensitive to the slow deterioration of his once-strong body, wants above all else? Wall-to-wall national coverage of his case of the shits. Thanks, ABC. - Tuffy Rhodes...
To Watch Tonight...
• College Football: Notre Dame @ Michigan State. This game's so big, they didn't even know what network to put it on. 8:00, ABC. Or ESPN2. • College Football: Kentucky @ Florida. Since when does Kentucky get the ESPN primetime game? They know this isn't basketball, right? 7:45, ESPN. • MLS: Red Bull...
Johnny Damon, Grabbing Himself And Having Sex
Johnny Damon beats off in centerfield. At least, I think that's what she's saying. And you know, she doesn't seem repulsed by the idea... not enough to follow Damon home and mess with his war veteran father, anyway....
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 3
• Does anyone else hear "Please like me! I fit in!" over and over again when Linda Cohn does football highlights? - Derek, Pittsburgh...
LeftoverDome...
• The mayor of Cincinnati is just begging to have his ass kicked. [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette] • A first-hand account of the Orioles protest, with pictures. [The Loss Column] • A Cubs fan, openly salivating over Joe Girardi. [Foul Balls] • This guy really hates HBO's Inside the NFL. And he likes Scarle...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 2
The sideline reporter at the Georgia-CU game just said that Ugga, Georgia's mascot, is "built for pleasure, not speed". Yikes. - Hotwingz0...
Today In The Premiership...
• Man City 2-0 West Ham. Crazy things can happen when you let a Greek guy run wild in "Man City." Georgios Samaras, the Greek national in whom City invested heavily, finally came through with a big performance today. Samaras scored twice against West Ham, busting City out of a bit of a slump....
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 1
• I just woke up to find that apparently last night I texted my ex-girlfriend in French... I don't speak French. You think thats a bad omen for the Vols? - Mikel, Lexington, KY...
We Suck At Everything, Apparently
I realize that golf isn't that big of a deal here at Deadspin, unless Tiger Woods is whiffing on an awkward high-five, or Phil Mickelson is choking away a tournament on the 72nd hole. But the Ryder Cup is one of the few events in sports when the competitors involved care about the outcome as much as...
Does This Mean Jay-Z Has To Rename His Club?
Forty. Forty. Forty. There was a time in the not-too-distant past when seeing that word three times in a row would mean that I had 120 ounces of this garbage coursing through my veins. Today, however, it represents the remarkable accomplishment of Alfonso Soriano, becoming the first ever member of t...
For Your Saturday Afternoon Viewing Pleasure...
The Hugh Johnson Project remains alive, kicking, and looking forward to your contributions. The AOL Instant Messenger name is "DeadspinFootball." Or e-mail [email protected]. As always, don't forget to let me know how you want to be credited (your name, your site, a link, etc). And I apologize if I...
About Last Night...
• MLB: Pirates 2, Padres 6. It should be illegal, actually against the law, for Joe freaking Randa to break up a no-hitter. Just a travesty. • College Football: Northwestern 21, Nevada 31. The Big Ten's reputation continues to grow. • MLB: San Francisco 12, Milwaukee 13. Six RBIs for Barry Bonds. He...
Week In Deadspin: How Much Are Tickets At RFK Again?
• A brother's remembrances. • Football can be extremely violent, and if you're not careful, you'll —- HUGH! • We knew the beer at RFK Stadium was bad, but this is ridiculous. • It's probably not a good idea, in general, to be Joey Porter's neighbor. • Whatever it takes to fire Americans up about t...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you realize that playing against Teen Wolf is more dangerous than it used to be ... • College football: Northwestern at Nevada. After the game, please enjoy our legal brothels! [ESPN2] • MLB: St. Louis at Houston. Adam Wainwright, the new Bobby Jenks. Sure. [ESPN] • Prep football: O...
That, Friends, Is A Lot Of Funk
In a world of uncertainty, the dancing fat man is a distinct pleasure worth cherishing. Do not underestimate the dancing fat Clemson fan: He's, in fact, quite nimble. You might think it cheap and/or easy, but we value the fundamental certainty of gyrating flab, and we think you probably should too....
Leftovers: Maurice's "Profile"
• Unfortunately, this is what Maurice Clarett's trading card looks like now. [Ohio Department Of Rehabilitation And Correction] • Etan Thomas fires back at right-wing Washington columnist who accused him of having a poor work ethic. Unfortunately, he doesn't do it through poetry. [Wizards Front Offi...
Jason Whitlock Leaves ESPN With Guns Ablaze
Now that columnist Jason Whitlock has officially written his final column for ESPN Page 2, he is perhaps a bit more free to speak his mind; the kids at AOL Sports, his new online employer, tend to have a thicker skin on such matters....
Cultural Oddsmaker: The Irish Menace Of The Ryder Cup
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to say hi....
Satan, Your Ass Is Gigantic And Red; Who Are We Going To Pretend You Are? Liza Minnelli?
You know what sucks about being a Baldwin? NOTHING!...