lightning Page 9 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Today's Ukraine-France Match Is Delayed Because God Is Angry
Hellfire is raining in Donetsk, where the Euro 2012 Ukraine-France match is delayed due to heavy rain and lightning, some of which appears here to have attempted to find its way inside the stadium. (That ain't sunlight.) Clearly Thor is angry Norway failed to qualify....

The Dirty Secrets Of A Sports Arena, As Revealed By A Drunk Stadium Employee Emailing Us At 5:30 P.M.
Last month, I got an email from a guy who works Lightning games at the Tampa Bay Times Forum. Our informant was piss drunk and looking for a place to vent about his job. It will shock and stun you to learn that stadium arenas do not operate like they did on that one Matthew Perry sitcom. I'll let ou...

It's Official, Dominic Moore Is Always Worth A Second-Rounder
In 2009, Dominic Moore went from Toronto to Buffalo for a second-round pick....

Tampa Bay Lightning Fire Mascot Who Was Tackled By Boston Fan
This is no laughing matter. You know it's a big story when the "10 News Investigators" are on the case. And there's a Facebook page in support of the cause. Free ThunderBug! [WTSP, via Puck Daddy]...

Why, Yes, A Boston Bruins Fan Tackled The Tampa Bay Mascot After It Doused Him With Silly String
Thundahbug was wahned to knawck it da fack awf. [CBS Boston]...

Watch Claude Giroux Set Up A Goal With A Pass To Himself Off The Boards
Giroux said he had tested the boards at the St. Pete Times Forum during the Flyers' morning skate, and he puts what he discovered to the test here, to dazzling effect. The subsequent shot Giroux took bounced right to teammate Scott Hartnell for a goal. Which is all well and good. The Lightning sti...

Artem Anisimov Breaks Out The Boomstick, Righteously Pisses Off The Lightning
After scoring his fifth goal of the season, a shorthanded tally in a tie game, Rangers center Artem Anisimov lowered the sights, pumped his stick, and let fly with one of the more demonstrative celebrations of the year. The Lightning took offense and swarmed Anisimov, setting off a penalty bonanza...

Meanwhile, In Competitive Sports From Wednesday Night
This moment of zen brought to you by the 1-3-1 and CBS....

Five North Koreans Tested Positive For Steroids Because They Were Struck By Lightning, Says North Korea
We suspected all along that the DPRK's women's World Cup team would provide us with moments of unintentional comedy, but they've outdone themselves....

North Korea Lost To The US Because They Were Struck By Lightning, Says North Korea
In a truly bizarre press conference, North Korea's coach Kim Kwang Min had an excuse for his team's performance that...I don't think I've ever heard before....

Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills Ruin NHL Awards With Confident, Butchered Pronunciation
Real Housewives Camille Grammer—Kelsey's ex—and Adrienne Maloof—sister of those bankrupt rich man-children who allegedly own the Sacramento Kings—presented the Lady Byng Trophy to Tampa Bay Lightning right wing Martin St. Louis at Wednesday's NHL Awards show. St. Louis is a six-time All-Star, he w...

Network Airing Stanley Cup Finals Does Not Know Who Is In Stanley Cup Finals
This is what you get for slashing Dick Ebersol's $600 billion promo budget....

Hockey Player Misses Five Minutes Of Game Time With Broken Face, Returns In Time For Season-Losing Goal
Your morning roundup for May 29, the day after death told the world that the puffy-faced Grandma Bandit was actually a man....

Phillies Infielder Throws 10-Pitch 19th Inning To Close Out Joey Votto And The Reds
Your morning roundup for May 26, the day after Disney realized that it probably wasn't the best of ideas to trademark American heroes for profit....

Your Bruins/Lightning Game Six Open Thread
So, Boston heads into the St. Pete Times Forum with an opportunity to advance past the Lightning and into the team's first Stanley Cup Finals appearance since 1990....

If You Have Front-Row Seats At An Indians-Sox Game, What Else Are You Going To Do But Shotgun Beers?
Your morning roundup for May 25, the day we were "spoon-fed gold leaf and pharmaceutical cocaine by Ferran Adria himself." Image courtesy tipster Rosina....

Here's A Photo Of Every Single Tampa Bay Lightning Fan
All 800 of them, sending their beloved team off yesterday. Organized on Facebook (of course) and by the team (grassroots it is not), every single man woman or child that roots or ever rooted for the Lightning gathered in a parking lot at Tampa International Aiport and stood in the shape of a lightni...

Watch ESPN's Doris Burke Flub Her Lines About Oklahoma City Arena
Your morning roundup for May 22, the day some people in North Carolina started taking Pirates of the Caribbean too literally, but not in a cool swashbuckling way or anything....

Your Bruins/Lightning Game Four Open Thread
Bruins just took a 1-0 lead on Patrice Bergeron's goal, halfway through the first period. Victor Hedman's fault. Seems like he's been doing that a lot this series....

Your NHL Eastern Conference Finals Open Thread
The Bruins and Lightning split a pair of games in Boston. Tonight, they do battle in Tampa Bay. Discuss....