lionel-messi Page 12 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Chilean Satire Mag Makes A Funny About Messi Getting Finger Up His Butt
“Get ready, Messi,” Chilean magazine The Clinical writes, riffing on Chile defender Gonzalo Jara’s recent finger-in-the-butthole move, as well as Lionel Messi’s oft-mentioned otherworldly abilities ahead of Saturday’s Chile-Argentina Copa América final. Pretty clever, you guys!...

Lionel Messi Turns Two Defenders Into Larry And Moe
Look at the image above. It appears to show two well-positioned Paraguayan defenders on the cusp of shepherding the ball away from Lionel Messi. Now, watch the video below, where Messi skips past one, nutmegs the other, and generally jukes them so hard that they crash into each other, left helpless ...

Court Denies Appeal; Lionel Messi To Face Trial For Tax Fraud Charges
The Barcelona Provincial High Court announced today that Barcelona star Lionel Messi’s appeal has been denied and that he and his father, Jorge Horacio Messi, will face trial for tax fraud, which the court claims occurred from 2007-09. ...

Luis Suárez Puts Away Rebound For 2-1 Barcelona Lead
Just thirteen minutes after Álvaro Morata drew things level, Luis Suárez put away a Lionel Messi rebound to restore Barcelona’s 2-1 advantage. Juventus now has 10 minutes plus stoppage time to get a goal, or the Champions League trophy will go to the Nou Camp....

Lionel Messi's Copa Del Rey Wondergoal, As Called Around The World
The undisputed highlight of the weekend is Lionel Messi’s brilliant goal to open the scoring against Athletic Bibao in Saturday’s Copa del Rey final. We brought you the play as called by ESPN Deportes; here’s a YouTube user who has collected 16 different worldwide commentaries to the play, perhaps t...

Messi Opens Copa Del Rey Final Scoring With Marvelous Goal
Messi is unstoppable. There’s really no other words for this feat that put Barça up 1-0 on Athletic Bilbao in today’s Copa Del Rey final. ...

Lionel Messi Goal Delivers Barcelona The La Liga Title
Barcelona’s win over Atlético Madrid returned Barça to the La Liga champion’s throne today, and it’s a shock to no one that Lionel Messi is the player who delivered them there....

Messi Loops In With Finesse For 399th Barcelona Goal
It always seems to follow that when Cristiano Ronaldo scores a golazo, Lionel Messi is there to answer one of his own. That happened today at Sevilla, when Messi dropped a marvelous slow-motion curler past Sergio Rico for his 399th goal in a Barcelona uniform....

Lionel Messi And Cristiano Ronaldo Find Their Final Forms
For a depressingly large group of actuarial soccer fans, this season's thrilling edition of the duel between temporally and cosmically entwined superstars Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi has mainly served as another set of cudgels to club down the other's reputation and legacy. Go deeper, becau...

Messi Scores 3 But Suárez Leads Barça To Top Of La Liga In 6-1 Win
This is precisely the kind of game Barcelona were hoping to get out of Luis Suárez when bringing him in this summer, and the kind he's been delivering regularly as of late. With his combination of confidence, unceasing work, deadly finishing, and selflessness, he was able to will an unimpressive B...

Luis Suárez Is Back And He's Coming To Devour The World
It feels a little weird saying this about a known shithead, but we can't help but appreciate how Luis Suárez's hard work on the pitch is finally resulting in the goals his play has deserved. But even in the face of criticism earlier in the season, as Suárez struggled to mesh perfectly with his new B...

Yawn: Just Another Unbelievable Messi Pass For Neymar To Chip Home
Jeez, we get it guys, you three Barcelona forwards can score whenever you want. But how many times this season have we seen the ball go from Suárez to Messi to the Twilight Zone to Neymar and into the net? Maybe switch it up once or twice. You know, for our sake....

Messi-To-Neymar Is As Beautiful As Soccer Gets
Lionel Messi has singlehandedly dominated Barcelona's La Liga match today against Elche, but even downtrodden supporters at Estadio Manuel Martínez Valero got their money's worth when Messi found Neymar on a truly sublime assist. It nearly left beIN analyst Ray Hudson at a loss for words....

Cristiano Ronaldo, A Decent Soccer Player, Wins FIFA Player Of The Year
Today, Real Madrid's Cristiano Ronaldo was awarded the 2014 FIFA Ballon d'Or. It's the second year in a row he's been named FIFA's best player, and the third time in his career. The Portuguese winger beat out Argentina's Lionel Messi, German keeper Manuel Neuer, and a bunch of other guys who had no ...

Barcelona Respond To Chaos With Best Win Of The Year
In the picture above, which captures a scene from Barcelona's 3-1 victory over Atlético Madrid last night, you can see Barcelona's entire season. It shows Luis Suárez, Neymar, and Lionel Messi—the three players whose individual brilliance has kept the team in the hunt for all the major trophies de...

Club Disaster Or Not, Neymar, Suárez, And Messi Will Still Fuck You Up
Sure, the world might be falling down around them right now, but put Lionel Messi, Neymar, and Luis Suárez on the pitch, and they're going to wreck shit regardless. The three forwards have all gotten on the score sheet as Barcelona lead Elche 3-0 in the Copa del Rey. Here's how it happened:...

Barcelona Are A Complete Disaster
Barcelona is burning. A glance at the horizon in the direction of Spain and you can see the flames licking the sky, centered on the city's biggest attraction, FC Barcelona's Camp Nou. The fire, which has been smoldering quietly for years now, has already caused considerable damage: the play on the f...

Lionel Messi Shows Off Unreal First Touch On Japanese Game Show
Yeah, we’ve seen that left foot of Lionel Messi’s cushion soccer balls flying at him from all different angles in game, but how about making him boot the ball about 60 feet into the air over a bar, sprint over to where it falls, and try to control it? Yep, still no problem....

Both Of Lionel Messi's Feet Must Be Made Of Glue
Let's ignore the video of Lionel Messi's second goal today for a minute, and just stare at the picture above. That's the world's best left foot plucking a screaming ball out of the air as casually as a frog would an unexpecting fly, or Odell Beckham would a lobbed duck of a pass in pregame warm-up...

Neymar + Suárez + Messi = Destruction
Having the world's fanciest dribbler weave past defenders and flick the ball out to the world's best all-around striker, who then chips a pass to the world's best player, who then pokes it past a defender, then past the keeper is a pretty foolproof strategy, it turns out....