magic Page 24 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after bidding on the Miracle Jesus Spoon ... • Boxing: Welterweights, Joshua Clottey vs. Jose Luis Cruz; super welterweights, Yuri Foreman vs. Saul Roman, in New York. (9 p.m., ET). Fisticuffs in Brooklyn? Certainly not. [Versus] • College basketball: National Invitation Tournament, ch...

All Hail The Sword Of Rathgar!
A confession: We love Medieval Times. We went there for a friend's birthday a couple of years ago, and when we went out drinking afterwards, we ran into the Red Knight. He was surly, even for a knight; he wouldn't even sign our plastic axe. Dick. Anyway, Rashard Lewis is apparently quite the Medieva...

How Do You Like 'Dem Apples, Riley?
My Christmas holiday summed up in five words or less: Clementines, Toblerones and beer. No joke. A million thanks to Alphonso Jackson, Nancy K. Kopp and, of course, Rick Chandler for filling in while I was gone. Your 'Body Shop' gift certificates are in the mail. Now, on to the NBA Closer!...

Knicks Ready To 'Turn The Page' After Tragic Coach Mauling
Our story so far: Skeets is still under quarantine in a small room at the Canadian border, and will not return to the NBA Closer until next week. Filling in today is Nancy K. Kopp, Chairman of the Board of Trustees of the Maryland Retirement and Pension Agency....

Mustaches Amplify Sadness
When you see Stan Van Gundy all pissed off on the TV, you have to go through a lot of mental logic to remember which team he coaches right now. Miami? Yeah, they're bad so that would make sense, but ... wait, no. Houston? I think so... oh, wrong Van Gundy. Cleveland? Does he coach Cleveland? Well, n...

TRAAAAAAAAAAAAADE!!!
The NBA Closer is written by me. I only kept this awkward italicized intro here so I could link to The Basketball Jones podcast. What? Those hits put food on the table, man. Enjoy!...

In Praise Of Dwight Howard
Every two weeks, the gents at Free Darko will be taking a look at the deranged ecosystem that is the National Basketball Association in their own indelible fashion. Here's this week's entry, from Bethlehem Shoals....

Warriors Vs. Road Warriors
The NBA Closer is now written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy....

The Celtics Are No Longer Unstoppable
Forgive us, but we wouldn't help but take a tiny, mostly unjustifiable iota of joy from the Celtics' first loss last night to Orlando. We enjoy watching the Celtics play, don't get us wrong, but seriously: It was nice to see a Boston team finally lose a game....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as ... hey, where did Julie go? She just vanished! ... • NFL: Green Bay at Denver. Favre plus thin oxygen equals wacky fun for the entire family. [ESPN] • NHL: San Jose at Dallas. Sharks are in town, which means it's free skate! [Versus] • Local programming: Please enjoy endless hours ...

If You Anger JJ Redick, His Brother Will Text Your Ass
If this site has had one founding principle from the beginning, it has been: Do not taunt JJ Redick. He is the ruler of this and many other galaxies, and his will is legendary; he could crush us all with his mind. (He can also use his mind to bend spoons and pop collars.) A Florida woman is learning...

The Enigma That Is Billy Donovan
Well, now that lawyers are involved, we can reclassify the Billy Donovan saga from curiously entertaining to officially ugly. We'd love to know the real reason that Donovan balked on his Orlando Magic contract a mere two days after signing it; did he discover the team's troubling history of unprovok...

Gators Deal With The Loss Of Billy Boy
Now that Billy Donovan has officially left the Florida Gators for the Orlando Magic — and EDSBS has been quiet so far — we thought we'd ask the biggest Gators fan we knew, Dan Shanoff, to describe how he's feeling. Here are his words....

Reintroducing Jack Cust
Anyone who has paid attention the world of sabermetrics and Baseball Prospectus over the last few years is probably familiar with Jack Cust. For years, he was that supposed slugging Colorado catcher we were all waiting to take over the National League, the guy we hoped no one else in our fantasy lea...

Grant Hill's Goodbye Party Was Not Much Fun
Out of politeness more than anything else, I thought maybe I should take a second to acknowledge that the NBA did still exist and actually operated on the NFL's special day. Its importance, obviously, is miniscule when in comparison to the issue of which college superstars will lead last year's 3-13...

Free Darko Playoff Pants Party: Pistons Vs. Magic
With Wednesday night's wrapup of the regular season, the playoff matchups are set. There are eight conference quarterfinal contests, and the whole shebang kicks off this tomorrow....

Tim Duncan is Not Tall Enough
Dwight Howard is getting all the credit for this, and sure ... Dwight Howard's freakish abilities speak for themselves. But how about that lob from Hedo Turkoglu? Magic Johnson couldn't have done it better. Picture perfect. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's the best contribution to basket...

Dwight Howard, Enjoying His Youthful Years
You know how we know that the Orlando Magic's Dwight Howard is just starting to break the ceiling of NBA stardom? He's hanging out with porn stars. Specifically, amply bosomed former gubernatorial candidate Mary Carey, who tells the story of meeting Howard in a Luke Is Back, apparently a well-read...

Five Tiny Tidbits On: The Orlando Magic
It's hard to believe, but the NBA season is just around the corner. So come with us now as we present five tiny tidbits on each team, just to get you in the mood. Today we continue with the Southeast Division, so do us a favor and send your tips to [email protected]....

Yeah, We Want To Simulate THIS Guy
A couple of weeks ago, we told you about JJ Redick's appearance on the cover of NCAA College Hoops 2K7. Well, it turns out, it's much worse than you thought: They're actually doing the whole mo-cap suit thing to simulate his movements....