nes Page 496 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Schembechler Dead at 77
Some scary news out of Detroit: Former Michigan coach Bo Schembechler is listed in critical condition after collapsing with an undisclosed ailment this morning. Radio stations in the area have reported that Schembechler had just filmed a game promo for a local ABC affiliate when he collapsed....

Just Two More Days Until Mayhem Reigns
Time to wrap up today with a little game you might have heard about. We were scooped dramatically by ESPN on the Dead Schembechlers, but we will still try to keep up....

Man, If These Guys Can't Get Tickets, No One Can
More Ohio State-Michigan fun: How big is the game this Saturday? Jeez, not even Nickelback can get tickets....

Today In The Upcoming Bloodbath
Well, if it's Tuesday, it must be time for an update on The Game To End All Games, the No. 1 vs. No. 2 Ohio State-Michigan sluggaroo this Saturday. We remain incredibly fond of this matchup and aren't particularly worried about it being "overhyped," as they say, because anyone in danger of fatigue c...

Football Game Delays Vote Counting; You'll Never Guess Where
No more than 3,500 votes separate U.S. Rep Deborah Pryce and her democratic challenger, Mary Jo Killroy in the Ohio congressional race. There are still 18,000 absentee and provisional ballots to be counted. You'd think they might want to count those as soon as possible ... but they're not....

Own Pac-Man's Car!
As anyone who has dealt with the difficult nature of car salesmen, you sometimes just don't know whom to trust. Fortunately, there's one place you know you can find a good deal on all your automobile needs: Buying cars that were once owned by troubled NFL players and have now been repossessed and ...

Fred Smoot's Blanket Coverage
We were just forwarded this shot, from an MSNBC gallery, from last Sunday's Vikings-49ers game. You might not be able to tell from the photo — perhaps you are distracted by the ass — but the defender on the play? None other than Fred Smoot....

The Return Of Ned
A profile in courage from Florida International University: Running back A'Mod Ned, the injured Panther who heroically joined the fray of the infamous Miami-FIU brawl from a month or so ago despite, you know, being on crutches, is expected to return to practice this week and could be able to retur...

A Closer Look At The Late Bryan Pata
As the college football world comes to terms with the tragic, awful death of Miami Hurricanes defensive tackle Bryan Pata, who was shot yesterday outside his apartment, details continue to filter in. The University has not yet announced if the team will play its game Saturday against Maryland....

Set Tasers Phasers To "Conduct"
At halftime of the Michigan-Ball State game on Saturday, of all people, freaking Picard proved something we've always suspected: Anybody can be a damned band conductor....

Bo Schembechler Gets Meta On Us
We've told you repeatedly about the Dead Schembechlers, the Ohio State fan punk band that features thrash ditties like "Bomb Ann Arbor Now" and "Chad Henne is A Motherfucking Joke." (Their official site is right here, though someone should probably mention that no one does splash pages anymore.)...

The Vols Aren't Taking It Well
When I saw that three Tennessee football players had been arrested, I just assumed that one of them was Pac Man Jones. It wasn't the Titans, though, it was the Volunteers, who figure if they can't beat some ass on the field, they should beat some ass in the club....

Yep, The Costume Works: We're Scared
If you were wondering what the Timberwolves' Mike James went as for Halloween this year — and we know you were — then now you know. He went as ... uh, this. Are we sure this isn't that Deelishis lady?...

It's An Intriguing Night In Prince Country
Kind of a quietly fascinating game tonight on "Monday Night Football:" The Patriots, who keep winning even though no one's particularly impressed by them, travel to face the Vikings, who have attempted to fix their sex boat-related woes by hiring a bald mustached man who appears to have never had se...

Five Tiny Tidbits On: The Minnesota Timberwolves
It's hard to believe, but the NBA season is just around the corner. So come with us now as we present five tiny tidbits on each team, just to get you in the mood. Today we continue with the Northwest Division, so do us a favor and send your tips to [email protected]....

The Mike Tyson Of College Football
That was Miami Hurricane player Anthony Reddick apologizing for his helmet-swinging role in the brawl against FIU. I'm pretty sure someone wrote that for him... and they must've just scribbled it really quickly and illegibly, because he seemed to be struggling with it. For some reason....

For Some Guys, Lithuania Is The Promised Land
In the NBA, Tyrone Nesby is probably best known for being the crazy guy on Michael Jordan-led Washington Wizards team that was terrible, dysfunctional, and sad. His career, though, took him on a journey to Lithuania... and one small change of scenery was all Tyrone Nesby, roleplayer, needed to bec...

Today In Broadcasting History
So what now for Lamar Thomas? It's ironic that the only real loser in the big UofM-FIU battle on Saturday was the guy sitting in the announcer's booth — albeit a guy who wanted to get down there and mix it up, or so he said. Thomas, as you know, was cast adrift by Comcast Southeast Sports on Monda...

I Had A Girl, Donna Was Her Name
It seems as if University of Miami president Donna Shalala is forever defending the behavior of her students — she reminds us a lot of Mrs. Garrett from Facts of Life that way — and Tuesday was no exception. Appearing at a coaches' press conference, the feisty administrator said that it was time t...

Lamar Thomas Speaks (Kind Of)
We're having trouble locating it specifically on CanesTime, the message board for Miami football, but several other Scout.com boards have posted what is allegedly a message from recently fired Miami Hurricanes radio broadcaster Lamar Thomas, whose now infamous tirade about beating down FIU players h...