nfl Page 876 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Hines Ward Slowly Turning Into Bill Cosby
From his interview on NFL Live today. If this guy tries to sell you Jell-O Pudding, just smile politely and slowly back away. [ESPN]...

Falcons Officially Release Michael Vick
I don't understand. Did he do something wrong? [ESPN]...

Brad Childress Is Full Of Crap
Brad Childress came out of hiding today to complain about all those unscrupulous reporters and their unnamed sources who make up lies about Brad Childress and create nothing but trouble. Trouble he could end in two seconds if he'd just pick up the phone....

Chad Johnson Loves His Quarterback, Uncomfortable Sexual Metaphors
OchoCinco on his relationship with his Bengal QB: "We're like Brokeback Mountain. I'm going to be with Carson so much in July that I'm going to be the nanny (for his new twins.)" That's not....awkward. [Bengals; PFT]...

Owen Daniels Uses Facebook To Negotiate New Contract With Texans
Owen Daniels, Houston Texans tight end and perennial fantasy sleeper, has taken his dissatisfaction with his current contract public to both friends and strangers across America on his Facebook page....

Ha Ha ... Tom Brady Fell Out Of A Boat
World's Fanciest Human can't even row a kayak down the Charles River without needing to be rescued from knee-deep water! What's that? Still a good-looking, supermodel-having NFL quarterback? Well....at least I didn't fall out of a boat! [Boston Herald]...

Only One Week Left In The Brett Favre Saga
Have mercy, the most annoying story in sports will soon be at end! Unless it doesn't end. Which it won't. Because everything Brett Favre does is special and important and you will never be free of his all-seeing ethereal form....

This Is What You Get For Being A Slacker
If education is a carrot-and-stick operation, then for students in the Cincinnati, the reward for good grades was a chance to meet the Bengals at Paul Brown Stadium. Marvin Lewis accidentally invited the life of the party instead. Oops!...

Donte Stallworth Pleads Not Guilty To Manslaughter Charges
Donte Stallworth's lawyer was in court today to plead not guilty to DUI manslaughter charges and will likely try to use the quirks of Florida law to reduce the charge and keep his client out of jail....

Dallas Cowboys Get What They Want, When They Want It
Irving, Texas, officials possibly suspect that the Cowboy's practice bubble that collapsed last month may have lacked some structure integrity. (Ya think?) They're fairly confident, however, that anyone other than the Cowboys would never have been allowed to build it....

Twitter Posts Aren't Real Journalism, Silly!
Like many newspaper reporters, Tampa Bay beat writer Rick Stroud uses Twitter to connect with his readers and talk about whatever happens to be on his mind—but if you're stupid enough to take his Twits at face value then that's your own stupid fault....

Tom Brady Even Heals Better Than A Normal Person
Brady's surgeon on the quarterback's rehab: "With regard to his recovery of strength, I've never seen anything quite like it. With an average person, it would have taken probably twice as long to get range of motion and strength back." Sweet jeebus, who is this guy? Wolverine? [LA Times]...

A Facebook Dispute, Argued With Ink
"Falcons OL Quinn Ojinnaka is free on bond after being accused of fighting with his wife over Facebook activity. Police said Ojinnaka's wife confronted him about contact with a female friend on Facebook.... Ojinnaka told police his wife began the fight by attempting to stab him with a pen." [ESPN]...

Your Wealth, Now In Wayne Chrebet's Bare Hands
SUBJECT: Wayne Chrebet: FROM: [redacted]@citi.com. "Saw this yesterday, only my firm would hire an ex nfl player who retired because of too many concussions. IMAGINE THE FINANCIAL ADVICE HE COULD GIVE! Please do not attach my name to this, I'd get fired." [Bloomberg]...

Jets Sued For Manipulating Ticket Prices By Men Who Wanted Jets Tickets, For Some Reason
Three men are suing the Jets for manipulating seat-license prices in an auction. The plaintiffs would have an excellent case, I think, if their judgment and credibility weren't immediately called into question by the fact that they were trying to buy Jets seat licenses. In an auction....

Patriots Team Up With State Lotto; NFL Conveniently Forgets That It Pretends To Hate Gambling
Remember the NFL's feigned outrage over sports gambling in Delaware? All that sanctimonious stuff about tarnishing the game's image and leading children to degenerate lives of laying the points with the Pats on the road? Well, apparently none of that applies to state-run lotteries....

Raiders Come To Terms With Fast, Toolsy Budget Airliner
The Raiders are teaming up with "low-budget, long-haul" Air Asia X and sticking their logo on the tailfin of an aircraft, now dubbed the "Commitment To Excellence" plane. A sad metaphor waiting to happen. [Examiner]...

Fake Ben Roethlisberger Has Internet Cancer
Terrible news, everybody. The cyber weirdo who is trolling the internet pretending to be Ben Roethlisberger has imaginary cancer. There's a PayPal link below where you can help send him an virtual bouquet of AOL sign-up CDs....

The NFL's Alarming DUI Problem
Interesting story by Yahoo's Josh Peter about the NFL's most under-reported problem: "At least 73 players on NFL rosters during the 2008 season have been arrested on charges of driving under the influence..."Yahoo!]...

Mark Sanchez Got More Than Free Trunks Out Of That Photo Shoot
You know Jets hunk Mark Sanchez and Hilary Rhoda, that super duper model who he was rubbing up against in his GQ photo shoot? Yeah, they're totally doing it now. [NY Post]...