nit Page 208 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Sad Manchester United Allow Elderly Samuel Eto'o To Score Hat Trick
No one would have imagined this before the season started: Chelsea demolishes Manchester United 3-1, and the only remotely surprising thing is that Samuel Eto'o—a thousand years old, a chronic misfirer—was the man who knocked in the goals. And yet that's how it is....
Witness: Kellen Winslow Was Jerkin' It In His Car Before Pot Arrest
New York Jets tight end Kellen Winslow was arrested for alleged marijuana possession in a parking lot last November, but a newly released police report from the incident reveals that smoking weed may not have been the only thing Winslow was up to that day. He may have also been masturbating in his c...
We All Suck At Watching Football Now
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....
What's Wrong With Manchester United, And How To Fix It
Yesterday, defending Premier League champions Manchester United faced the league's last place team, Sunderland, in the first leg of the League Cup semifinal. After losing the first two matches of 2014 (at home to Tottenham and to Swansea), United were fighting to not lose three straight for the firs...
Penn State's D.J. Newbill Ejected For Shoving Kendrick Nunn In Neck
Plays like this always make me think about the existence of a textbook for broadcasters. "It's always the second guy who gets caught" would be in Chapter 1, along with a section on Aikmanisms like "...and I'm not so sure they didn't do just that, Joe." Anyway, D.J. Newbill was the second guy here—...
Two Japanese Soccer Stars Play Team Of 55 Kids On Game Show
What do you get when you mix Shinji Kagawa and Hiroshi Kiyotake, 33 Japanese kids, and a soccer pitch? Well, a pretty easily scored goal. But what about when you up the number to 55? Pure chaos....
2013: The Year In Cursing
2013 was a banner year for televised cursing. Of course, when A.J. "Fuckin' Shit" Clemente made his appearance, we knew we were in for something special—but he's far from the only media or sports person to utter expletives on-air. Here's our favorite profane moments of 2013....
Another Biblical Hailstorm Suspends Soccer Game
Two hailstorms in just over a week suspending play? Quick, someone check the math on those Mayan Doomsday calendars; maybe they were just a year off!...
Premier League Team Tries Charging Press For Interviews
Newcastle United are coming off a huge win at Manchester United, but they're making news for the wrong reasons: Multiple outlets report that NUFC have approached local and national newspapers, offering them access to players between matches only if they're willing to pay for it....
The Best Squirrel-Related Headline Of The Week
The best in at least a week, maybe more. It's just tremendous: "Scunthorpe fans asked not to dress as squirrels for Alan Knill return."...
This Is The Carnage Of A 26-0 Prep Hockey Game
Notre Dame Academy (Wis.) played Manitowoc (Wis.) in hockey Monday. It was not even close....
Soccer Team Issues Wonderfully Bitchy Statement Over Pee Allegations
Boreham Wood, in the sixth tier of English soccer, lost an FA Cup heartbreaker on Tuesday night at Carlisle United. Afterward, media accounts and photos showed the visitors' locker room to be a mess, including a tea kettle in a urinal, a broken door, and what was reportedly a puddle of urine on the ...
Report: Richie Incognito Also Harassed A Dolphins Staff Member
Hey, it's been a few days since we've had a report about what a gigantic shit head Richie Incognito is. So here's this, from Jason Cole at the National Football Post....
Hollywood's Most Beloved Comedian Is Martin Short
David Kamp's Vanity Fair profile:...
An Interview With Richie Incognito, Italian Teenager
Because we don't work out with Richie Incognito, we weren't able to land him for an interview. So we did the next best thing: We spoke with 17-year-old Richie Incognito, a student from Varese, Italy, and asked him his feelings on the Dolphins imbroglio....
An Emotional Shannon Sharpe Rips The Dolphins Locker Room
On CBS's pregame show, Shannon Sharpe had some very strong words for the Dolphins, less about their handling of the Incognito-Martin fallout, and more about a locker room that let things get to the point where a white player can call a teammate a "half-nigger" and it's supposed to be taken in good h...