owl Page 136 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Intrafamily Squabble For Ownership Of The Broncos Is Only Getting Uglier
Since 2014, the Denver Broncos have been operated by a three-person trust, set up after longtime owner Pat Bowlen was forced to step down from his post due to advancing Alzheimer’s disease. The trust was responsible for running the team, as well as deciding which of Bowlen’s seven children from two ...
Goal Disallowed After Puck Ricochets Off Unfortunate Referee's Dick And Balls
The Florida Panthers are up on the St. Louis Blues by the score of 1–0 in the second period Tuesday night. The score looked for a moment like it would be tied at one goal apiece, after Blues defenseman Robert Bortuzzo beat Roberto Luongo in, um, unconventional fashion:...
Temple's Interim Head Coach Is Fired The Hell Up To Play A Bowl Game In Shreveport
The Temple Owls will travel to Shreveport, La. on Dec. 27 to take on Duke in the Independence Bowl. You’d be hard pressed to find five people on the planet who are excited about this game, but one of those people is definitely longtime Temple assistant Ed Foley....
Russell Wilson, What, And Why, And What
The Seahawks went into halftime of their Monday Night Football clash against the Vikings* holding a 3–0 lead. It wasn’t a real pretty half of football. Kirk Cousins and Russell Wilson combined for 71 yards of passing on 20 attempts, and the teams put together exactly two drives of anything that cou...
Steelers Waste Amazing Hook-And-Ladder Play Against Raiders With Smelly Wet Fart
For a brief moment, it looked as though the Steelers had become the second team today to pull off a miraculous late-game hook-and-ladder play to snatch a last-second victory. With 15 seconds left in regulation, Ben Roethlisberger, who was on his second attempt at a Willis Reed impression, got the pl...
Some Basketball Stuff The Chicago Bulls Did While The Boston Celtics Were Beating The Stuffing Out Of Them
So, ah, it didn’t go real great for the Bulls last night, as they played their second game in as many days, at home against the hot and better-rested Boston Celtics. It took the Bulls more than six minutes to score their first point, a free-throw; they were down 18 before they made an actual field g...
Welcome To Football Hell
Football can be perfect and beautiful. It can also suck complete and total ass for everyone involved. Today, we travel to Mankato, Minn. for the latter experience....
Zion Williamson Is Human
Zion Williamson had 18 and 12 and Duke won 84-54 on Wednesday night—which would have been impressive if they hadn’t been playing the Hartford Hawks (apparently a real college basketball team and not, like, a D-League franchise). As per usual, there were powerful, highlight-reel dunks from the Blue D...
Jets Overcome 16-0 Lead With Thrilling Come-From-Ahead Loss
For once, everything seemed to be going against the Jets....
Chargers Hit Game-Winning Field Goal Despite Steelers' Threepeat Of Offsides Block Attempts
After Philip Rivers drove his team 64 yards down the field, the Los Angeles Chargers set up for a game-winning field goal attempt on the Pittsburgh Steelers’ 21-yard line. Mike Badgley had missed a field goal earlier in the game, but that was from 52 yards. The 39-yard attempt he was preparing for w...
Here Is An Utterly Maddening Sequence Of Soccer Errors
Unlike most lowlight-reel soccer fuckups, this comedy of errors actually happened in a meaningful game played between two good-ish teams. Standard Liege led Sevilla by a goal in their Thursday Europa League meetup, and they were presented with a perfect opportunity to slam the door shut on the Spani...
Here Is a Truly Putrid Basketball Sequence
The Bucks lost to the Hornets yesterday, thanks largely to the following sequence in which they missed what feels like 15 shots in what feels like five seconds. There’s no one standout here, as every single Milwaukee player’s ability to trip over himself is remarkable and laudable; a special note of...
One Khris Middleton Shot Blocked By 60 Percent Of Hornets Lineup
One pretty sure sign that you’ve chosen a bad shot is when it is stuffed back in your face by a defender. Khris Middleton is having an excellent season for the Milwaukee Bucks, but if your shot is blocked by three different defenders, probably you owe your teammates a sincere apology. ...
![Henry Anderson's Dick And Balls Rudely Squished By Cordarrelle Patterson [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/ixehh9mgwgbeldk2uzsj.gif)
Henry Anderson's Dick And Balls Rudely Squished By Cordarrelle Patterson [Update]
Cordarrelle Patterson was brought down by Henry Anderson after a one-yard gain on a first-and-five run early in the fourth quarter of Sunday’s Patriots-Jets tilt. Patterson, who I think it will henceforth be fair to assume is a total sociopath, expressed his displeasure with that turn of events by c...
Derek Carr Either Forgot It Was Fourth Down Or Just Gave Up
Here’s a representative lowlight from the Raiders’ 20-6 loss to the Chargers today: QB Derek Carr, after a timeout to set up a crucial fourth-down play, throws the ball directly into the turf....
FitzMagic Isn't Strong Enough To Make This Pass Legal
Tampa Bay Bucs QB Ryan Fitzpatrick almost made a magical play on a long third down in the first quarter of today’s game against Washington. With the ball at midfield, Fitzpatrick dropped back, did a supernatural job of escaping the pass rush, then took off running before he, uh, threw a forward pass...
Raheem Sterling Wins A Penalty By Tripping Over Himself
In today’s match against Shakhtar Donetsk, Manchester City star Raheem Sterling did something incredibly embarrassing when he blew a very good scoring opportunity by tripping over his own feet. Luckily for him, the referee followed that blunder with an even more monumental failure of his own when he...
This Dwight Howard Shot Was A Crime Against Basketball
The pestilential Wizards lost last night, again, bringing their record this season to a pitiful 2-8. Terminally unfunny center Dwight Howard—whose teammates universally cannot stand him—is back from a butt injury, and the Wizards are in such a sorry state of internecine bickering that Howard is the ...
Was Anyone Even <i>Trying</i> To Stop Neal Pionk On This Goal?
This goal looks straight out of a movie. In a 4-on-4 with under three minutes to go in a tie game, a little-known defenseman—in this case New York Rangers kid Neal Pionk—takes the puck from behind his own net and just ... continues with it until he scores the game-winner. It shouldn’t be possible in...
Markelle Fultz Shooting Form Update: Shoulder Still Crab Meat?
The Sixers could sure use some shooting. In Sunday’s jarringly one-sided loss to the Brooklyn Nets, Sixers starters combined to produce zero made three-pointers on just six total attempts. On the season, Philadelphia’s starting lineup has attempted just 18 total three-pointers in 53 minutes of cour...