owl Page 190 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Chinese Dunk Contest Features Terrible, Hilarious Dunk
The Chinese Basketball Association had its all-star game over the weekend. I really don't understand why this guy was invited to participate in the dunk contest:...

We All Make Mistakes
Clearly the Colts feel inspired by the turnover-laden NFC title game....

Utah State Player Throws Down Huge Dunk, And Pays Dearly For It
Like Indiana Jones, Utah State guard JoJo McGlaston knows how to fly, but maybe not so much how to land....

This Is A Suboptimal Basketball Result
Throw it down, big man! Just throw it down a bit closer to the basket....

Why Tonight's Heavyweight Title Fight Shouldn't Be On The Level
While professional boxing unquestionably often involves two fighters hitting each other as hard as possible in order to win their match, it also often puts business first. It looks as if a lot of X's and O's are being moved around in two upcoming heavyweight title bouts, presumably as long-range s...

Fox Business Delivers Stupidest Super Bowl Report Possible
Fox Business Network attempted to report on Super Bowl ticket sales today with threats that "the NFL is expecting record-low attendance." That's not true, but somehow what reporter Elizabeth MacDonald went on to say got even stupider....

Kitten Bowl Player Names, Ranked
Cat puns are the highest form of humor. Now that Hallmark Channel has unveiled the roster for this year's Kitten Bowl, it's time to subjectively and correctly rank the competitors' names....

No Pressure, Though
The Jets have chosen their next head coach, former Cardinals defensive coordinator Todd Bowles. He may or may not be the right man for the job, but he's sure as hell got the right name for it....

The NFL Has No Idea Who's Going To Coach The Pro Bowl
Try to care about the Pro Bowl for a second. Or, rather: try to care about some NFL execs' lives being made more stressful because of the Pro Bowl. (See? Much easier when you think of it that way.)...

The Play's Over, Man
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

Here Is The All-Time "Albert Achievement Awards" Blooper Reel
Veteran announcer Marv Albert has been running blooper reels as a guest on David Letterman's program for decades. In his 126 appearances on either Late Night With David Letterman or Late Show, the "Albert Achievement Awards" (set, always, to that ragtime vamp) have established the canon of sports ...

Bad Knicks Goober Flings Hook Shot To Nowhere
That's Cole Aldrich, starting center for the New York Knicks, draining a sweet turnaround hook shot on the invisible ghost-hoop six feet to the right of the regular one. Good move....

Roy Hibbert's Attempted Game-Winner Was, Um, Not Good
Roy Hibbert's box score from last night's game against the Lakers is nothing to sneeze at—12 points and 11 rebounds in 29 minutes is ...fine—but the Pacers' giant did not end the game on a high note....

Florida Running Back Shits Pants
So, the Florida Gators are playing East Carolina today in the Birmingham Bowl, and at half, Florida's giving the Pirates the business. But that, comrades, is not why we are here....

Kobe Flips Out Because Jeremy Lin, Rest Of Lakers Are Morons
Kobe Bryant hit a clutch three last night to bring the Lakers within one of the Grizzlies at Staples Center. He did this with 24 seconds remaining in the game, which meant that Los Angeles needed to foul and stop the clock. Jeremy Lin, guarding the Memphis ball-handler, did nothing. So Kobe took mat...

Swansea Give Up Second Hilaribad Goal Of The Week, Now To Max Power
Fresh off this embarrassing performance Monday, Swansea City keepers are continuing their reign of clearance terror today in the FA Cup. This time, it's Gerhard Tremmel who can't get the ball past League Two side Tranmere Rovers midfielder Max Power. Who coaches these keepers?...

Heroically Lazy DeMarcus Cousins Takes An Entire Possession Off
Honestly, you have to respect the amount of effort DeMarcus Cousins puts into not giving a single shit on this possession. This would make Rasheed Wallace proud....

Maybe "Bull" Isn't The Best Nickname For A Running Back Named "Conner"
There's no way this was done intentionally, but I'm pretty sure Pitt running back James Conner would prefer for his nickname to be anything but "Bull."...

What's The Deal With This Shifty Ohio State Fan?
I find myself hypnotized by this seemingly innocuous crowd shot from last night's Sugar Bowl, in which the lady at the center of the frame silently comes to some sort of world-shattering realization. What's going on in this lady's head?!...
