p Page 7607 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Today in MLB Blogs
MLB Blogs wants you on board, and official spokesman Tommy Lasorda isn't taking no for an answer. In an effort to entice you, the site has an exclusive Lasorda video up today, which features old clips of Tommy when he managed the Dodgers, about 50 years ago. Then comes the hard sell, as Tommy is see...

SI.com: The Web's Pauly Shore
From the things that were a bad idea from the start department: Some poor sucker at SI.com tries an imaginary conversation between Larry David and Nate Newton. Highlight: So? It bothers me. Sitting within a 10-foot radius of this kind of gluttony bothers me. And what I am supposed to do when I'm fin...

Tiger Woods Remains World's Whitest Man
Tiger Woods didn't play in whatever bland, corporate-sponsored backslap-fest the PGA Tour hosted last weekend, but that's because he was in Las Vegas. Gambling away millions? Snorting lines off stripper cleavage? Drinking milk past its expiration date? Anything? Of course not. It's Tiger Woods. H...

SI.com's Fun Advertorials
We'll be honest: We don't know who Rob Stanger is. According to the bio that runs with his new column on SI.com, he is the head teaching pro at the Golf Academy at Mission Hills in Rancho Mirage, Calif., is recognized as a Golf magazine Top Teacher in America in the West Region. How this qualifies h...

Ricky Williams 15 Pounds Lighter, And It Ain't The Hair
In the wake of the news that Ricky Williams is eager to rejoin the Miami Dolphins, Florida Today's Carl Kotala gives five reasons why Ricky should return and, to be all schizo on us, five reasons why he shouldn't. Being a sportswriter, he throws a couple lame Whizzinator and Lenny Kravitz jokes i...

Man, That Paul Shirley IS Funny!
Phoenix Suns forward Paul Shirley, beloved bethrothed to Our Bill Simmons, is posting again, because he's certainly not playing. We find him slightly less amusing than everyone else does, but this week, he does have his moments:...

Mark Cuban Needs A Hug
When their teams are eliminated from the postseason, most owners:...

Tillman's Parents Blast Military
Pat Tillman's parents blasted the military yesterday for lying to them about the circumstances of their son's death. Tillman, a former strong safety for the Arizona Cardinals, was killed by family fire in Afghanistan in April 2004. "The truth may be painful, but it's the truth," says his mother. "Yo...

The Mustache Is The Most Thing Normal About Them
We don't know whether or not this is offically classified as a "sport" or not, but SportsFilter directs us to the preliminaries of the World Beard and Mustache Championship. The real finals are in October, but the training goes on year round. (Weird soldier outfit is optional.) Interestingly enoug...

Where's Barry?
All kinds of news happening with Barry Bonds. He deigned to bless the world with his presence at the Giants-A's series, reports have him off his IV and ready to begin rehab and even inspiring ESPN village idiot Skip Bayless to write another 1,000 words about nothing at all. But where, we ask, are...

Carlos Zambrano's Internet Addiction
It's a shame the Chicago Sun-Times had to go and ruin all our fun; they've refuted the story that Carlos Zambrano's recent injury woes were due to too much time on the computer. The Cubs say that Zambrano's injury is not carpal tunnel syndrome, though they admit they did ask him to spend less tim...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while secretly watching Desperate Housewives ......

To Watch Tonight ...
Fever has reached 109 degrees. So weak. Must ... reach ... remote ... Game 6: Spurs at SuperSonics: With one more win, San Antonio's Manu Ginobili can totally buy whatever country it is he comes from. Diamondbacks at Astros: Just for laughs Clemens should come out wearing a Yankees cap. Game 6: Pist...

Great Moments In Participatory Journalism
We really can't add much to this story of ESPN.com racing correspondent Bruce Martin being arrested for drunk driving and resisting arrest in Indianapolis....

Leftovers: Will Rice And Clarett Be Friends?
Jerry Rice's desperate search for employment could land him in Denver. [Denver Post] Onterrio Smith dismissed from Vikings. Wonder what he'll do with his spare time? [Minneapolis Star-Tribune] Kentucky slightly less egregiously racist than it was 20 years ago. [ESPN.com] Group of dorks already doing...

Somewhere, Mark Cuban Is Smiling
Charges Dropped Against Hockey Owner Who Punched Referee [Danbury News-Times]...

Put That Coffee DOWN
As Sinead O'Connor once said: "Fight the real enemy." In this case, the World Anti-Doping Agency says that enemy is coffee. The agency head, the unfortunately named Dick Pound, says the agency is considering putting caffeine on the banned substances list. Apparently the Australian Institute of Sport...

"I'm Having Dreams About Grant Wistrom"
One of our favorite mailing lists is the NFLwives club Yahoo Group. A recent discussion concerning which white football players would be willing to date black women (don't ask) yielded this tidbit from a poster named "first_chose":...

Today in MLB Blogs
Where We Look At MLB's Charming Attempts To Revolutionize The Interweb ... First they went on strike, and you welcomed them back. Then they admitted to taking performance-enhancing drugs, and you shrugged as you renewed your season tickets. Then they invaded Iraq on false intelligence claims, and ....