phil Page 200 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Phil Simms Keeps His Eye On The Balls
One of our favorite ongoing gags at Out Sports is the running tab of homoerotic comments made by CBS analyst Phil Simms during his telecasts. Favorites from the past include "[Miami running back] Lamar Smith doesn't look like much in his underwear" and his constant references to Dan Marino as "a h...

Blogdome: Bill Simmons Edition
• Sports blogger goes after Bill and Chuck for trashing sports bloggers. [The Mighty MJD] • In full book promotion mode, Bill shows up on blogger radio show and actually predicts the Yankees to win. [Mr. Irrelevant] • The Phillies might be pretty much done in the playoff chase, but hey, look, they'r...

NFL Roundup: Kickers Soak Up All The Drama
• Like everyone else who is prone to breaking their spine whenever there's a stiff wind, we've always had an affinity for kickers. So when Cowboys bully tackle Larry Allen went after former XFL kicker Jose Cortez after he missed an extra point — to be fair, Cortez got a little lipp — we cringed th...

Donovan McNabb, White Quarterback
We're not Professional Sports Columnists, but we'd have to say, just to keep our noses clean, the last thing we'd mention when discussing Eagles QB Donovan McNabb would be race. We'd mention his hairline, his goatee, even his ridiculous commercials, but race? That's OK, thanks, we'll be over here ...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 1 p.m. MLB with Steve Phillips: OK, seriously, the Mets front office is missing about 17 staplers. What in the world could you be doing with them? • 1:30 p.m. Louisville DE Elvis Dumervil: We somehow doubt that you're going to make it ...

NFL Roundup: Daunte's Blues
• If you somehow were able to make an emotionless, painless robot clone of Bea Arthur, and you pounded that clone in the face with a polo mallet for 25 minutes, then slammed that head in a car door 15 times, then severed the head with an exceptionally long and sharp toenail, then put the head in a...

Leftovers: Take This Job And Shove It
• There is nothing more dangerous than an angry man in compression shorts: Lance Armstrong re-retires. [Instant Punditry] • Kim Clijsters' coach quits, perhaps in a huff, we're not sure. [tennisace] • Fantasy Prison Camp: Former Braves pitcher sent to the Gray Bar Hotel. [Atlanta Journal-Constitutio...

Blogdome: Ripping Favre
• So, hey, now that we think about it ... Brett Favre was kind of a dick to Javon Walker. [Sports Frog] • Hot new hockey site launching later today, by tapped-in anonymous blogger. Hey, it's a growth industry; hockey can't get any less popular. [HockeyBuzz] • Ryan Howard is the Dontrelle Willis of h...

Leftovers: P.S., I Love You
• OSU tight end Ryan Hamby receives hate mail, drops it. [Around the Oval] • Rams exec leaves threatening phone message on columnist's voice mail. We love stories like that. [STL Today • Bill Simmons finally acknowledges that he works for the same company as Mario Lopez. [Sports Guy's World] • The D...

Jacked-Up Ref Will Not Be Taunted Online
Notoriously overmuscled NFL referee Ed Hochuli has long been a popular figure with the gay sports fan community, thanks to his cartoonishly large biceps. (Apparently, gays aren't the only fans; witness this hilarious roundup of homoerotic comments by CBS analyst Phil Simms, including some drooling...

Scuffle? That Ain't No Stinking Scuffle
The Falcons beat the Eagles 14-10 in the "Monday Night Football" opener last night, but, for whatever reason, all anyone wants to talk about this morning is the pregame fight that ended with the ejections of Eagles linebacker Jeremiah Trotter and Falcons cornerback Kevin Mathis....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while conjuring that elaborate voodoo curse on the Saints' next opponent ... • NFL: Falcons' Vick, Eagles' Owens combine to inspire all kinds of feather-related headlines in Falcons' 14-10 win. • MLB: Bonds returns to take Giants' minds off of missing the playoffs. • MLB: Willis wins...

Welcome Back, Barry and T.O! It's Like You Were Never Here
Well, the night you've all been waiting for is here. The return of two of our very favorite subjects is tonight: Barry Bonds and Terrell Owens. Bonds is slated to bat fourth tonight against the Padres, and people are wondering whether or not they're gonna start walking him again. Meanwhile, T.O. i...

To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as your hairline recedes considerably faster than the New Orleans floodwater ... • MLB: Padres at Giants. Barry throws down his crutches, returns to lineup. • Pickup basketball: NBA players' Hurricane Relief Game. • MNF: Eagles at Falcons. That lovable Terrell Owens plucks at your hear...

Leftovers: Bud Selig's European Vacation
• Ducks across the pond: MLB to play games in Europe in '07? [MSNBC] • Westbrook serves Eagles with divorce papers. Wonder where he learned that from. [For The Birds] • Say it ain't so: Red Auerbach sent to hospital. [CelticsBlog.com] • Pickup game: LeBron, Kobe, KG in for Katrina relief. [Minneapol...

Terrell Owens' Suspicious Charity
Now, far be it from us to accuse any athlete of being anything less than 100 percent magnanimous in all of his charitable endeavors ... but we couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at Eagles flapjaw wide receiver Terrell Owens' newest attempt to confuse human beings into mistaking him for a nice fell...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while stuck firmly in the tire swing ... • MLB: Pedro tees 'em up, Phillies hit 'em out. Ah, that's the Mets we know. • A day after taking first batting practice, an exhausted Bonds takes a day off. • Marlins' Hermida peaks at 21; hits grand slam in first major league at-bat....

Terrell Owens Update: Still Keeping It Real
We haven't checked in on Terrell Owens for a while; how's it goin', Terrell? Well, looks like he and Donovan McNabb still aren't talking, which isn't a big deal, since we can't imagine their level of discourse is all that high anyway. ("Donovan, I'm concerned about the lack of geopolitical debate ...

Larry Bowa, Civic Wonder
To combine reality and fantasy for a moment, ESPN analyst Larry Bowa has been named a Distinguished Little League Graduate award. In response, the ever-refined Larry Bowa responded through the great Yard Work:...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... · 11 a.m.. MLB With Buster Olney: Come on ... you KNOW who's tested positive, don't you? Just tell us. Come on. You know you want to. · Noon. MLB With Steve Phillips: Aw, man, nobody tells Steve Phillips anything. No point in even asking...