politics Page 47 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Confessions Of A Second-Grade Reaganite
Ronald Reagan would have been 100 years old this year, but he's dead now and riding ponies up in heaven or something. I was in second grade in 1984, when Reagan defeated Walter Mondale in the biggest election landslide in American history. And for reasons unknown to me now, I appear to have adored t...

More Bad Madness On The Sepp Blatter Campaign Trail
A week before FIFA's presidential elections, another evil-smelling troll has escaped from the basement of Sepp Blatter's Swiss chalet. The current source of horror: Mohamed bin Hammam, Blatter's rival in the elections, was charged yesterday with offering bribes to members of the Caribbean Football U...

Now They're Making Fun Of Jay Cutler In The Wisconsin Senate Race
Poor Jay Cutler. Jay Cutler did not ask for any of this. He did not ask to be born with the most hangdoggery hangdog face of all time. He did not ask for you to question his toughness. And he did not ask to become the punchline in the Wisconsin Senate Race. But that is what has happened....

Why Hockey Has Gone Totally Gay For The Latest Homophobia Debate
Hockey, for a sport that's nominally proactive in areas ranging from replay to concussions, has never been especially progressive. No one expects the openly gay pro athlete, the inevitable big story for the next decade, to come from the NHL. While other leagues have John Amaechi and Billy Bean and E...

Wild Australian Horse Decides To Run Away From A Steeplechase Course And Over The Crowd
Your morning roundup for May 6, the day Willie Mays becomes an octogenarian....

An Essay About Osama Bin Laden's Death, Constructed Entirely Out Of Athletes' Tweets
SOURCES: OSAMA BIN LADEN IS DEAD!!! WATCHING CNN NOW... THE PRESIDENT TO ADDRESS THE NATION SHORTLY... I got off the plane,went in my hotel rm, turned on TV, saw all those people outside the WH and thought "did the Skins win another SB?" LOL. Osama Bin Laden dead????? Whoa!!!! Osama Bin Laden Dead. ...

Paul Shirley And The Fat Woman Get Political
You remember Paul Shirley. We once described him as a "onetime baller, sometime music critic and all-around man of letters." At the time we were discussing his controversial freelance piece on post-earthquake Haiti, and certain points like asking them to "use a condom once in a while."...

Canada Acknowledges That Its Hockey Is More Important Than Its Politics
Canada has rescheduled a French federal election debate to accommodate the opening game of the Montreal-Boston game on Thursday. We admire the compromise: here in the states, we'd probably just have had to choose based on which event made for a better drinking game....

Wahhhhhhhhh You Put Politics In My Sports!
Last week, we posted this column making fun of Gregg Easterbrook's criticism of President Obama filling out a bracket. Now, this wasn't really a political post. It was a post designed to say to horrible things about Gregg Easterbrook, which I'd argue is a nonpartisan cause. But here is what happens ...

Foolish New York Assemblyman Makes MMA In New York More Dangerous
Way back when (circa 2000), MMA was banned in many states. In the places where it was legal, the bloodsport was regulated with varying degrees of competency. Today, the MMA map looks quite different as sanctioning and better rules have spread across the land. With one notable holdout....

Luke Scott Turns Winter Meetings Into Tea Party Convention
The Orioles OF takes a harmless Q&A and veers it right off the road. It quickly goes from talk of beards and hunting to the Second Amendment and his belief that Obama was not born in this country. [Big League Stew]...

Last Night's Winner: Lunatic America
So, yeah, the towering weirdos and self-styled public slapdicks are big winners yet again, and this being America, we cannot let such a momentous occasion pass without being loudly stupid about it....

This Man Actually Ran For Office Yesterday
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Zach Galifianakis Will Probably Smoke Even More Pot On TV If California Legalizes It
On Friday's Real Time, Out Cold funnyman Zach Galifianakis smoked a joint during a panel discussion of California's Proposition 19 ballot initiative. In related news, Fox News's Margaret Hoover probably listens to a lot of Miles Davis on her days off....

If You’re Not Rich In America, You Are Fucked
There's an election coming up tomorrow, and I haven't paid any attention to it because, at this point, whatever asshole they stick in office will be no different from the asshole they stuck in there before....

Randy Moss's "Disgusting Act" Finally Put To Political Use, And The NFL Isn't Happy
Wisconsin Senator Russ Feingold's new campaign commercial compares "excessive" touchdown celebrations—including Randy Moss's infamous "mooning" of the Lambeau faithful—to the behavior of Washington lobbyists. It's a bit of a stretch, but the NFL is characteristically up in arms....

Dead Political Journalism Of The Week: <em>The New York Times</em> On Linda McMahon
The New York Times's Matt Bai tediously tries to answer the question no one anywhere is asking: "Can Linda McMahon Win in a State That Defines Preppy?"...

Baseball Is A Sport For Conservatives, Says Conservative
Here's an argument that baseball is inherently right-wing, because it's American, merit-based and unchanging (all false to some degree, by the way). I guess this means football is for dirty pinkos? [Daily Caller]...

La Russa, Pujols Will Apolitically Attend Glenn Beck's Totally Apolitical Rally
Can we all agree by now that the allegedly thoughtful Tony La Russa, who maybe you've heard is a lawyer and who walks the earth cogitating profoundly on such matters as lineup construction and puppies, is really just an all-around paste-eating dumbass?...

Miami Mayor Joins The Marlins Pile-On
Miami Mayor Tomás Regalado, citing those Marlins' financial statements that show what the city probably should've known already, now would prefer not to spend $100 million of the public's money on a boondoggly parking garage for the team's boondoggly new stadium....