pr Page 857 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hugh Johnson Update: Bonus Edition
And somewhere, Maurice Clarett asks his cellmate to get off him for a second, so he can check out the final score and smile....
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 4
I swear I just saw Maurice Clarett putting down that new sod as part of a work release program. - VanillaThrilla6...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 3
Inappropriate conversation of the moment (and words I may be eating later): Friend1: I'm not worried about this Bo thing. Troy Smith does not respect your dead elders! Friend 2: Troy Smith feasts on your tears! - Leebert1981...
Today In The Premiership...
• Sheffield United 1-2 Manchester United. Wayne Rooney put Manchester United on his back today and earned them a crucial 2-1 victory over Sheffield United. Sheffield led after a goal in the 13th minute, but a couple of clean Rooney strikes gave the Reds the win. I don't think Rooney's performance ...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 2
He doesn't diddle Brady Quinn's sister, but Paul Poslunzy is earning my respect, he is much better than AJ Hawk. For the sake of comparison let's hope that he's all over Chad Henne's sister. - John L. Smith's back-hand slap...
Start Saving Up For A Good Boning, Courtesy Of Mike Tyson
Here comes the perfect opportunity for the first-ever Ladies Only Deadspin Field Trip: Mike Tyson has reportedly agreed to be a male prostitute at Heidi Fless's new manwhorehouse in Nevada....
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 1
Corso's Gameday Math: Rutgers loses to the 'Ville by 51 last year + Wins by 3 this year = 48 point turnaround. Oh that Corso sure is a master of mathematics... 51+3=48, Incredible. - Ian, Lexington, KY...
The Greatest YWML Reference Of All Time (So Far)
So, Saturday morning, we woke up, full of enthusiasm for a beautiful New York City afternoon, and we checked our email. There were, strangely, 211 new email messages; that's a lot for a weekend. We weren't sure what we'd missed; did Carl Monday do a story on Fred Smoot or something?...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 4
With the afternoon of college football winding down, South Carolina and Florida are about to come down to the wire. I have no real rooting interest, and I sort of hate Steve Spurrier... but it would be sort of awesome to see at least a couple of those one-loss "but we deserve the BCS championship ...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 3
I think the best part of living in Big Ten country is that you are always assured a game with Indiana, Illinois or Northwestern. Oh, did I say best thing? I meant I want to pick my eye out with a grapefruit spoon. - Victoria Times...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 2
Glad to see Auburn is taking advantage of the loss by Louisville by being taken behind the hedges at Georgia, not too mention the side judge just pulled his hamstring. - EPS...
Today In The Premiership...
Aston Villa 1-0 Everton. Not a great day for Everton... midfielder Tim Cahill was taken out on a stretcher, and they lost at home to Aston Villa despite dominating the play for long stretches of time. The extent of Cahill's injury isn't known just yet, but since a stretcher was required, the injur...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 1
I slept late. What's the news on Corso's wang today? - Tuffy Rhodes...
Is It Too Late To Cast Tom Cruise?
We missed our copy of ESPN: The Magazine this week, so we didn't catch this terrifying, surreal tidbit, but the fine folks at Dirty Laundry did:...
On To Victory! (Well, Not Necessarily THAT Kind Of "Victory")
When you're a high school soccer coach, you've got several options when it comes to motivating your team. You can help them practice diving. You can teach them to pick up the football players' girlfriends when they're at a road game. You can even shower them with flop sweat. All kinds of choices....
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 4
Other than the Michigan close call against Ball State and Joe Paterno's osteoporosis, it hasn't been that eventful of a day in college football. The biggest game of the day, at least in terms of national rankings, is happening on CBS right now: Tennessee leads LSU 10-7 very early in the third quarte...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 3
LSU just took a 7-0 lead over Tennessee in the only moderately interesting game of the day. Jamarcus Russell hit Craig Davis for a 23-yard touchdown pass in the second quarter. Joe Paterno and his bionic leg were not able to overcome Wisconsin, losing 13-3. Notre Dame is mauling North Carolina, wh...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 2
Penn State head coach Joe Paterno was plowed into by one of his own players on the sidelines, and he suffered some kind of a leg injury. It's never a good thing to see an old man hurt, but the upside is that it's inspired some of you....
Today In The Premiership...
Today feels like a fine day to celebrate the legacy of Sir Alex Ferguson. As of Monday, he will have been Manchester United's manager for 20 years, and Guardian Unlimited has this list of his best all-time quotes. I'll be honest, in half of them, I don't know what the hell he's talking about, but I ...
Hugh Johnson Project, Update 1
South Florida leads Tyler Palko and Pitt 14-3 at the half, behind the strength of two fake punts, and a quarterback named Grothe that might be the best college or professional quarterback in all of Southern Florida. Florida State is hammering Virginia, 17-0 in a battle of two of the many ACC teams t...