pr Page 857 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Just A Bunch Of Nerds, Debating Nerdom
We're big fans of Fire Joe Morgan's weekly deconstructions of ESPN analyst Joe Morgan's chats on ESPN.com — even if the chats of late, in the words of Fire Joe Morgan itself, have had "entirely un-Morgan-like reason and coherence" — and, to have some fun themselves, the folks at St. Louis Cardinals ...
Jose Canseco, Professional Wrestler (Of Course)
We're not even going to pretend to be surprised here: Jose Canseco is rumored to making an appearance at Wrestlemania this spring. Perhaps it is telling that the people who are most concerned about this development are not baseball fans, but wrestling fans. Seems like the WWE — remember, that's wh...
Bengals' Johnson Keeps Swooning Over Oprah
Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson is known for being brash, loud and Keyshawn Johnson's cousin. But we prefer knowing him for something so cute it makes us want to dance: He's in love with Oprah Winfrey. No, really. Last month, Johnson blessed us with the immortal quote: "It might soun...
From the Carrier Dome to Bracco's Bed
Here's a great heads-up from a tipster: Former Syracuse guard Jason Cipolla — who hit a huge shot against Georgia in the second round of the 1996 NCAA tournament; the Orangemen eventually made the national championship game — has been dating "Sopranos" head shrinker Lorraine Bracco for about three...
Choppin' Wood At Baseball Prospectus
The dork fraternity at Baseball Prospectus has long fascinated us. We always assumed they either were four feet tall and were still breast-feeding, or they were the opposite of what most think, all ripped dudes with schlongs that scraped the ground. Turns out, we're completely wrong: They're actua...
The New "He Hate Me"
Wide receiver Peerless Price has been nothing but a disaster for the Atlanta Falcons since he was signed as a free agent from the Buffalo Bills; fantasy owners have been wanting to behead him for years. Well, the Falcons finally took care of the whacking today, cutting Price from the team....
Not To Be Confused With "Ladies Night"
In case you were wondering where Robin Williams will be on the night of August 25, you can probably find him at the Potomac Nationals game. Why? It's "Hairiest Back At The Ballpark Night!" No, really. The winner will win a laser hair removal service valued at $2,500. Which seems like a big waste ...
Get Ready: Another 'Roid Name Is Coming
Orioles roid head — that's a new name we're trying out; great, ain't it? — Rafael Palmeiro is scheduled to return to the Orioles tomorrow after serving his 10-day suspension for steroids. But many observers aren't sure he'll come back at all; Congress is still investigating him, some of the Oriol...
The Mario Lopez Experience
We are just six days away from the next undignified gallop toward hipdom attempt by ESPN2, ESPN Hollywood, a show about how athletes and celebrity mix. (Yep.) We'll focus more on the show later, but right now we're gonna talk about co-host Mario Lopez....
Yard Work Upgrades, Eviscerates Peter King
Congrats to the wacky folks at Yard Work, who have revamped their site with a shiny new URL and an archive that could judiciously be called "improved." They blast off the new site with a pretty biting satire of Peter King's Monday Morning Quarterback column, which begins with a pretty fantastic im...
Bob Costas: Hysterical In His Own Mind
Don't know if any of you saw this or not, but everybody's favorite Sports Dwarf In A Suit Bob Costas was a guest on "The Daily Show With Jon Stewart" last evening. It was a bizarre appearance. Our problem with Costas has never been that he isn't smart (because he constantly reminds us that, yes, h...
Now They Are <em>Literally</em> Convicts On The Field
Reason No. 32,452 that people in other countries are infinitely more unhealthy about their sports than we are: Welsh Premier team Carmarthen Town has signed a man who is currently in jail. Craig Hughes, who plays some position called "striker," was banned from attending soccer games for eight year...
Mistakes At Si.com
Interesting note on SI.com right now. On Michael Silver's column is the following rejoiner:...
Set Tivos To "Thug"
For you night owls who just can't handle hearing Bryan Adams on SportsCenter anymore, we suggest tuning in to ESPN2 tonight at 12:30 ET. It's a special show called "It's The Shoes" — part of ESPN2's "Block Party" — with Eagles wide receiver asspain Terrell Owens and rapper Trick Daddy (who, impres...
Oprah Winfrey, The New Lombardi
Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson is notorious for being talented, brash and way-too-loud-mouthed. Kind of like Oprah! OK, not really, but Johnson confesses that the real point of his football career is to figure out a way to make it on Oprah's show. Johnson says:...
Smith's Terror Begins In Less Than Two Weeks
We are but nine days away from the launch of NBA "analyst" Stephen A. Smith's "Quite Frankly With Stephen A. Smith," the new live-studio chat show, or, as we like to call it, "What The Hell Is Wrong With The Treble On This Television?" Smith, whose wide-eyed stare straight into the camera makes u...
ESPN Angers Non-Crack Addict Mayor
From the signs your mayor has too much time on his hands department (and/or is a serious masochist), District of Columbia mayor Anthony Williams is pissed that ESPN isn't taking its road show to the nation's capital. Even worse, he offered to show ESPN bloviator Chris Berman around town....
ESPN Spreads Its Terror Across The Land
Those who were up to watch SportsCenter this morning know that ESPN's already obnoxious "50 States, 50 Days" promotion has begun. The idea, in case it hasn't been sucked down into your soul by now, is that SportsCenter will be at a different location every day for the next 50 days, or pretty much ju...
NBA Draft Predictions: Trying To Piss In The Dark While Handcuffed
As previously mentioned, the NBA Draft is tonight. This, of course, is a completely random exercise with 30 different variables liable to change their minds for no particular reason at any given moment. But sportswriters get bored, so we present the Deadspin guide to mock drafts by people who don'...