sec Page 17 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jose Canseco's Interstellar Trade Idea Will Probably Save Us All
Take a seat and pay attention, everyone. Today, Jose Canseco dropped some knowledge that we should all absorb: If we can control comets, we can control everything. Everything....
Auburn Newspaper Defends Publishing Photo Of Laquon Treadwell's Injury
One of the most crucial and dramatic plays in college football this year also featured a season-ending injury that remains painful to look at. How do you weigh the import of the moment with sensitivity to the injured player? If you're one Alabama newspaper, you put it on the front page of the spor...
The SEC Really Does Benefit From Media Bias In Polls
This past week, four of the top five teams in the Associated Press College Football Poll hailed from the SEC West Division. Nebraska coach Bo Pelini, among others, wondered aloud whether ESPN's ownership of the brand-new SEC network, which launched this year, might be responsible for such a coinci...
Jose Canseco's Fiancée: "Douche Douche Douche Douche Douche Douche"
To understand this story, you need to know three things:...
Jose Canseco Accidentally Shoots Off His Middle Finger
Jose Canseco accidentally shot off his finger with a hand gun Tuesday afternoon, according to TMZ. Canseco's fiancee told the network that the gun went off when he was cleaning it at his home in Las Vegas, and that he didn't know it was loaded. She went on to say that the bullet tore through the bot...
Ole Miss Fans Crowdfunded The Rebels' Fine For Storming The Field
Mississippi beat Alabama on Saturday, and fans tore down both goalposts. It was awesome. But it wasn't cheap. But not to worry—fans have chipped in to more than cover the costs of a destroyed field and a big SEC fine....
According To The NFL, NFL Security Is Incompetent
The NFL has given ABC News a detailed account of the league's attempts to obtain information about the night that Ray Rice was arrested for assault, and it portrays NFL security as a stunningly incompetent organization. As told to ABC News by NFL spokesperson Brian McCarthy, the NFL attempted to obt...
Mississippi State Trounces Texas A&M, Alabama And Ole Miss Up Next
If you're tired of insufferable SEC fans trying to convince you that their perennial bottom-dwellers could run through any other conference, you can say whatever you want about the SEC East this year. The West division, however, is an insane collection of talent. ...
SEC Referee's Day Is Off To A Bad Start
SEC referee Ken Williamson started his day in charge of the Texas A & M-Mississippi State game with disorientation followed by somewhat frightening rage. Simmer down, Kenny!...
Law Enforcement Official: We Sent The Ray Rice Tape To The NFL
A law enforcement official tells AP he mailed a copy of the inside-elevator video showing Ray Rice punching out his then-fiancée to the NFL's security chief, Jeffrey Miller, back in April....
You Need More Bruce Lee In Your Life; Start With <em>The Chinese Connection</em>
The most iconic moment in 1972's Bruce Lee vehicle The Chinese Connection, and maybe of his entire career, comes when he walks into a Japanese dojo with a sign that the Japanese, as an insult, left at his teacher's funeral. He says he'll take on anyone in the dojo, and when one guy steps up, Lee s...
AT&T Stadium Security Guard Is Afraid Of Footballs
Whoa! Hey! What was that!? ...
Tree-Poisoner Harvey Updyke Will Let You Throw A Pie At His Face
Harvey Updyke, best known for poisoning Auburn's famous oak trees at Toomer's Corner in 2010, will be giving Tigers fans a chance at revenge. ...
Kentucky DT Cory Johnson On How Much He Poops: "I Poop So Much"
This is from yesterday, but what kind of operation would we be running if we did not share with you the most urgent news coming out of SEC football? This is Cory Johnson, a recent junior-college transfer, speaking with LEX 18's Alan Cutler about his fluctuating weight. Johnson says he could weigh 29...
Introducing The Three-Point Line Benefited Big Men Most
After the NBA introduced the three-point line in 1979, it would have been be intuitive to assume that guards, who shot a disproportionate amount of the new and more efficient three-point shots, benefitted most from it. But a new study from the Journal of Sports Economics claims that after the three-...
Nick Saban's Press Conference Enlivened By Off-Camera Snoring
Even on a day completely bereft of sports, I can't really think of anything that would have me less enthused than SEC Media Days. So I really feel this dude who can be heard snoring (Or just breathing really heavily? I sincerely hope not.) while Nick Saban drones on about whatever the fuck....
Bryan Lee O'Malley's <em>Seconds</em>: Scott Pilgrim Grows Up (Maybe)
The problem, you would think, with creating the single greatest slacker-nerd fantasy of a generation is how you follow it up. "Get a little older, and draw the ever-loving shit out of it" isn't a bad answer. ...
Everything You Need To Know About Getting A Vasectomy For March Madness
There's a widespread (if unverified) belief that vasectomies increase substantially during March Madness. If you're going to be stuck at home icing your testicles, the thinking goes, why not schedule it around a week you're already blowing off work for the tournament? ...