soccer Page 247 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Italian Soccer Team Takes Giant Dump All Over Sportsmanship
Yes, we know that headline sounds redundant. But check out what Lega Pro (third tier) side Foggia pulled off yesterday. Down a goal with five minutes remaining, a Foggia player went down "injured." As is customary, Gela kicked the ball out to give him a chance to recover. But Foggia rushed a throw...
Here's A Soccer Player Kicking A Defenseless Fluffy Owl In The Face
This is a clip from a Sunday match between Junior Barranquilla and Deportivo Pereira of Colombia's Primara A. The owl, which is apparently Junior's club pet, made it on to the field in the middle of play and Pereira defender Luis Moreno swiftly booted it three meters off the field. Moreno hasn't b...
Rip Hamilton Yelled At Coach John Kuester So Hard The Younger Pistons Were Mortified
Your morning roundup for Feb. 27, the day that Earth's show-business sect finally recognizes all that Queen Amidala of Naboo has done for them, and for all the rebellion....
Soccer Medic Helps Others Through The Healing Power Of Somersaults
Here he comes to save the day. That means Daniel de Sousa Araújo, medic for Brazilian soccer team Comercial-PI, is on the way. This video's from a Copa do Brasil game earlier this week. He takes the time to show off his rather-subpar gymkata moves before tending to an injured player....
The Detroit Pistons Went With A Malcontent-Free Six-Man Roster Last Night
Your morning roundup for Feb. 26, the day San Francisco starts looking for messages in the snow....
MLS Playoffs To Admit More Good Teams, Bad Teams, Possibly Your Grandmother
Getting into the MLS playoffs this year will be about as difficult as securing admission to the dogshit community college down the road from you. That's because the wise men who run the MLS have decided to let two more crap teams into a playoff system that not only confuses foreign players accustome...
Everything Right With Soccer, In Three Minutes Of Incredible Non-Dives
Technically, Barcelona and Argentina forward Lionel Messi dove a few times, in a literal sense, as he was hip-checked, tripped up and otherwise impeded by lesser talents. Problem is, Messi missed several opportunities to flail about to pad his stat sheet. He is the Best Soccer Player On Earth....
Sepp Blatter Never Met A Disaster He Couldn't Exploit
When we named Sepp Blatter one of the 10 worst men in sports earlier this month, we were being kind. Blatter's repugnance extends well beyond sports. He runs FIFA like a Swiss bank, hoovering up billions of dollars and disbursing them in ways that remain as mysterious as they sound dubious. And all ...
Everything Wrong With Soccer, In One Incredible Dive
Technically, Chilean U20 defender Bryan Carrasco didn't dive, as he was definitely struck by the Ecuadorian player. Problem is, Carrasco literally smacked himself in the face with the other player's arm. He received a free kick....
Gay Poles Want Separate Seating At Euro 2012 Games
Rainbow Stand 2012 (aka Teczowa Trybuna 2012) bills itself as the Polish national soccer team's first gay fan club. And who knows, maybe they are. Per the Warsaw Business Journal, members have asked UEFA for separate seating during the Euro 2012 tournament which will be played in Poland and the Ukr...
Caltech Basketball Win Raises Record To 1-310 In Last 311 Conference Games
Your morning roundup for Feb. 23, the day Rahm Emanuel starts cursing at the phrase "staggering unfunded pension liabilities."...
Barcelona Players Tripped Up By Language Barrier
The most amusing thing about this jokey dubbed-over video is that it's probably accurate. Ibrahim Affelay is from Holland, the new signing by Barcelona, potentially a good one and clearly not versed in Catalan. Is nobody studying Dutch in grade school anymore?...
Newspaper Actually Photoshops Out Player To Make Play Appear Offside
We take it for granted that our local media outlets are going to be homers, and that's generally fine. We're fans, and we want to get coverage from our perspective. But no one can complain about Hawk Harrelson after seeing how a Spanish paper airbrushed a crucial player from a photo to make an erron...
Ronaldo Wore Diapers? Sure, Why Not.
The recently-retired legend wasn't always Fat Ronaldo. Way back in 1999, he was simply struggling-with-his-weight Ronaldo, allegedly taking diet pills that forced him to wear adult diapers during games....
Chelsea Won't Be Winning The FA Cup, Either
Rough season at Stamford Bridge for the Chelsea Football Club. The Blues are sitting in fifth place in the EPL after winning the league last year. Then came today, when it looked like they had a decent shot to advance to the fifth round of the F.A. Cup after taking a 1-0 lead halfway into extra ti...
Someone Does A Handball, And Everyone Goes Mental
The Spoiler hasn't felt this sorry for a linesperson since Sian Massey's career was stalled thanks to a couple of old sexists and those well-meaning tabloids with their lovely headlines and ability to get pictures off Facebook....
Goalkeeper Gets Sent Off After 10 Seconds Of Terrible Soccer
Ebbsfleet goalkeeper Preston Edwards was sent-off, but the true villain of the piece is the left-back. No.3 — damn right you should hold your head in your hands....
Grant Wahl's FIFA Candidacy Is Stupid, And That's Kind Of The Point
SI's Grant Wahl has announced his intentions to run for President of FIFA against Sepp Blatter when Blatter's term expires in June. It's a big joke, of course — a man without any executive experience. The sad part is that it's less of a joke than Blatter seeking a fourth term....
Don Mattingly Will Stop At Nothing To Find A World Series Ring
Your morning roundup for Feb. 16, a day after a guy from Texas retired from riding bicycles while wearing tights. Again....
Topless Italian Soccer Player Headbutts Fully Dressed British Coach
Tottenham Hotspur traveled to Italy to face AC Milan in the UEFA equivalent of the Sweet Sixteen today. It was a chippy game which Tottenham won after Aaron Lennon broke away and assisted Peter Crouch on the game's lone goal with about 10 minutes left....