soccer Page 247 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Message From Sepp Blatter On International Women's Day
I suppose we should have expected Sepp Blatter to hoist himself onto a soapbox this morning. It is, after all, the 100th anniversary of International Women's Day, which means it's also a perfect opportunity for Blatter to bleat some of the shameless agitprop for which he's beloved:...

Some Videos Of Football People Weeping And Wailing
The Spoiler is feeling all emotional this Monday, but as we're unable to find our copy of The Notebook, we've decided to reminisce about players and managers, past and present, who've shed salty tears of despair over The Beautiful Game....

Man U Player Suffers "Horrific Injury That Cut To The Bone"
It wasn't quite Lawrence Taylor meets Joe Theismann's leg, but Manchester United's Nani suffered a pretty gnarly leg injury during today's 3-1 loss to Liverpool....

Women Surfers Shouldn't Be Judged By The Beauty Of Their Skin, But By Their Talent On The Board
Your morning roundup for March 6, a day of toeing the "No shark's fin soup, you're cheap" classist line....

German Fan Violence Turns Underwhelming Soccer Match Into Overwhelming Soccer Scene
Today's Bundesliga match between Kaiserslautern and Frankfurt had all the makings of an exercise in excessive boredom. Frankfurt hasn't scored in eight games; Kaiserslautern hasn't won a match in 2011....

Infidelity Mars, Spices Up Dallas Kickball Game
Your morning roundup for March 5, the day after a "terrible guy" felt like a "wonderful fellow."...

Kicking A Fan In The Face Is Eric Cantona's Most Treasured Memory
Cantona, on his famous flying kick of an abusive fan: "I think that maybe it's like a dream for some people sometimes, to kick these kinds of people. So I did it for them. So they are happy." [The First Post]...

Watch LeBron Throw The Ball Right In Chris Bosh's Face, Blow A 24-Point Lead
Your morning roundup for March 4, the day Northwestern students remain engaged in the idea of human sexuality....

Every Last Player And Coach Got Red Carded In A Single Soccer Match In Argentina
Quite a bit of scrapping went down in a recent Argentinian lower-level soccer match between Claypole and Victoriano Arenas. So much scrapping that referee Damien Rubino issued 36 red cards. One was for bad behavior during the halftime break....

Celtic V Rangers Madness — Everyone Goes Crazy!
El Hadji Diouf playing for Rangers against Celtic. What could go wrong?...

Rich Eisen Sets Personal Best In The 40, Still Loses To Slowest NFL Combine Participant
Your morning roundup for March 3, the day NFL lockout talk gets real....

Chelsea Owner Roman Abramovich Relieved To Still Have The World's Biggest Symbolic Penis
Thought we couldn't put a sports spin on the recent revelation that Teodoro Nguema Obiang Mangue, the son of the dictator of Equatorial Guinea, had commissioned a yacht with a movie theater on board? Wrong....

When Life Hands You Torrential Downpours, Make Your Soccer Stadium A Water Park
On Monday, a soccer game between Brazil's Sao Paulo and Palmeiras at Morumbi Stadium was delayed a few hours due to very heavy rain. The fans who showed up early did not let it spoil the party, and treated the 80,000-seat facility like a giant water park for the entire game, which ended in a 1-1 d...

Soccer Player Who Killed Fluffy, Defenseless Owl May Get Jail Time
Luis Moreno, the defender for Deportivo Pereira of Colombia's Primara A who kicked an opposing club's pet owl off the field on Sunday, could get up to three months of jail time for the incident. The owl was treated for traumatic stress at Zoosalud veterinary clinic in Barranquilla, Colombia, but die...

American Brutalizes Canada With Sensational Goal In Jamaica
Nathan Smith, defender from California, robbed Canada of its desire to compete and live on Sunday when he scored this incredible goal during extra time of the 2011 CONCACAF U-17 championship in Montego Bay, Jamaica. The goal broke the 450-minute shutout streak of Canadian keeper Maxime Crepeau, wh...

Italian Soccer Team Takes Giant Dump All Over Sportsmanship
Yes, we know that headline sounds redundant. But check out what Lega Pro (third tier) side Foggia pulled off yesterday. Down a goal with five minutes remaining, a Foggia player went down "injured." As is customary, Gela kicked the ball out to give him a chance to recover. But Foggia rushed a throw...

Here's A Soccer Player Kicking A Defenseless Fluffy Owl In The Face
This is a clip from a Sunday match between Junior Barranquilla and Deportivo Pereira of Colombia's Primara A. The owl, which is apparently Junior's club pet, made it on to the field in the middle of play and Pereira defender Luis Moreno swiftly booted it three meters off the field. Moreno hasn't b...

Rip Hamilton Yelled At Coach John Kuester So Hard The Younger Pistons Were Mortified
Your morning roundup for Feb. 27, the day that Earth's show-business sect finally recognizes all that Queen Amidala of Naboo has done for them, and for all the rebellion....

Soccer Medic Helps Others Through The Healing Power Of Somersaults
Here he comes to save the day. That means Daniel de Sousa Araújo, medic for Brazilian soccer team Comercial-PI, is on the way. This video's from a Copa do Brasil game earlier this week. He takes the time to show off his rather-subpar gymkata moves before tending to an injured player....

The Detroit Pistons Went With A Malcontent-Free Six-Man Roster Last Night
Your morning roundup for Feb. 26, the day San Francisco starts looking for messages in the snow....