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Hirshey: It Should Have Been Mourinho
David Hirshey writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin....

Yzerman Is Our Bitch
So I don't know if you saw this, but... we're kind of a big deal. The latest ESPN the Magazine has Deadspin (well, not really) as the 25th biggest sports story of the year. Not as big as Jason McElwain at #22, but bigger than Steve Yzerman at #26. Sorry, Stevie. That's just the way it goes someti...

We're Going To Wally World!
Someone asked us the other day whether or not our job was stressful. We thought about it for a moment and told them that our job is only stressful when we're not doing it. Doing Deadspin is the most fun thing we do; the only time it stresses us out is when we're away from the computer and terrifie...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Carl Monday Vs. Barbaro
And here we are, the matchup we are personally most curious about, the one featuring the infamous Carl Monday and good ole Barbaro, who would be a late charger if only his hoof would grow. We have been looking forward to this one since this got started....

Special Olympic Perversity In Chicago
We don't mean to be scolding moralists here, but we're pretty sure this is an excellent way to get sent to Hell....

ESPN Has Learned This Post Was Just Written
We were traveling yesterday afternoon — we're back in Mattoon for the holidays — so we weren't able to give this the attention it probably deserved. So allow us to correct that now....

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds
All right, here we are: It's time for the Final Four. We have our ESPN side of the bracket, and then our Masturbator Locator Vs. Horse side of the bracket. All four candidates are worthy. It's time for some tough decisions, people....

At The Garden With Deron, Stephon And The Cabal
So it figures: We go see our first (and likely only) Knicks game of the year, and not only is it their most "exciting" victory of the year, but it's a one that, the day after, even Knicks fans don't really care about. The Knicks had a rare stud game from Stephon Marbury — and by "rare," we mean "we ...

Last Call For All SHOTY Voting
Tomorrow, the finals of the Sportshuman Of The Year tournament begin, and there's still some rather tight matchups. The semifinals themselves will run throughout the holiday season, and we'll continue with the finals on January 4, when we come back from vacation (which we'll also get into later this...

Hirshey's Holiday Week Off
We are sorry to disappoint, but our main man David Hirshey is taking a week off from his weekly windings on the world of the English Premier League. (That's soccer, in case you forgot.) He sends the following explanation/report:...

This Might Be Why They Wear Those Difficult-To-Take-Off Bodysuits
Because we don't quite provide everything you might need to feed your international skiing jones, you might not necessarily have heard of Silvan Zurbriggen, a Swiss skiier who is in Italy for a big slalom event. He was keeping himself busy, apparently; he was arrested for masturbating outdoors in fr...

The First 2006 Baseball Recap Book Is Out
Of all the sports we cover around these here parts, it's probably pretty obvious to you that our favorite, the one that warms our cockles the most, is baseball. We pretty much buy every baseball book we can find, particularly around this time of year, when it's cold and we miss the game the most. A ...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Barbaro Vs. Ben Roethlisberger
We're to our final quarterfinal matchup, with the semis taking place next week in a torrent of voting mania. (Or something.) We encourage you all to vote on the extremely tight Mariotti-Reynolds matchup. First, a reminder of the bracket....

Dan Marino, The Early Broadcasting Years
We'd never seen this old video, of Dan Marino, back in the Len Dawson "Inside The NFL" days, making a verbal flub and kind of getting a little pissy about it. (When you've scared Len Dawson, you've scared the world.) It's from 2000, when Marino was first trying out as a broadcaster — and was, and is...

PETA Is Worried About Shaq's Hands
A few people out there have wondered if the entirely reasonable and in no way dramatically and insanely overstepping in the name of a somewhat noble (occasionally) cause folks at PETA have an opinion on David Stern's decision to be with leather again. Well, they do....

Reeeeeeeeematchhh!!!!!
It was inevitable, it was preordained, it was destined and placed here only to make us happy and the world a better place: Looks like Miami and Florida International, who have a bit of history, are set to butt heads, crutches and Hell 2 Da Naw once again, next year. It's October 6. It's the Orange...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Jay Mariotti Vs. Harold Reynolds
We return to the SHOTY Tournament, with the final two quarterfinal matchups, today and Thursday. Of all the Elite Eight matchups, we think this might end up the closest. (The first two have been runaways, though you can still vote.) First, a reminder of the bracket....

We're Avoiding "With Leather" Jokes, But You May Feel Free
We'd like to thank NBC Sports for using the pictured headline on their site last night, in reference to David Stern acquiescing to the demands of his players to bring back the old basketball, so we didn't have to. It's nice when global corporations do our work for us....

Hirshey: A Game Even Dumb Newbies Could Love
David Hirshey writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin....

USC Wants You To Remember The Alamo
Boy. Not only are tempers still flaring over current BCS issues, but there are still some 2005 grudges that seem to be on the front burner. USC blog Boy From Troi, for instance, couldn't help taking a shot at Texas when the latter's marketing dept. sent out an e-mail promoting the arrival of their...