ti Page 1631 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Best Four Minutes Of Baseball Last Night, Presented In Split Screen
We've put together a split-screen video syncing up the conclusions of both Yankees-Rays and Red Sox-Orioles that we hope the IP crew at MLB is too hungover today to notice. Enjoy....
Why It's OK To Hate Ron Jaworski And Jon Gruden
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Buy Drew's new book, The Postmortal, through here. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....
Jose Reyes Is A Selfish, Gutless, Stat-Padding Quitter (Just Like Derek Jeter)
From the moment Jose Reyes dropped a first-inning bunt single and then checked out of the season's final game, leaving his average at .337 and all but assuring the Mets of the first batting title in franchise history, it was obvious that people who need something to yell about were going to yell abo...
Dan Uggla Celebrated His Home Run Last Night By Dong-Bumping David Ross (Video)
Uggla had just hit a two-run homer off Cole Hamels in the bottom of the third to put the Braves ahead, 3-1. There was a playoff spot riding on this game, of course, so there was reason to be excited. But ... what was that?...
Let's Watch A Dutch Guy Scare The Living Hell Out Of A Chinese Guy On The Subway
This video's called "Chinese vs Brawl Dutch (FIGHT)." Though it's difficult to understand what, exactly, is being said and disappointing how, exactly, they back away from the brink without resorting to violence, it's oddly mesmerizing to see Chinese get in the wrong Brawl Dutch's face....
Swedish Golf Course Hires Hunter To Shoot Two Fairway-Ruining Piglets Dead
"Last night the foraging fun had run its course for two of the eight piglets when they were shot dead by a hunter on the approach to the fifth hole. The whole thing 'took fifteen minutes' according to Ottoson, and it is hoped it will be enough to avoid any more from having to be shot. 'We couldn't...
A Very Quick Correction To A Very Dumb Rick Reilly Column
Rick Reilly writes: "Jersey Rule No. 3: You may not wear a jersey if somebody else in your group is already wearing one. This is also known as The Fedora Rule. No two guys in any group can be wearing a fedora. The second man's fedora must be trashed, crushed or sold. You never saw Sinatra and Dean M...
Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: The End Is The Beginning
It was a frightful beating that gave rise to Deadspin's ongoing search for the meaning of Bartolo Colon—the 38-year-old Yankees starter got knocked out of the first inning against the Blue Jays, surrendering 8 runs (3 earned), an outing so bad it raised questions about the pitcher's very purpose in ...
Watch Bemused Florida Coach Will Muschamp Ask An Analogically Clumsy Reporter "What's A Padawan?"
In journalism school, as far as I know, they don't teach you to begin your SEC press conference questions with "Excuse the Star Wars reference, but..." You're supposed to inquire along the lines of "How do you stop that guy, coach," and "Would you like to score more points in the second half?" Ala...
The David Justice Lookalike Who Bombed Out Of Pro Baseball And Wound Up Playing David Justice In <em>Moneyball</em>
Moneyball popped into theaters on Friday, and it did well, among critics and audiences alike. The movie's impressive with its depiction of that A's team—fake Chad Bradford conjures up Chad Bradford, fake Jeremy Giambi reminds you of Jeremy Giambi, and so on....
There Is An NBA GM Out There Who Doesn't Know How To Use Google
Ever wonder if the men who run our professional basketball teams are as clueless as the men who were running our professional baseball teams (as depicted by Michael Lewis in his 2003 book Moneyball)? There is no definitive answer to that question, yet, but we do now know that at least one NBA GM doe...
Jose Reyes Is One Point Ahead Of Ryan Braun For The NL Batting Title With One Game To Play (UPDATE)
No Met has ever won a batting title, and Reyes is hitting .336, while Braun is hitting .335....
This Evening: Let's Watch 10 Stadium Demolitions In A Row
Your p.m. roundup for Sept. 27, the day we learned red wine wasn't the blood-pressure cure we thought it was. H/T to Robert for the video. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Watching The Bengals Can Be A Fate Worse Than Death, Says Dying Bengals Fan
"Accepting that the end was near, the funny grandfather and great-grandfather said earlier in the day there was an upside to death: at least he wouldn't have to watch another Bengals loss." [Sports Grid, via Cincinnati Enquirer]...
The Curse Of Dopey "Curse Of The Bambino" References, And Other Dumb Things About The Red Sox's Stretch Run
Harvey Araton of the New York Times, reporting from Baltimore, sets the new/old standard for witless hackery today:...
Growing Up On NFL Violence In A Violent Neighborhood
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....
Atlanta Braves Have Had A Rough September, According To Newspaper's Middle School Line Graph
This is a real graph that accompanied a real article in the real Atlanta Journal-Constitution today. The Braves lost to the Phillies 4-2 last night, and are now just a game ahead of the Cardinals for the NL wild card—all thanks to this carefully-plotted "September Swoon." It's really exciting that t...
This Evening: Big Papi, Little Pee-Pee
Your p.m. roundup for Sept. 26, the day we learned about spontaneous human combustion. Photo via Mocksession; H/T to Brad. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Marvin Lewis Guarantees A Victory Over The Bills This Week, Because Why The Hell Not?
From the Bengals' head coach's press conference earlier today:...
This Week In Unintentional Dong Submissions
Writes tipster Fighting Polish, this is "a picture of the Get Well card my 11-year-old niece made for my mother. That, of course, is a 'Thermometer-man.' Interesting to note that Thermometer-man has a thermometer in his mouth. Also, he looks exactly like a big, hairy-headed dong."...