ti Page 1693 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

No One Watched The World Series
The World Series tied for the lowest TV ratings ever. And don't blame small markets, because Dallas and San Francisco are the fifth and sixth largest media markets in the country....

"Then I Felt My Testicles Switch Places": One Man's Twisted Story About His Balls
One day, seemingly out of nowhere, something terrible happened to Evan Jacobs's testicles: They rotated. Then came the pain, the marijuana, the doctor's finger, the testicle display, and the compression shorts....

When World Series Riots Go Wrong, People Get Hit By Cars
Here's some footage that's going around today. In it, a rowdy crowd celebrates the Giants win with vandalism and a bonfire. Then a car comes through the crowd and a mob swarms the car and driver until police show up. Holy shit....

For The First Time Ever, San Franciscans Are On Top Of A Muni Bus, Not Beneath It
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Because He Can, Bear Grylls Jumps Onto A Moving Helicopter And Calls It An Alley-Oop
Bear Grylls is doing a three-part series of short videos for Degree Men deodorant in which Mark Messier "coaches" him through challenges from professional athletes. In the latest installment, Kevin Durant tells him to do a heli-oop. So he does....

The San Francisco Giants Are World Champions
The Giants beat the Rangers 3-1 in Game 5 tonight for their first World Series title in 56 years, and Timmy's locks are about to get a well-deserved champagne lather....

Declan Sullivan's Death Could Cost Notre Dame A Lot Of Money
Patrick Rishe, a writer for Forbes' SportsMoney blog, has calculated that Declan Sullivan's death could cost Notre Dame close to $30 million in compensatory and punitive damages....

Heat Strokes, Games 3 & 4: Are We There Yet?
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....

Football Beat The World Series In The Ratings. Huh.
As Deadspin's resident crazy old coot railing against things not being like they were back when I was a lad, I've been asked to comment on a regular season NFL game beating a World Series game for the first time ever....

Zach Galifianakis Will Probably Smoke Even More Pot On TV If California Legalizes It
On Friday's Real Time, Out Cold funnyman Zach Galifianakis smoked a joint during a panel discussion of California's Proposition 19 ballot initiative. In related news, Fox News's Margaret Hoover probably listens to a lot of Miles Davis on her days off....

If You’re Not Rich In America, You Are Fucked
There's an election coming up tomorrow, and I haven't paid any attention to it because, at this point, whatever asshole they stick in office will be no different from the asshole they stuck in there before....

"Thriller" On Ice Much Better Than "Thriller" In Filipino Prison
You know, agility-wise. We're not sure why someone would perform the "Thriller" dance on the ice, but when you think about it, why wouldn't you perform the "Thriller" dance on ice? [Puck Daddy]...

Tottenham’s Benoit Assou-Ekotto Rips Into "Dirty Prostitute Shagger" Rooney
Tottenham Hotspur defender Benoit Assou-Ekotto, best known for his laid-back, "couldn't give a f**k, tbh" approach to professional football, has laid into his Premier League peers, singling Wayne Rooney out for special attention as a "dirty prostitute shagger."...

Somebody Is Desperately Seeking Tim Tebow's Poo
Tim Tebow's pro team had a game across the Atlantic today, so I have no idea why the president of a portable-shitter company is talking about rooting around for Tebow dung. But Scott Taylor of Advanced Sanitation is....

Texas H.S. Football Team Loses 12-OT Game
With a playoff berth on the line, the Nacogdoches Dragons and Jacksonville Indians were tied at 28 at the end of regulation Friday night. Final score: 84-81....

Did Concussion Earlier In The Month Lead To A High-School Football Player's Death?
A Kansas City-area high school football player died on the field Thursday night; Ron Stiles said his son Nathan "suffered a concussion in the school's homecoming game earlier this month ... he had been cleared to play Thursday."...

"Celtic" Delonte West Gets Into A Locker-Room Fight With Von "Who?" Wafer
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

More Stories About Terrifying Hydraulic Lifts From Football Videographers
Earlier, we brought you Anonymous's account of videotaping football practice from a scissor lift under circumstances similar to those that precipitated Declan Sullivan's death. Readers sent in their own experiences with the perils of videotaping from lifts....

The Day I Thought I'd Die On A Scissor Lift: What It's Like To Do The Job That Killed Declan Sullivan
Notre Dame would like you to believe that the death of Declan Sullivan Wednesday was a tragic accident but an isolated one, a sad case of bad weather conspiring with terrible misfortune. And that would be wrong....

This Is What Four Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Do In The Bathroom Together
Years of standup-comic banter has been deemed irrelevant now that we have seen what happens when women go to the bathroom together. (Yeah, I don't know what's going on here, either. It has something to do with Roto-Rooter.) [CNET]...