ti Page 1864 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Moons Over My Prom-Y
For those reading who are teachers, it is that time of the year to volunteer your chaperoning services to one or more of your school's proms. There, your job is to make sure no one's hands fall below the belt line for illegal slow-dance fondling or, you know, make sure no students are having babies ...
But Where Are Rich Garces' Tits?
And...we're off. Welcome to today's first plummet into non-newsworthy despicability intended for the sole purpose of making your work day more amusing....
DeShawn Stevenson Rocks The Michael Vick Jersey
There are several possible explanations as to why DeShawn Stevenson was wearing a Michael Vick jersey and an Atlanta Falcons' hat at a Cleveland hotel before Game 5 of the playoffs. Somewhat likely: It's a statement against his least favorite movie, Turner and Hooch. Most likely: His OJ Simpson jers...
Maria Menounos Will Bring Her Swarthy Greek Thunder Side Out
And here's some media-related news that will only be fun for those of us who enjoy TV journalist Maria Menounos' exemplary, hard-hitting work on the Today show and Access Hollywood. From an email:...
NBA Playoffs: A Tuesday Night Viewer's Guide
Basketbawful is here to ease you into a nice, warm, Tuesday night bubble bath of NBA action. Forget Calgon. Let me take you away and guide your viewership of tonight's playoff action....
How To Get Free Seats Close Enough To Touch LeBron (But Please Don't)
In 2006, Milwaukee's Drew Cieszynski attended a game in every major league baseball park. OK, even though it's pretty cool, it's also been done. But who has achieved the rare MLB-NBA road trip combo? This year, Cieszynski caught a game at every NBA arena, somehow managing to keep a full time job in ...
Media Approval Ratings: Jason Whitlock
It sure does seem like a long time since Jason Whitlock gave that famous interview to The Big Lead. He really worked for ESPN that long? Oh, ask him about Mike Lupica and Scoop Jackson....
Time To Panic, Celtics Fans
You know, "panic" probably isn't the right word to use in the headline right there. Panic implies a comprehension of what's happening to you, anticipation of what horrors might be coming. That's not what's happening in the Celtics-Hawks series right now. Everyone — on both teams — seems so shocked ...
About Last Night
What you missed while closely examining the upholstery ... • NHL: Take that, Canada ... Flyers use second-period heroics to take 2-1 series lead over Montreal. • NBA: Larry Brown is back, this time coaching the Bobcats. You'd think that this is the one story that Larry Brown Sports would be all over...
NBA Playoffs: A Monday Night Viewer's Guide
Got a case of the Mondays? Don't worry. Toronto versus Orlando: Game 5...
A USC Football Player Got A Low Test Score? What?
"If your Wonderlic score is lower than the age of consent in your state, you may be a redneck." I'm not all that convinced that IQ testing is all that relevant when it comes to drafting NFL quarterbacks, but I will say this: If I needed a partner to diffuse a bomb, I'd pick LSU Louisville quarterbac...
Corey Lynch Offers Divine Intervention To The Bengals
Marvin Lewis has the seemingly insurmountable task of changing the Bengals' from one of the most clink-happy and character-deprived football teams in league history to something ... better. Chris Henry is gone, but the scars still remain. The attitude and atmosphere has to change in 2008, so the Ben...
Support Competitive Eating As An Olympic Sport!
We know, we know: None of you care about competitive eating as much as we do. That still doesn't make this plea to make competitive eating an Olympic sport any less inspired....
Media Approval Ratings: Michael Wilbon
Watching the NBA Playoffs the last week or so, it's clear Michael Wilbon has appropriately recovered from his mild heart attack last January. And did you know that his wife gave birth just two months later? Nice work, Wilbon!...
"Big Dick Bandit" Now A Raven
In case you thought the departure of Brian Billick would bring a new age of sterling character to the Baltimore Ravens, you are most definitely wrong. Among the more interesting second day picks came with two of the Baltimore Ravens' three 3rd round picks. With the 7th pick of the third round, they ...
Bron-Shawn Basketball Beef Gets Hip-Hop Glaze
With Game 4 of the Wizards-Cavs series about to tip off in the Verizon Center comes the news via The Washington Post's (Boooooooo!) Wizards Insider blog that the overcooked rivalry between LeBron James and DeShawn Stevenson has extended into the hip-hop arena. It all started with Queen James waving ...
Kerwin Danley Takes His Umply Lumps
Home plate umpire and crew chief Kerwin Danley took a 96 mph Brad Penny fastball to the jaw in the 4th inning of the Dodgers 11-3 win over the Rockies last night. The game was delayed 18 minutes and Danley had to be taken off the field in an ambulance. A Dodgers spokesman said Danley lost consciousn...
Message To This Kid's Future Defense Attorney: Blame Name or Haircut
This unfortunate youngster, other than being forced by parental duress to sport the bowl cut, was born unto a couple of deranged Spurs fans. How unhinged, exactly? Instead of buying a team photo or something to encapsulate their love for the team, they decided to put the whole roster into their kid'...
1st Round, Eighteenth Overall: Ravens Select Joe Flacco
Joe Flacco came from a bad neighborhood. Audubon, New Jersey, is rougher than the Little Rock with East St. Louis piled on top of it. Flacco graduated from Audubon High School, which is so rough that there are medal detectors in the faculty lounge, where even the math teachers are pumped up muscle m...
1st Round, Sixteenth Overall: Buzzsaw Selects Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie
You better adjust the tracking on your VCR if you want to watch game tape of Rodgers-Cromartie. Tennessee State games are taped using the surveillance cameras at the Stop & Rob across the street. "The tape is not real clear. You have to find him. This reminds me of an older time in scouting," accor...