ti Page 1920 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Elijah Dukes Is Not Subtle About Voice Mail
Tampa Bay Devil Rays outfielder Elijah Dukes is off to a splendid start this year, and just watching him play, you can tell he has superstar potential. Hell ... he could very well be the next Brett Myers!...

Well, We Suppose This Ruins Pitino's Master Plan
Yes, friends, it is a sad day in Celtics land. (It's a sad day in Grizzlies land too, but nobody cares about the Grizzlies.) All the hopes and dreams of Bill Simmons — who should have plenty to write about over the next five years — and those Golden Tee-playing Boston fans went up in a poof of lotte...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while hiding from the flying robot police ... • MLB: New York Mets at Atlanta. The most humid rivalry in sports. [TBS] • NBA: Draft lottery, at Secaucus, N.J.; Western Conference finals, Utah at San Antonio, Game 2. You know which one you care about watching more. [ESPN] • NHL: Western...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11:15 a.m. Baseball with Joe Morgan: How about, just once, cooking with Joe Morgan? • 1:30 p.m. SC Special, Draft Lottery: We assume this is the NBA Draft, because the alternative is too scary to contemplate. • 2 p.m. NASCAR with Terry...

Italy Is Gaining On Us? Inconceivable!
One thing we know about yacht racing: When you change your dock-out song and still lose, it was not meant to be. For the first time in 24 years, there will be no U.S. team in the Louis Vuitton Cup final. Luna Rossa of Italy beat the Americans to clinch the best-of-nine semifinals, 5-1. Yes, we have ...

Welcome, Jezebel: Turn To The Worship Of Her God Baal
The classy, bombastic lovely ladies seen here are the editors of the newest site from our benevolent benefactors at Gawker Media, Jezebel, which launched today. The basic premise of the site is mapped out in a manifesto about the five biggest lies that women's magazines spew. Personally, we've alway...

You Just Can't Keep Chris Henry Down
You know, we're starting to think that Bengals wide receiver Chris Henry might have a bit of a self-control issue....

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. Baseball with Steve Phillips: If every baseball fan chipped in a couple of bucks, couldn't we match the Yankees' offer and keep Clemens out of baseball? • 2 p.m. NBA Insider John Hollinger: If David Stern had ever been in a fight...

Clinton Portis Has Ron Mexico's Back
Ron Mexico might be going through a particularly difficult time right now, but it's worth noting that he has one significant booster: Deadspin Hall of Famer Clinton Portis. He'd just like you and your ilk to leave Mr. Vick and his puppies alone....

Bengal Arrested ... Blah Blah Blah
I would've gotten to this sooner, but I thought it was probably a good idea to wait a few hours, see if any other Bengals got arrested, and then combine them into one post. Alas, they put together an unprecedented 12-hour streak of good behavior....

We Will Cherish Him, And Keep Him Warm
You might remember, from a couple months ago, that famous eBay auction in which we discovered that Barbaro lives on forever through snack food. To remind, from the seller:...

Who Will Win the 2007 Scripps National Spelling Bee?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

Interleague Play Is Back, If Anybody Notices Anymore
We've never had a major problem with interleague play. It's possible this is because our Cardinals get to play the Royals six times a year — and boy could we use the help — but mostly, it's because the game has been so twisted and pretzeled over the last decade that, hey, what's one more switch? Peo...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. Fantasy League injuries: So are these real injuries, or ones we make up? • Noon. NBA with Chris Sheridan: Yeah, that Western Conference Finals party you're planning? If it's Jazz-Spurs, I'll be too dead to attend. • 3 p.m. AFL ...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while figuring out how to spend your Schrute bucks ... • NBA: All right people, move along, show's over. Nothing more to see here. Pistons 95, Bulls 85. • MLB: Eric Hinske (!), Julian Tavarez (!!) lead Red Sox doubleheader sweep. • NHL: OK people, gather 'round, plenty to see here. S...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 1 p.m. NCAA Lax w/Quint Kessenich: Ever accidentally swallow the ball? • 2 p.m. MLS with Fire's Chris Rolfe: Does it concern you that your team is named after a large disaster? • 3 p.m. Fantasy Baseball Focus: My holy quest to obtain t...

What To Do While Bored At RFK
Last night, at RFK Stadium in DC, the Washington Nationals hosted the Atlanta Braves in a game that counted an official total of 21,258 fans. (To which we say: Yeah, right.) With the upper deck almost entirely empty — we know how this goes — one dastardly fan decided to try to construct a word out o...

Hey Everyone! Let's Go Sailing!
America's Cup season is here, so why aren't youngsters crowding the docks for autographs and affixing posters of Oracle CEO Larry Ellison on their walls? We have no idea. Jut take a look at Tuesday's Louis Vuitton Cup semifinal series action from Spain:...

Lastings Milledge, Scaring All The White Mets Fans
In the annals of ridiculous Lastings Milledge photos, this one, from the New York Daily News blog, is a rather classic one: It's like if Outkast met Cliff Huxtable....

How Do You Spell "P-L-E-A-S-E L-O-R-D G-O-D S-T-O-P T-A-L-K-I-N-G?"
Sometimes we wonder if we are too hard on ESPN. Sure, collectively, they seem to have sucked the very life out of sports, packaging schtick and corporate pablum into a stew of impossible-to-digest soulless muck. (And, unlike the rest of us, they mix metaphors!) But they're still just individuals, ou...