tsa Page 16 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Everything You Never Really Wanted To Know About Cauliflower Ear
Today’s column is about fucked-up ears....
French Gymnast Wants To Become An MMA Fighter
MONTREAL, Canada—In Rio, Samir Ait Said, a leading gymnast for France became famous for something an elite athlete never wants to become known for—suffering a horrific injury on live TV....
Trash, Like Feelings, Can Become A Sad Wet Fire When Buried
Today’s column is about mysterious trash fires....
Vols Brawl
Georgia beat Tennessee 41-0 in Knoxville today, an ass-whupping that paled only to those apparently being dispersed among spectators....
Why Running Sometimes Makes You Shit Blood
Today’s column is about bloody shits....
Gymnast Botches Turn On Beam, Kind Of Invents New Skill
ANAHEIM, Calif.—Jordan Chiles is a 16-year-old gymnast from Washington that you’ve probably never heard of. She was too young to vie for a spot on last year’s Olympic team so this year is her first time competing at the national championships in the senior ranks. And when she was competing on balanc...
How To Fuck In The Woods, And Other Survival Tips
Today’s column is about enjoying the great outdoors....
This ESPN Fantasy Football Auction Segment Is ... Yikes
I don’t know if this tone-deaf fantasy football auction segment that ESPN2 aired yesterday, with its galling resemblance to a slave auction, means that nobody involved in its production saw or understood Get Out, or if they’ve never read a history book, or if they’re all just really dumb, nor do I k...
Welcome To Meat Sack, A Guide To Sports-Related Body Horror
The ecosystem of the human body does not want for complexity, nor do the myriad of idiot things we inflict upon it. This is perhaps nowhere more apparent than in the world of sports, where athletes willingly submit their bodies, like monks to their vows, in pursuit of Larry having a nice, drunken ni...
Multiple Ejections After Massive Brawl Between Giants And Nationals
Hunter Strickland drilled Bryce Harper with an eighth-inning pitch that sparked a brouhaha between the Giants and Nationals today in San Francisco....
French Gymnast Who Suffered Horrific Leg Break In Rio Is Making His Comeback
Less than a year after the Olympic Games in Rio, Samir Ait Said, the French gymnast who suffered a gruesome leg fracture during the men’s qualifications, is back to training....
Four T'd Up As Warriors And Thunder "Brawl"
Stephen Curry, Draymond Green, Semaj Christon, and Russell Westbrook all drew technical fouls as a fight between the Warriors and Thunder erupted near the end of tonight’s first half in Oklahoma City....
Report: Three Oregon Ducks Players Hospitalized After Grueling Workouts
The Oregonian is reporting at least three Oregon Ducks football players are in the hospital following a series of “grueling strength and conditioning workouts” last week at the university. Multiple sources told the paper that players had to finish the same workout this week, with one witness saying...
Every Episode Of <i>It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia</i>, Ranked
It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia has been on the air since 2005, and somehow, a show about five terrible idiots who hatch insane schemes and treat each other with unabashed disdain is probably going to end up as the longest running live-action comedy series in TV history. The show is just getting i...
Report: The Packers Still Have A Hole In Their Wall
In terms of forced explanations of why the New York Giants—and specifically Odell Beckham Jr.— are out of the playoffs, boat trips are tired. A hole in the wall that serves as a visual representation of the receiver’s struggles with self-control is officially in....
Missouri, Georgia Coaching Staffs Fight
The Missouri and Georgia coaching staffs got into an old-man brawl at the end of the first half of today’s game between the Tigers and Bulldogs in Athens, with referee Karl Hess even inserting himself into the ruckus and shoving people in what his mind we’re sure passes for an attempt to restore ord...
Vols Brawl
Tennessee scored a big Music City Bowl win over Nebraska tonight, but that wasn’t enough for some Volunteers fans, it seems:...
Soccer Guy Loses Mind After Game, Suddenly Thinks He's In A Kung Fu Movie
Look closely and you can see the exact moment that Mumbai City striker Thiago Cunha, mere moments after losing on aggregate to Atlético de Kolkata in the Indian Super League semifinals, completely forgets that he’s in a soccer game and instead becomes convinced that he’s the star of some martial art...
The More We Learn About The Mixed Martial Arts Athletes Association, The Shadier It Seems
As pretty much everybody saw coming, things aren’t going so well with the Mixed Martial Arts Athletes Association—the latest attempt at forming a sort of fighters union—and former Bellator founder and CEO Bjorn Rebney’s presence in the group is already threatening to ruin it....
Woman Claims Fox Sports Arizona Broadcaster Melted Down Over Minor Car Accident
Fox Sports Arizona broadcaster Todd Walsh flipped out at a woman Wednesday after a car accident in Arizona and attacked her gender and race, according to the woman’s account on Facebook....