tsa Page 52 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while having so many people to thank, wow, my incredible cast, I couldn't have done it without you, my director, my agent who believed in me when nobody else did, my parents, who always supported everything I've always done, the studio, oh my god I know I'm leaving someone out, and all...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your parrot comes back as a potato chip ... • NBA: Seattle at Chicago. Go Cubs! Oh, sorry; my mistake. Carry on. [WGN] • NHL: Pittsburgh at Philadelphia. Why no team named the Ice Bears? [Versus] • Soccer: UEFA Champions League; Real Madrid CF vs. SS Lazio, at Madrid. Taped. Isn't t...
This Is Pretty Much Why God Invented Sports Bars, We Reckon
We don't know what hell like, or who exactly is there (aside from all the sports agents). But here's a pretty good guess: There's nonstop karaoke, the only beverage is Tabasco sauce and at the top of the hour everyone gets hit in the face with a custard pie. That sounds about right. But at a sports ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you cuddle with your vital organs ... • NFL: Baltimore at Pittsburgh. We preferred this matchup back when there was no AFC. [ESPN] • NHL: Philadelphia at New York Rangers. Petr Prucha picked a peck of picked peppers. [Versus] • NBA: Rockets at Mavericks. More excitement than fifty W...
About Last Night...
What you missed, thanks in part to those damn singing condoms... • NCAA Football: Arizona State travels up to Oregon, dies of dysentery. • NASCAR: Carl Edwards overcomes adversity, rookie drivers to win NASCAR's minor league circuit. • MLS: New York England Revolution tax New York Red Bulls without ...
Why, I'll Show You Rumormongering, Mr. Reporter Man
In the column inches of metro daily paper on a peaceful Saturday morning, somewhere between the high school box scores and soft news on retired athletes, you wouldn't expect to find a rant about blogs....
Teewee Wistings, How Womantic
First, the College Football: • 12 noon — Wisconsin at Ohio State [BTN ... sorry, Comcastic Columbus!] • 12 noon — Indiana at Ball State [BTN] • 12 noon — Purdue at Penn State [ESPN] • 12 noon — Iowa at Northwestern [ESPN2] • 12:30 p.m. — Kansas State at Iowa State [Versus] • 2:30 p.m. — Navy at Notr...
Colts and Pats Match-Up Poised to Tilt Axis of Earth
The Indianapolis Colts/New England Patriots death-match hype is reaching its condition critical stage, as every single person on the planet tangentially-related to either one of those regions or to sports writing has to have an opinion about it. They must. This is the game of the millennium, you see...
Night Falls On Death Valley
The handsome young gentleman above is the biggest freshman to hit Baton Rouge since Glen Davis. His name is Mike VI and tonight the two year-old will make his debut as LSU's official mascot. He's big, he's photogenic, all the women want to pet him, and all the men want to be him. He's Louisiana's an...
Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Oklahoma
ESPN enjoys to alliterate Saturdays with "S" words — which are words that begin with the letter "S" — to glorify the weekend's slate of intense games. Separation Saturday comes foremost to mind. But with all the upsets that occurred in the Top 25, perhaps yesterday should be known as "Suck It" Satur...
The Gay Mafia Invade The Mothership
Oh, hello there. We, the fine gentleman from Kissing Suzy Kolber, have been charged with guiding you folks through this, the very first weekend of the NFL season. And we could not be more excited. Not only do we get to watch football, we also get to rush to the computer every five minutes to do HTM...
About Last Night
What you missed while your editor picked up the Daily News and stood, silently ... • College football: NCAA decides to adopt Arena League rules on Thursdays. Louisville 58, Middle Tennessee 42. • MLB: In which I refuse to make the "Ethier said than done" or "It doesn't get any Ethier" play on words ...
In America It's Deviant, In the UK It's Cheeky
It turns out that Wayne Rooney isn't Manchester's only star player with a serious jonesin' for the pros. I can hardly blame the guy for setting up an orgy, he must have a ton of pent up energy what with not playing due to suspension and all, but did the over-sexed superstar (/fuckhead) really have t...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while contemplating the universe ... • NFL, preseason: Three fumbles, one interception and a sack. Yep, the Bears' Rex Grossman is right on schedule. • MLB: Brewers back for a share of first and a handful of those Spanish peanuts ... • Little League: World Series, rained out, which m...
What to Watch Tonight
What to watch as you finally come to (25 cent beers will do that to you)... • 7:00 pm — US Championships in Gymnastics [NBC] • 8:00 pm — Sunday Night Football: Giants at Ravens [NBC] • 8:00 pm — Sunday Night Baseball: Cardinals at Cubs [ESPN] -Metschick Ever say something over a year ago in the comm...
Television! Teacher, Mother, Secret Lover
• 1:00 — Golf: Ricoh Women's British Open, Final Round from St. Andrews [ABC] • 1:00 — Golf: WGC Bridgestone Invitational, Final Round from Firestone [CBS] • 2:00 — NASCAR: Nextel Cup: Pennsylvania 500 from Pocono Raceway [ESPN] • 2:00 — Movie: Fletch [AMC] • 3:00 — Tennis: Andy Roddick vs. John Isn...
Sergio Garcia Retains Lead At Carnoustie; Enjoys a Michelob
The last time The Open Championship strolled through Carnoustie Sergio Garcia looked like a an overwhelmed high school player who struggled to break 90 both days. Eight years later he's back in Scotland and he's just one round away from becoming this year's wire-to-wire champion. There's no question...
Who dares challenge Pennsylvania's status as the country's marble-playing powerhouse? Certainly not you, I hope. The Keystone State is home to 66 national marble champions. Here's something else I learned today: One who plays the game of marbles is known as a "mibster." Please discard your Word-of-t...