tsa Page 49 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

For Those Girls About To Mosh, We Salute You
Just cuz. I've been mesmerized by this all day. [YouTube]...

Bengals Cheerleader Files Suit Against The Dirty.com Over Horrid STD Rumor
The woman, identified as "Sarah J" in The Dirty's post and "Jane Doe" in the lawsuit, claims the website libeled her when they published an email suggesting her ex-boyfriend was a disease-riddled scuzzbot who probably infected her with something scabby....

IceGators Coach Defends His Stick Throwing Temper Tantrum
Brent Sapergia says throwing all his team's equipment on the ice wasn't a stunt. He was just really, really mad! (Says the refs weren't looking out for his players.) Tough, but fair. [Puck Daddy]...

You'd Lose Your Mind Too, If You Had To Coach Hockey In Louisiana
Brent Sapergia only lasted two games as coach of the Louisiana IceGators, but he made them count—getting thrown out of both and making himself internet famous with an epic, bench-clearing temper tantrum....

Marat Safin Says Agassi Is "Stupid", Should "Shut Up"
Tennis-playing dude Marat Safin isn't exactly broken up over revelations that fellow competitor Andre Agassi was addicted to crank. If he feels so bad about it now, Safin says, then why not give back all that money he didn't win?...

So, You Want Some Nasty Injuries With Your Hockey? I Got Your Nasty Injuries For Ya
The esteemed Wysh a/k/a Puck Daddy has a rundown of the Top 10 Most Brutal NHL Injuries of the Last Decade. Let's have a look-see, shall we? (Clint Malarchuk figurine sold separately)...

Yes, That Was Pat Sajak And A-Rod Groping Jeter's Buttocks
Alex Rodriguez's magic tush massage could not overcome the haunting Sajak voodoo gaze as the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim staved off the Yankee gorilla trouncing for one more day. Something called Jeff Mathis is today's hero....

The Learning Curve: Phinally Philly
This segment is called "The Learning Curve" where you, young blog proprietor, will get a link to your new site on Deadspin. Any and all questions you may have about being a successful blogger will (hopefully) be answered....

Mark Whicker Has Left The Yard Before
The year was 1991. Journalist and ex-Marine Terry Anderson had just been freed after nearly seven years of captivity in Lebanon. Seven years is a long time. Luckily, a columnist named Mark Whicker was around to put it in perspective....

Unfortunate Dog Dies Ironic Death
The CEO of Richmond SPCA, a very outspoken critic of local boy Michael Vick, lost her family dog to kidney failure after he was left in the backseat of her car for four hours. Uh boy.... [Times-Dispatch/MidwestVoices(via)/700 Level]...

Insensitive NFL Sells Brett Favre Dog Jerseys!
OMG, you guys! Can you believe the Minnesota Vikings are such cold heartless bastards that they would profit off the pain of animals by selling personalized dog jerseys! It's almost like they don't care how ridiculous your pets look!...

Welcome To The Suck
So we have Viking fans storming Winter Park. We have ESPN following Brett Favre's black SUV via helicopter....

Phillies Still Dawdling On Halladay, Just In Case Happ Or Drabek Is Next Halladay And Not Next Mike Grace
The Phillies were all but guaranteed to land the Greatest Pitcher Ever at some point this weekend, but Blue Jays' GM J.P. Ricciardi's now justifiably hard-balling. Impasse!...

Billy Mays Dead At 50
"Billy Mays here!" Not anymore. Chad Ochocinco was wrong. This is worse than 9/11. Now let's all watch his ESPN360 commercials and weep gently. [TBO]...

Michael Jackson Dies. Chad Johnson Says It's "Just As Sad As 9/11."
The LA Times is saying King of Pop Michael Jackson died today after suffering a heart attack. He was 50. Because this is a sports blog, here's a video, via NESW Sports, of Jackson playing one-on-one with Michael Jordan. RIP....

Let's All Jump Into Puddles
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

A's Fan Gets $500K For Being A Douchebag
Attorney scores a settlement from the A's after a lawsuit claiming gender discrimination for not getting a breast cancer hat on Mother's Day. Expect upcoming lawsuits against Curves, gynecologists, and child birth. [NBC Philadelphia]...

Another Belichick Son Will Experience The Joys Of Alcohol Education Classes
The home life at the Belichick household may become a little turbulent now that 17-year-old Brian Belichick was busted for underage drinking at Gillette Stadium during the NCAA Lacrosse Championships....

The Hunkification Of Mark Sanchez Begins
No one has any idea when or if Mark Sanchez might quarterback the New York Jets, so if you're going to take advantage of his god-given manliness to sell some magazines get on that now....

The L.A. Times Pens The Mother Of All Steroid Columns
Here it is, folks. Served up piping hot by Kurt Streeter in Sunday's Los Angeles Times — the platonic ideal of a steroid-outrage column....