ump Page 61 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Donald Trump Was A Youth Baseball Shithead
The Washington Post has a long, revealing feature about the childhood of Donald Trump, an extremely rude ham hock. We’re most interested in the section that deals with Trump’s childhood love of baseball, and the description of what kind of player he was....
Paul Emmel's Head Cracked Open By Bat
Jefry Marte lost the handle on his bat late in tonight’s loss to the A’s, and it delivered an enormous gash to umpire Paul Emmel’s head. Emmel left the game, leaving a shorthanded crew to call the final out....
UK Pols Believe Russian Hooligans Who Put Two England Fans Into Comas Were Working On Putin's Orders
The British government believes Russian hooligans who beat the hell out of England fans in Marseille—putting two of them into comas—were acting at Vladimir Putin’s command as part of his “hybrid warfare” campaign....
Big Ben Says Trump Full Of Shit; Did Not Endorse, Will Not Speak At GOP Convention
Ben Roethlisberger is scrambling in the pocket as the Steelers quarterback denies Donald Trump after the Republican candidate claimed he had the Steelers quarterback’s endorsement and planned to have Big Ben speak at the GOP convention....
Donald Trump Plans Tom Brady, Ben Roethlisberger, Dana White To Speak On His Behalf At GOP Convention
If Donald Trump gets his way the GOP convention will feature Tom Brady, Ben Roethlisberger, and Dana White speaking on the Republican nominee’s behalf rather than the usual string of politicians....
Idiot On The Field Invades NBA Finals [UPDATE]
Click through for his political statement:...
U.S. Soccer Boss Hints Trump Presidency Could Cost U.S. The World Cup
Donald Trump—one of the gremlins from Gremlins, but racist—is most likely going to be the nominee of the Republican party. As outlandish as his political takes are, and as favored as his likely opponent is, there’s a legit shot he becomes the next president of the United States. One effect of a Trum...
Donald Trump Doesn't Know Shit About The Bay Area
Vulgar olive loaf Donald Trump is hitting the campaign trail in California in advance of the state’s June 7 primary. A good way to appeal to your constituents is to show that you’re “one of them” by feigning nominal interest in their sports teams. If you do this, though, you should have a working se...
Umpire Mike DiMuro Forced To Leave Game After Taking Foul Tip In The Face
Mike DiMuro left today’s Red Sox-Blue Jays game and underwent a concussion protocol after a second-inning foul tip drilled the veteran umpire square in the face....
Donald Trump Caught In Major Fabrication
Human meat sculpture Donald Trump has long embraced his unique brand of reality on Twitter, but the Republican presumptive presidential nominee took it to a major level last night in attempting to express his appreciation for one of his patrons:...
Anti-Trump Republicans Asked Mark Cuban, Bizarro-World Trump, To Run Against Him
Fearful that a self-promoting TV star billionaire without an iota of political experience could become president, GOP elder statesmen apparently reached out to, um, Mark Cuban to run against Donald Trump, the Washington Post reports....
Curt Schilling Publishes Entertaining Endorsement Of Donald Trump
Meme enthusiast Curt Schilling has fulfilled his destiny, not merely endorsing Donald Trump but publishing a vigorous and detailed 1,500 word screed on his personal website explaining why he’s doing so....
Why Is This Ump Kicking Dirt Onto The Plate?
Today’s bizarre video comes courtesy of a Texas Bi-District Playoffs game between Texas High School and Whitehouse High School. After a Texas High player mashes a homer, it sure looks like the umpire runs over to kick a bunch of dirt on home plate....
David Ortiz Held Back From Ump After Striking Out With Bases Loaded
Red Sox coaches had to restrain David Ortiz after his outburst following a ninth-inning strikeout with the bases loaded in a game the Yankees went on to win, 3-2....
Argentina Follows Mexico's Lead, Uses Donald Trump To Troll America
We’re beginning to learn that Donald Trump quotes about the impending ruination of America are great fodder for chopping up and serving back to us in the form of troll bait. A Mexican TV station started the trend last year, and now Argentina’s TyC Sports has followed suit....
These Are The Worst Celebrity Exercise Videos
We are truly blessed that there was a time period in which many famous celebrities cashed in with poorly executed workout videos. We are even more blessed that World Wide Interweb compiled the worst celebrity workout videos it could find....
Does An Intentional Walk Ruin A No-Hitter?
Okay, so before I get into the Funbag, some quick appearance news. I’m gonna be at this big Towson sports career speaker series on draft night. It’s at the Greene Turtle (CLASSY), and open to the public. Also, next month, I’m gonna read the first couple of chapters from The Hike over at the Howard C...
Donald Trump: "Leave Tom Brady Alone"
Your never-too-frequent reminder that Tom Brady considers Republican front-runner Donald Trump “a good friend of mine”...that Brady proudly displayed a Trump hat in his locker and said “that would be great” if Trump wins the presidency...that Brady does not like answering questions about his support...
Trump, Hitler, James Earl Ray Nominated For New Elementary School Name
The Austin school district decided last month to rename Robert E. Lee Elementary School, and opened the nominating process up to the public. In the end, 228 names were suggested; Donald Trump got the most nods, with 45. (“Robert E. Lee” came in second.) Here are some other noteworthy nominees from t...
Rex Ryan Introduces Donald Trump, A Man Who Has Also Failed A Lot In New York, At Rally
Bills head coach Rex Ryan showed up at Donald Trump’s rally Monday in Buffalo; it would be nice to think that the two joined forces by bonding over their important fathers giving them a step up in their careers. In Ryan’s introduction, he expressed admiration for Trump showing the courage to say wha...