w Page 5039 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ice Cream Does Not Belong On Your Face, Kid
Seriously, why is this kid at the Italy-Brazil game rubbing his ice cream bar on his face? Not to sound like a busybody, but where are his parents? I think the state may need to get involved here. [YouTube]...

Twitter Causes Stephen A. Smith To Completely Unravel And Clarify Obsessively
I imagine this is what it must have been like for the poor Philadelphia Inquirer editor who received Stephen A.'s column via Blackberry. Somebody get SAS television or radio work fast, or else he might destroy Twitter....

Sidney Crosby's Wild Stanley Cup Orgy
I know this is every man's fantasy, but does Sid the Kid know where that Cup has been? Wrap it up, buddy. [Sports Crackle Pop, via TheScore]...

Breaking: North Carolina Natives Prefer Ol' Roy To Coach K
Roy Williams has a higher in-state approval rating than Mike Krzyzewski, but here's the shock statistic: Only 14 percent have an "unfavorable opinion" of K. Must be that we (part-time) North Carolinians put country first. [Under The Dome, PPP]...

Harold Reynolds Won't Embrace OPS
Now that Joe Morgan is telling tales 'round the national campfire, who out there is left to make specious, proudly ignorant arguments about the value of baseball statistics? Batter up, Harold Reynolds!...

This Is How You Know The U.S. Open Didn't End The Way Most People Wanted It To
Seconds after Lucas Glover snatched his wife into a victorious embrace, we received three emails from readers with screengrabs of her pit sweat. I'm surprised Dan Jenkins didn't Twitter about it....

FAVRE. FAVRE. FAVRE. FAVRE.
Florio hints that Vikes may have already signed him, but are holding the announcement until July 3rd to reduce media overload. Best way to bury the Favre story? Have Artie Lange accuse Joe Buck of jizzing on his chest. [PFT]...

<em>Moneyball</em>'s Deep-Sixed
Break out the baseball puns! Columbia has dropped Steven Soderbergh's Moneyball adaptation like an overvalued, arbitration-eligible pitcher after a career year. Why, it's as if producers made a running, 20-foot backhand flip to cut down the movie at the plate....

Yankees-Marlins Fan Brawl Reveals Truth Of The Human Condition, With Punching
YouTube is filled with grainy cellphone videos of drunken bleacher brawls, but few capture the drama, action, suspense, and heartbreaking childhood trauma of this donnybrook from the Yankees-Marlins series. It's like the Citizen Kane of stadium fan fight clips....

Brian Collins' Waco Job Has Gone Boom (Update)
Just two days after Bob Costas used Brian Collins' signature catch phrase, Busted Coverage published an item pointing out that Collins' days as a Waco newscaster might be over. We can confirm that Collins' gig has, indeed, been dynamited....

Joe Morgan Clarifies One Fib, Possibly Tells Another
As you know, Joe Morgan, the human sic, told a bit of a stretcher during last Sunday's broadcast. Yesterday, he clarified the matter in a way only Joe Morgan could. By maybe lying again....

The Trials of Willie, The Inflatable Dry-Humping Shark
Willie, the mighty Tiburón, is the air-assisted mascot of a popular junior soccer team in Colombia. Unfortunately, Willie's enthusiasm occasionally gets the better of him and he recently got suspended for disrespecting an opposing team. With his crotch....

U.S. Open Should Begin Any Day Now
After four days of interminable, Noah's Ark-like rain, it's my understanding that the US Open golf thingy will actually start sometime today. Oh, they already started—and stopped—the fourth round in the darkness last night? How lucky....

Talk Like An Egyptian
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Artie Lange's Post-Buck Interview Round-Up
Plus, Stern's odd little shout-out to Tommy Craggs ("I think he's from Miami") at the 9:20 mark here. 11 years later, Lange's firebombing is still not as awkwardHoward's on the ill-fated "Magic Hour."[Bob's Blitz]...

Pointless Sunday Gallery: When In Doubt, Lead With Roy Hobbs
Barbecue, La-Z-Boys, dessert, good fathers, seminal moments in pop culture and really, really dreadful fathers. It's the Father's Day edition of Pointless Sunday Gallery. Except this time, it has a point. Sort of?...

Lance Armstrong Takes On The Wall Street Journal, Lance Armstrong Tweet-Reports
Last month, Lance Armstrong boycotted the media, speaking directly to his fans in 140-character chunks. He tried to break the ban by writing a letter to The WSJ, but they "butchered it," and instead, he printed it on his blog....

@DanJenkinsGD Can Haz Cheeseburger
On a semi-related note, Emeritus on Jenkins: "It's kind of unbelievable Twitter existed without him. Proves my theory: Had he started a blog before Deadspin, I'd be flipping burgers." Amen. Easily the star of this year's washed-out Open. [Washington Post]...

What We Learned About The 2009 Wimbledon Champion
"Every tennis lover would like, someday, to play like Federer," Philippe Bouin tells Cynthia Gorney of The New York Times Magazine for this week's cover story. "But every man wants to be Rafael Nadal. Which is different."...