w Page 5211 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Donte Stallworth's Alien Friend Nicco
Donte Stallworth can comfortably be considered the "other" wide receiver on the Patriots. He doesn't have the blow-up-a-game talent of Randy Moss, and he doesn't have the electric, sensuous charisma of the sex bomb that is Wes Welker. It takes a bit for the man to stand out. It takes something drama...
So Did Someone Slap A Restraining Order On Randy Moss, Or Not? (UPDATE: Yep!)
One of the fun parts of the Internets is that once you have introduced something to the series of tubes, called "posting," it never really goes away even if you try to delete it. (Which is why this still exists.) So WDBO Radio in Florida's "scoop" this morning, which they then deleted from their sit...
Solving The Mystery Of Eli Manning
OK, let's get real now: Eli Manning is really one game away from the Super Bowl? We thought he was more into squash. What's going on?...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after celebrating Wikipedia's seventh birthday ... • College basketball: Ohio State at Michigan State (7 p.m., ET); Kentucky at Mississippi State (9 p.m., ET). It's ESPN Super Tuesday! Only, you know, without so much Mitt Romney. [ESPN] • NHL: Montreal at New York Islanders (7 p.m., ET...
Politician On A Mission To Rid Toledo Of Any And All Peckers
So, big sports news here in Toledo. After the minor league hockey team went on hiatus, they're returning soon, along with an arena football team, in a brand new sports arena. And here's where you start caring, because the new football team might be called the Toledo Peckerheads....
Work For The Knicks, In The Worst Capacity Imaginable
You know what would be a great job? Being the guy who has to clean up all of Isiah Thomas' messes, and then try to explain them away to a growling, surly New York media. That's exactly what we told our mom we wanted to be when we grew up....
An Illustrated History Of Roger Clemens' Boorishness
Those Congressional hearings are going on today, but we have a sneaking suspicion that none of you care about them — frankly, we don't either — so we're gonna focus on the type of discourse we enjoy considerably more: Pure, unadulterated hatred of Roger Clemens....
Little People Wrestling At Northwestern
The video above is an advertisement for Half Print Brawlers, which advertises that "midgets bleed for your enjoyment." Well, we suppose that's truth in advertising....
The Stars Come Out For The Australian Open
For the majority of her yearly tournament appearances, 17-year-old Austrian tennis star Tamira Paszek manages to keep the twins indoors, as they say. (OK, no one says that but me). But when the Australian Open rolls around, things change. She's out there, Jerry! And she's lovin' every minute of it...
Ask Jeeves, The Butler Did It
The NBA Closer is written by our Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or shuffling around in his revolutionary sleeping bag, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast....
About Last Night
What you missed while talking like Jack Bauer ... • College basketball: Despite missing injured starters Levance Fields, Mike Cook, Ladainian Tomlinson and Philip Rivers, No. 15 Pitt still beats No. 5 Georgetown, 69-60. • NBA: Kobe scores 48, not counting Alaska and Hawaii, as Lakers beat SuperSonic...
Setting The Table For Two More Rather Important Games Of Foot-Ball
We'd actually forgotten about this, but now that both teams are meeting again in the AFC Championship Game, it's worth reminding everybody about: LaDainian Tomlinson totally hates the Patriots....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you maneuver Tank Chair into viewing position to watch ANYTHING YOU DAMN WELL PLEASE ... • College basketball: Georgetown at Pittsburgh (7 p.m., ET); Oklahoma at Kansas (9 p.m., ET); Gonzaga at Pepperdine (midnight, ET). Screw sleep; let's watch Pepperdine! [ESPN] • NHL: New York Ra...
The Epic Tale Of Borders Porn Purchasing
Apparently, that issue of Penthouse we told you about last week has hit newsstands. We haven't seen it yet, but it's at least at Borders. But be careful, if you head out to purchase it....
Get A Job With ESPN Through The Comments
So you know how pretty much every page on ESPN.com has a "conversation" element anymore? (Except, of course, for Simmons' columns. But that's probably your/our/all-of-our fault. Sorry.) Well, that includes the ESPN Job Postings page, which leads to some awfully amusing comments....
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning for its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
Shiny Happy Isiah Laughing
The NBA Closer is written by our Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or filing important documents, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast....
The Crying Game
There are times when you expect a grown man to cry; like when they confiscated all of Bluto’s booze in Animal House. But this is kind of weird. Watch here as Terrell Owens weeps openly during Sunday’s post-game press conference, all because the mean media types have been picking on Tony Romo....