w Page 5416 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
To Watch Tonight ...
What light through yonder window breaks? 'Tis Doritos, and this picante sauce is the sun ... • College FB: Tennessee at LSU. The only group of Volunteers who are not welcome in Louisiana. [ESPN2] • MNF: Chiefs at Broncos. If you have any idea what John Madden is talking about, please let us know. [A...
Paris Hilton And Ross Verba: Our Lucy And Ricky
We're not saying that Paris Hilton's already decumbent standards are getting somehow lower or anything, but one would think that when you're on the cover of Vanity Fair, you'd be able to party with a relatively high class of athlete. Nope: Hilton was out boobing it up in Las Vegas last weekend wit...
Fighting The Real Enemy: Fuchsia
From the Professors With Way Too Much Time On Their Hands Department: A professor at the University of Iowa has been receiving Internet threats after she claimed that the Iowa football team's propensity to color the locker room pink was sexist and homophobic. First off, we'd like to tell everyone ...
NFL Roundup: Kickers Soak Up All The Drama
• Like everyone else who is prone to breaking their spine whenever there's a stiff wind, we've always had an affinity for kickers. So when Cowboys bully tackle Larry Allen went after former XFL kicker Jose Cortez after he missed an extra point — to be fair, Cortez got a little lipp — we cringed th...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while declaring a thumb war with your Iraqi neighbor ... • NFL: Patriots 23, Steelers 20. Once again, mighty Steel Town reduced to tears by hobbit-like Adam Vinatieri. • MLB: Yankees, Red Sox both win to stay tied for division lead; will decide things in Wrestlemania VII. • NFL: Beng...
Week In Deadspin: Is Manny Wearing A Ron Mexico Jersey?
• You thought Ryan Farnsworth was bad. You thought Bronson Arroyo tarting it up with college students who aren't his wife was bad. You thought that A-Rod and his wife living as closet swingers was bad. Until you have seen Manny Ramirez teaching people how to dance, you ain't seen nothing. NOTHING!...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as Rafael Palmeiro testifies that you gave him steroids ... • MLB: Red Sox at Orioles. Bronson Arroyo, you goofy looking wingnut — Boston needs you now more than ever. [NESN] • College FB: Iowa State at Army. If you don't watch this game, the terrorists have won. [ESPN2] • College FB: ...
Bill Simmons Brings It All Back Home
Well, we know why Our Boy Bill Simmons was sans column all week; he was saving it for his new NFL column, which clocks in at a frighteningly healthy 3,200 words. It's the usual Simmons fare; we get guest appearances by The Godfather, Andrew McCarthy and MTV's "Cribs."...
Blogdom's Best: Washington Nationals
More than any other sport, baseball lends itself to individual blog obsession. Every Major League Baseball team has several blogs obsessed with chronicling the ins-and-outs of everything. Deadspin salutes these modem-addled souls and proudly presents Blogdom's Best, given to the most outstanding b...
Giants Fans Remain Most Erudite In Sport
We once went to a St. Louis Cardinals-New York Yankees game at Yankee Stadium with a smattering of fellow Cardinals fans. There was a rain delay, and our group — all dressed in loud red, of course — watched the Bleacher Creatures amuse themselves, treating the benches like Slip-n-Slide's and parti...
Derek Jeter ... REVEALED! (Uh, by CBS.)
After its rather incomprehensible look at Miami Dolphins hemp advocate Ricky Williams last week, "60 Minutes" continues to scrape the filthy underbelly of the sports world with a cutting look at Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter. You won't believe the dirt they've uncovered. It's Derek Jeter LIKE YOU'...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while your JetBlue flight was circling LAX for three hours ... • MLB: Yankees fail in determined attempt to choke, go game up on Red Sox. • MLB: Willis bats seventh, earns pitching victory. Those wacky Marlins. • Presidents Cup Golf: Tiger Woods does not play well with others....
Do Not Spam Ozzie Guillen
In case you missed it from Sports Illustrated earlier this year — or its reprinting in the Chicago Daily Southtown — Chicago White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen has a publicly available email account: OzzieGuillen13@ hotmail.com. Now that the White Sox are in danger of a historic collapse, he says he'...
To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch if and when your pit bull decides to relinquish the remote ... • PGA: Valero Texas Open. Bart Bryant, we have come to topple you from your lofty pedastal. The thrill ride is over. Prepare to give up the Valero Texas Open trophy! [ESPN] • MLB: Orioles at Yankees. Big Stein smells a divi...
Jay Mohr: Comedy's Skip Bayless
We'll admit it: We don't really understand those columns that failed movie star/failed TV star/failed game show host Jay Mohr is writing for SI.com. They're not funny, but they're not really incisive about sports either; they just kind of hang out there, like a faded balloon (or a Marge Schott bre...
Sorry. We're Not Done With Mitch Albom Yet
Even though we wrote about it recently, we still can't stop thinking about that time Mitch Albom made up a bunch of stuff and turned it in as a column. Like, we're still supposed to read him after that....
Rickey's Gonna Do What Rickey's Gonna Do
Great, great, great news: Rickey Henderson could finally make it back to the majors. It might not necessarily be in the way we'd prefer — we'd like to see Rickey a top some sort of wild animal, an elephant or giraffe maybe, as the United Nations holds a special session up in a skybox in his honor;...
Blogdome: Don't Make White Sox Fans Angry
• When you're in the middle of a frantic pennant chase, it's very, very bad when your cable provider can't even figure out how to put your games on TV. [South Side Sox] • We repeat: ESPN was encouraging people to send Lance Armstrong's dog a get-well card. We are not kidding about this. [The Mighty ...
America's NBA Team: NOOCH!
Even though we still hadn't quite gotten used to not calling them the Charlotte Hornets anyway, the New Orleans Hornets have now officially changed their name again....
And So It Begins ...
Prepare for the gnashing of teeth and rending of garments: The Yankees have passed the Red Sox in the American League East. With only 11 games left to go — and an ominous three-game set at Fenway to end the season — we have yet another chapter of Yankees-Red Sox drama. Please do not accuse of East...