war Page 218 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
War Emblem Isn't Interested In Breeding; Not That There's Anything Wrong With That
You've probably seen this by now, but, alas, it's still great. War Emblem is tired of the dating scene. Take this farm, for instance; everyone here is such a phony. He'd rather stay in his stall and curl up with a nice Dee Mirich poem, if you want to know the truth. The race horse, who won the Kentu...
Place Bets On The Next NBA Stoner
This has certainly been covered elsewhere — most excellently by TrueHoop - but we really can't get over the "Josh Howard is a terrible person for smoking weed" meme. As Henry Abbott put it, "We're not alarmed that one young person smoked pot. We're alarmed that anyone admitted it." Fitting, not even...
Costas Now Airs Tonight, 10 P.M. Eastern. What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
All right, as you might have heard, we'll be appearing live on Costas Now tonight on HBO, at 10 p.m. ET. Theoretically, this will be a roundtable discussion between ourselves, Costas, the outstanding writer (if not necessariliy sabermetrically inclined) Buzz Bissinger and Cleveland Browns wide recei...
1st Round, Twentieth Overall: Buccaneers Select Aqib Talib
Talib blew off his scheduled visit with the Cowboys last month. Mario Manningham blew the Cowboys interview off at the Combine. Now I hate the stinkin' Cowboys as much as any kid who grew up a snowball's throw away from Veterans Stadium, but since when do NFL prospects blow off the Cowboys? They're ...
1st Round, Fifth Overall: Chiefs Select Glenn Dorsey
The big question in March was whether Dorsey had super-secret-surgery on his balky knees. How secret surgery even possible? I can't get a hemorrhoid removed without six referrals and a signed affidavit from the president of my insurance company. But somehow one of the top NFL prospects can sneak in...
Where, Uh, Whoa, Amazing Highs Happen
Dominating the headlines this Saturday is the shocking (shocking!) admission by the Mavericks' Josh Howard that he, like every one in the NBA who isn't J.J. Reddick, smokes trees in the off-season. Also: baseball players take steroids and politicians cheat on their spouses....
Kenneth Keith Kallenbach Finally Gets His Wings
Howard Stern fans will know Kenneth Keith Kallenbach for his lifelong membership as one of the "Wack Pack" and his odd, disturbing, unfunny bits as the stoner kid with the big dreams that would never amount to anything. A Philadelphia area native and Phillies fan, Kallenbach was one of those "comedi...
Remembering Howard Cosell, 13 Years Later
Howard Cosell died 13 years ago today. You will have to forgive us, and most people who read this site who are younger than us, but Cosell is more a legend among our generation than he is anyone who has a tangible relationship to the way we remember sporting events. Cosell was last on "Monday Night ...
Ric Bucher Gets No Big Love From Angry Jazz Fans
ESPN's NBA sideline yapper Ric Bucher will most likely not be invited to any Church of Latter Day Saints picnics anytime soon. During an ESPN radio interview with Colin Cowherd, Bucher suggested that the reason Utah was one of the the toughest places to play was because their fans are so pent-up and...
Epic Fail In Oakland (And Dirk Is A Space Monster!)
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who would do anything for love, but he won't do that. No, he won't do that. When he's not memorizing Meat Loaf lyrics, you can find him karaokeing them at Basketbawful. Enjoy! Hey Warriors...what's that on your face? I'll tell you. It's egg. And mud. And th...
NHL POST-VIEW: NHL Awards, Facts And Fiction
With the regular season over and done, NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski hands out the hockey hardware — officially and unofficially....
Under The Brazilian Rainbow
Via Sports By Brooks comes this seemingly tall tale about these terrifying little fellers , who are supposedly part of Brazil's all dwarf soccer team, the "Gigantes do Norte."Even though this squad is not even close to being gigante in physical size, they are so in spirit, apparently....
Pat Jordan, Canseco "Square Off" On Howard Stern
This morning, on The Howard Stern Show (a.k.a., the show you used to listen to all the time until either: a) he left for satellite radio, which you don't get; or b) he got divorced from his wife, draining the show of its subtle, mostly hidden pathos), Jose Canseco was a guest. And Pat Jordan, author...
Which Golden Boy Will Get Wooden?
Storming The Floor looks at the Wooden Award ... if they dare!...
About Last Night
What you missed while blessing the Phillies' balls ... • MLB: Santana, Mets begin quest for world domination by annexing Florida Marlins, 7-2. • College women's basketball: No soup for North Carolina; LSU reaches Final Four. • College men's basketball: Stanford to lose more than 14 feet of Lopez bro...
Do LA Teams Have The Refs Hypnotized?
Another look at the last play of that UCLA-Texas A&M game that you may not have seen. I know that the rule of thumb among college basketball officials is that if a shooter is hit with two or fewer arrows during the last 30 seconds of play, then you should "let the players decide the game." Now, if ...
ESPN Visits Can Lead To Later Visits From The NCAA
We've never actually been to Bristol, Conn., but we'll confess to being somewhat curious about a tour of the offices. Heck, apparently mascots and professional athletes hang out there all the time; that sounds fun! But careful, young basketball recruit; visiting Bristol can put your eligibility in q...
What's Creepier Than A Draft Combine? How About A Junior High Draft Combine?
You know what youth football has always been missing? Creepy draft combines! Honestly, for too long we have not had the opportunity to nail down and discover the top physical specimens at the age of 12. But worry not!...
Man's Ashes Have More Fun Than He Ever Did
Dear tiny infant Jesus, or as our brothers in the south call you, "Jezus," please welcome Big George Helms (pictured here) into your Heavenly kingdom. But first, kindly bear with us as his remains take a couple of laps at Las Vegas Motor Speedway. Then its over to the KFC drive-thru, and then straig...