washington Page 142 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Clinton Portis' Craziest Costume Yet
Other Clinton Portis costumes have been deep, terrifying glimpses into the most cavernous regions of his soul, a tiny peek at the scary child within, peering out into the world, hoping it's not raining anymore. But this, his most recent one, however, is the most horrifying at all: A monstrous look...
Birds get their claws back
CAW. CAW. Or, you know, whatever kind of a frightening noise a cardinal might make......
Bro Sweets Will Juice You Up
Clinton Portis was back yesterday with yet another fractured segment of his personality, this one somewhat sweeter than the past ones, literally even. We proudly introduce "Bro Sweets," Clinton's most recent tortured mental sliver....
We're Sure Bud Selig Is Very Depressed Now
We're always wary of people who are obsessed with Google-bombing — the practice of making sure when you search for, say, "Tom Brady" on Google, you get a link to something like Mexican goat-fisting, or whatever — but some disgruntled Washington, D.C. residents have decided to go after MLB commissi...
Portis Becomes Depressingly Self-Questioning
Ladies and gentleman, we present to you, after a one-week hiatus for Thanksgiving, Redskins running back Clinton Portis' newest creation: "Reverend Gonna Change," with those pretty crazy teeth and hair and the whole thing. On our scale, this ranks above "Dollah Bill" but behind "Dr. I-Don't-Know."...
Polls: You Love You Some Sheriff
Well, the readers have spoken, and in yet another trouncing — we never have any close polls around here, which we suppose is our fault — your favorite Clinton Portis costume is Sheriff Gonna Getcha, with 38.1 percent of the vote. (We think it's the Led Zeppelin shirt; impossible to resist it.) Sec...
Picasso And Ron Artest Meet, One Year Later
We think the folks at Washington Wizards obsessive site Wizznutzz are certifiably bonkers, but we mean that in the best possible way. We meant to hit this last week, but on Friday they reposted their brilliant Picasso-inspired piece of art called "Aubernica", a dramatic surrealist rendering the f...
Vote: Which Is The Best Portis Alter Ego?
For those of you who haven't been paying attention to the gradual, meticulous mental breakdown of Clinton Portis, the Redskins running back has been dressing up as a new "character" — and, Method-like, staying in character during interviews — for each media conference every Thursday. (It is to Por...
20 Years After Theismann And LT
WSJ's The Daily Fix alerted us to anniversary that, like just about everything does anymore, succeeded in making us feel old: Today is the 20th anniversary of Lawrence Taylor's brutal hit on Joe Theismann, breaking his leg and ending his career. (The Washington Post has a fantastic story about thi...
Clinton Portis. Clinton Portis. Say It With Us Now.
If it's Friday, it must be time to check in on the weird shit Clinton Portis came up with yesterday. We've documented Portis' antics extensively, and he did not disappoint yesterday with his new character: "Dollah Bill." This character's a little less inspired than "Dr. 'I Don't Know'" and "Sheri...
Clinton Portis Still Selling Crazy, Man
In case you thought Redskins running back Clinton Portis was becoming more sane as the weeks went by rather than less, you can relax. We proudly present his newest concoction: "Sheriff Gonna Getcha."...
Clinton Portis' Methodical Meltdown
That guy right there is Redskins running back Clinton Portis, who is slowly limping toward madness, right before everyone's eyes. This week, before last night's win over the Eagles, Portis announced that his previous character, Southeast Jerome, had died and now he was Dr. I Don't Know. Who is Dr....
Michael Jordan's Sudden Inability To Speak
We have such huge blog crushes on the maniacs at Wizznutzz that it's somewhat embarassing to us and to our family. We love it muchly when they rip on Michael Jordan, like they did in this maddeningly brilliant post, but we've just discovered, via Mr. Irrelevant, their best find yet....
Blogdom's Best: Washington Redskins
It might not — yet — have the online fanaticism and cachet of baseball, but the NFL and its fans are starting to catch up in the world of team-devoted blogs. To this end, Deadspin salutes these modem-addled souls and proudly presents Blogdom's Best, given to the most outstanding blog for each NFL ...
The (Gasp) Michael Jordan Backlash
True Hoop brings up something we've been noticing in recent years: People are finding it acceptable to trash Michael Jordan. In retirement, it's safer to take jabs, we guess....
NFL Roundup: Portis' Head
• Contrary to popular belief, Redskins running back Clinton Portis was not doing an impersonation of Yankees center fielder Bernie Williams chasing a fly ball while doing that cartwheel in the end zone yesterday. Good guess, though. • We're not saying that Cincinnati was getting a little too excit...
NFL Roundup: Some Pretty Skunk Weed
• Ricky Williams had six more yards yesterday than he's had droning "60 Minutes" profiles about him in the last year. So you know. Fortunately, that eight years is still about 50 less than the interviews Esquire writer Chris Jones has given about smoking pot with Williams. Maybe Ricky will catch u...
Blogdome: Free The Hockey Bloggers
• Tampa Bay Lightning decide that they, and their sport, are as popular as they could possibly be and refuse press passes to team blogger. [Off Wing Opinion] • Speaking of Tampa, a Devil Rays blogger is so excited about his team's prospects, he's actually quoting Corey Hart. [Drays Bay] • The histor...
Etan Thomas Gets His Dylan Thomas On
Left-wing sports blogger Dave Zirin praises Washington Wizards forward Etan Thomas for speaking out against President Bush's handling of the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Thomas has long been beloved in the black community for his activism, and in a speech, he said he agreed with Kanye West's asse...
Blogdom's Best: Washington Nationals
More than any other sport, baseball lends itself to individual blog obsession. Every Major League Baseball team has several blogs obsessed with chronicling the ins-and-outs of everything. Deadspin salutes these modem-addled souls and proudly presents Blogdom's Best, given to the most outstanding b...