Clearing The 4 o'clock Table...

• Cleveland 9, Oakland 7. If you watched this one, you're a diehard Browns fan, a diehard Raiders fan, or a person with severe emotional problems, and I'm worried about you. Let's get you some help. • Bengals 41, Detroit 17. Even Chad Johnson knows that it's bad form to celebrate the mundane accomplishment of scoring against the Lions. It would be like congratulating yourself for getting up and brushing your teeth in the morning. • Cowboys 7, Redskins 35. If it weren't for the existence of the Philadelphia Eagles, the Cowboys might've won the award for saddest single game performance of the year. Is there an ESPY for that? In a game so big, that's almost unbelievable, especially for a Parcells-coached team. Be ashamed, Cowboys. All day long, I could tell that Troy Aikman was about to cry.