we Page 527 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Florida International University's Own Commercial Shows Students Drinking Wine In Class
Your morning roundup for Dec. 21, the day we learned dick jokes don't always fly in Wisconsin. Photo via Mocksession. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Here's Video Of The Goal Line Stopping The Florida Panthers From Tying The Coyotes
In their game against the Phoenix Coyotes tonight, the Florida Panthers were called for a season-high seven penalties. Yet, there they Stephen Weiss was, with a penalty shot that could tie the game with 24.5 seconds left. He tried to go five-hole, as many do. And the puck got as far as the goal li...

This Is What You'll Look Like If You Refuse To Let Go Of A Police Officer's Groin
Add Frank Slowik's face to the list of tonight's remarkable shoplifting-involved mugshots. The Chicago Sun-Times says that Johnny Law "found about $1,000 worth of stolen seafood and meat" in Frankie's car, but it's the run-up to the meat discovery that's important. To wit:...

Good Lord, These FIU Fans Are Drunk
ESPN has a Beef 'O'Brady's Bowl crowd mic in the middle of a section of enthusiastic FIU fans. Here's that audio channel isolated during a controversial spot in the second half of a tied football game. Eventually the fans stop using language entirely and start communicating in grunts. [ESPN]...

There's Something Truly Special About One Of These Shoplifters's Mugshots
Korin Vanhouten and Eldon Alexander — you decide which is which — totally got charged with stealing makeup, energy bars and batteries from a Utah supermarket the other day. What, no lotion basket?...

Watch Jose Canseco Call Someone "Human Feces"
There are so many questions surrounding Jose Canseco's latest cry for SHOTY recognition. Why does the paparazzi still follow him around? How did he manage to take three lovely ladies home with him the other night? Is he any less of a gentleman for getting the door for only one of them? What's a re...

Chad McGhee Has Risen Up Against President Obama And Government Itself
Now that the Knox City Greyhounds season is over, Chad McGhee has turned his attention to matters besides Texas high school six-man football. Here, he takes both a moral and political stand against the POTUS and affiliated pagans who have declared war on the Lord. In these War on Christmas times, ...

It Wouldn’t Be Christmas Time Without A Lady Hoodrat Brawl At The Mall, Now Would It?
This little slice of Americana comes to you from the King of Prussia Mall, right off the Pennsylvania Turnpike about 20 miles west of Philly. There's a "Rock Bottom Restaurant & Brewery" there. A fitting name....

Today In Sexual News From Sandusky, Ohio
"PERKINS TOWNSHIP, Ohio- A Sandusky woman was arrested on Sunday afternoon after she allegedly beat her husband because he refused her sex. ... According to the report, after a day of shopping and a stop at a local bar, Vera and Harold Baaske returned home. Harold told officers that Vera wanted to ...

The Rangers Tossed Yu Darvish The Most Money, Dmitri Young Is Still Skinny, And More Hot Stove News
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!!...

Former Bears WR Willie Gault Is Being Accused Of Securities Fraud
A member of the '85 Super Bowl shufflers, Gault is one of six people allegedly connected with a scheme to falsely inflate the stock price of a company that makes heart-monitoring equipment. Smooth as a chocolate swirl. [Bloomberg]...

Lawsuit Will Claim Monta Ellis Sent A "Pretty Disgusting" Cellphone Pic To Warriors Employee
Per the Contra Costa Times:...

How To Avoid Counterfeit Tebowing: A Visual Guide
If not for planking, Tebowing would go down in history as this generation's silliest physical obsession, joining past actions like the Charleston, the Macarena, and streaking. Despite the fad's (now waning) popularity, there still appears to be some confusion as to the proper technique or how to re...

Ryan Grant Says The Only Formula For Beating The Packers Is "Us Making Mistakes"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Grant believes that the Packers lost, not that the Chiefs won....

NBC Reporter Was Charged With DUI, Supposedly After A Party At The Home Of Jerry Sandusky's Lawyer
TMZ is reporting that Jay Gray, an NBC News correspondent, was arrested and charged with DUI near State College, Pa., last week. The website also says Gray was cited after leaving a party at the home of Sandusky's attorney, Lawyerin' Joe Amendola. Gray and other reporters "vying for an exclusive in...

Gifts For People Who Have An Opinion About Tim Tebow
Nobody puts the "Christ" in "Christmas" like America's greatest football phenomenon. Don't stop with Denver Broncos gear—Tim Tebow is much more than just an athlete, as the bio of "Timmy" on the Tebow family ministry's website makes clear. Here are a few ideas to help your favorite Tebower get close...

Jerry Sandusky's Adopted Son Was Once Arrested For Repeatedly Calling Someone An "Ass-Licker"
Jerry Sandusky has six adopted children. One of them is Matt. He's a Second Mile kid who burned down a barn as a teenager and attempted suicide as a foster child in the Sandusky home in 1995. Plenty has been reported about Matt's unstable behavior, which includes several stalking and harassment inci...

Detective Who Investigated Jerry Sandusky In 1998 Says "There Was Enough Evidence" To Press Charges
As far as Ronald Schreffler is concerned, he did his job. Schreffler has worked for the U.S. Department of Homeland Security since 2006, but he spent 33 years with Penn State's university police. Thirteen years ago, he was working as a detective for the campus cops when a woman came forward with a ...

If You're Ready, We Now Have A Photo Of That Pooped-In Hockey Glove
To be clear, what you are looking at is not Dave Bermingham's glove right after fellow adult league hockey player Zung Nguyen defecated in it following a fight. What you are looking at is Dave Bermingham's glove a week later, still pregnant with feces....

Machines Don't Fall Down Dead: How Rock'em Sock'em Robots Came To Be
Before Mortal Kombat arrived to satisfy my prepubescent need for button mashing, there was Rock'em Sock'em Robots, the first game I ever played where the objective was decapitation. Here's how it worked: You controlled one of two punching plastic androids—the Red Rocker or the Blue Bomber—by pushing...