x Page 885 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

For Sale: Tiger Woods Sex Tape: $350,000
That's what Mistress # +/- 11, Devon James, claims is the cost for 67 minutes of filthy coitus between her and Eldrick (and a third party) from 2008. She claims if Vivid doesn't buy it, she'll release it independently. [RadarOnline]...

This Is What Happens When Your Back Turns To Mush
This is a story about pain. If you've ever had it, maybe you'll feel compelled to read on. If you never have, I hope you never do....

Formerly Censored Dwarf Painting Restored To Full Nudity
This 16th century Italian masterpiece was finally restored to its original butt-nakedness, after having been painted over for being obscene. Oh, and it's a two-sided canvas, so there's a rear view too....

SportsCenter First Is A Milestone For Attractive, Well-Dressed Female Journalists
At noon today, two female SportsCenter anchors handed the baton off to two other women, a first in the show's long history. Truly this is a monumental day in the long struggle for women's rights....

I Hope You Die, Mr. Weatherman
Bit of a shorter funbag today. I had back surgery yesterday. Fuck off and leave me alone. Your letters:...

What The Fuck Are We Supposed To Do With Judah Friedlander?
Greetings, faceless demographic. So the folks at HarperCollins are trying to promote Judah Friedlander's book "How To Beat Up Anybody" and I'm having trouble trying to figure out how to promote it. It doesn't help that the publicist lady referred to the site as "Deadpin" several times....

The Day Jeremiah Pharms's Wife Attacked His New Girlfriend In The Stands
You might remember the brilliant, scary reporting about the 2000 Washington Huskies by the Seattle Times' Ken Armstrong and and Nick Perry in 2008. Now, all the stuff that couldn't make a family newspaper has been released in the book, "Scoreboard, Baby."...

Poonami: Brooklyn Canal Turns Into Literal River Of Human Shit
The Gowanus Canal, which has already tested positive for gonorrhea, ran brown with human waste after this month's tornado. It's like the eleventh plague of Egypt, only, you know, poop. [via Brownstoner]...

Lions Player Holds Up One More Finger Than His Team Has Wins
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

At Promoter's Request, Ines Sainz To Work Pacquiao Fight
Bayanihan Tayo! reports Ms. Ines Sainz will "work the microphone for the weigh-ins and other events concerning the [Pacquiao/Margarito] fight" at Top Rank's Bob Arum's behest....

Albert Haynesworth: I'm Not "A Slave Or Whatever" to Redskins
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Bud Selig Says He's Willing to Talk About Expanded Baseball Playoffs
It's not like letting more teams into the MLB playoffs is a brand-new idea, but the issue resurfaced before the Cardinals/Cubs game yesterday. Here's what Commissioner Bud Selig said about it:...

N.Y. Daily News Still Pissed At Flyers Fans Who Booed Grizzly Mom
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Will Someone Please Help Jose Canseco Get His Decorative Light Fixtures Back?
There is so much compressed sadness in this one tweet that I think we can now upgrade Jose Canseco from professional sad sack to existential hero. I mean, at this point would you be at all surprised if his next tweet were, "woke up from uneazy dreams now ima bug ,help"?...

GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE: The Saddest Hookup In the World
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Last Night's Winner: Felix Hernandez's Chances Of Not Getting Jobbed Out Of A Cy Young
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Felix Hernandez, who probably locked up his Cy Young last night along about the time the Rays hung their seventh run on CC Sabathia....

Leave Wayne Rooney Alone Now, Hints Sir Alex Ferguson
Kids, there is a big lesson here. Reach for the stars, by all means, but once there, don't mess it all up by prowling for threesomes when your glamourous wife isn't looking....

Dexter McCluster: Not Gangsta
Hmm. Well. Hmm. This is something. I think this public service announcement will only result in reminding me to drop McCluster from my fantasy team. [Pitch Weekly]...

The 1970s Oakland Raiders: Boozin' And Coozin' Through El Rancho
In "Badasses," author Peter Richmond chronicles the whiskey-drinking, horse-stealing, panty-poaching lunacy that surrounded John Madden's Oakland Raiders....

Dork Beats Other Dork: The King Of Kong Returns
The guy from The King of Kong is once again The King of Kong. Steve Wiebe retook the world-record from Billy Mitchell, and the wussiest rivalry in the world was given new life. Bring on the sequel. [Seattle Post-Intelligencer]...