x Page 891 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Poor Amanda Shit Her Pants While Passed Out In the Backseat
For many of you, the day after Thanksgiving requires you to put on your best Gap sport coat, head out to the local beef-and-beer drink your way through a high school reunion. Sometimes, the outcomes are disastrous. Heed these warnings....
What Objects Are We Putting In Our Rectums?
Let's have some more fun with the Sun-Sentinel's emergency room database, shall we? Here's a list of various objects that in various contexts were lodged in various rectums. Verbatim:...
Another Children's Treasury Of Bizarre Injuries
Last year, we brought you some highlights from the Sun-Sentinel's database of emergency room visits. They've updated it for the holidays, so we've picked it through for some of the stranger hospitalizations....
Heat Strokes, Games 12-14: The Deathly Hallows
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....
Real Madrid Two Get Sent Off On Purpose
This post, written by Josh Burt, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff....
Crazy NYC Corner Store Fight Is Crazy
NYC bodegas are always good for something. Take this ridiculous fight for example. Somebody owes somebody money, so somebody else throws some shit around, then: pandemonium....
Here's Video Of Carl Pelini Getting Handsy With A TexAgs.com Photographer
The controversy over Nebraska defensive coordinator Carl Pelini pushing TexAgs.com co-owner Brandon Jones after Saturday's game is reaching a fevered pitch. We covered this yesterday, but new video has surfaced that's pretty conclusive proof Pelini pushed Jones....
“Help! I Keep Dreaming About Banging My Mom!”
Hey, before we get to the letters, BRAD CHILDRESS WAS FIRED YESTERDAY! WOOHOO FUCK YEAH! SO LONG, CUNTGROPER! We're finally rid of you, YOU BALD ASSHOLE! Now my beloved Vikings can finally get around to drafting the wrong quarterback, losing key free agents, becoming as tightfisted as the Bills, and...
Three-And-A-Half Minutes Of Alex Ovechkin Dancing? Da!
It's no wonder the women are all over him. [via Russian Machine Never Breaks]...
Crazy Old Coots Still Bemoaning Felix Hernandez's Cy Young Award
Joe Morgan may be gone, but his ignorant spirit lives on. Murray Chass and Phil Rogers wonder how in the world Hernandez could be the best pitcher if he didn't have the most wins. Yes, we're still having this damn discussion....
Man Bijt Man: Luis Suarez Has A Mike Tyson Moment
If you thought Samuel Eto’o’s headbutt was the most ridiculous moment of severe misbehavior in soccer this weekend, you were wrong. Ajax’s Luis Suarez bitting PSV Eindhoven’s Otman Bakkal was far more bizarre....
Claude Giroux Scores Dong Goal For Flyers But Isn't Into Dong Talk
Here's Flyers color guy Steve "Coatesy" Coates chuckling at Claude Giroux's reticence to talk about where the puck hit him on a second-period tip-in goal last night. It's funny because it hit the dongal zone of his uniform pants....
Down Went Boxer Iran Barkley, And Down He Keeps Going
In better times, Iran "The Blade" Barkley was whooping Tommy Hearns, keeping 40 large in cash in his closet and spending his winnings on "a custom Mercedes, shiny jewelry and fur coats." These most certainly aren't better times....
Here's Video Of Rex Ryan Being Tickled Pink By A Fan Running On The Field
What, no Tasers? As with the Roethlisberger slam, watch it as long as the NFL online team allows you to. ...
Notre Dame Won't Talk About Woman Who Killed Herself After Reporting Football Player Sexually Assaulted Her
At the end of August, 19-year-old Elizabeth "Lizzy" Seeberg told [university] police that a Notre Dame football player sexually assaulted her. Nine days later, she killed herself. And what has the university said about it in the months since?...
Did Nebraska Defensive Coordinator Carl Pelini Rough Up A Texas A&M Photographer? (Updated With Video)
Texas A&M beat Nebraska 9-6 yesterday. Excitement. At least for Aggies fans, who stormed the field. And for an Aggie photographer, who claims Cornhusker D coordinator and the head coach's littler big bro Carl Pelini got all grabby, pushy, breaky with him....
Here's Video Of The Knockout Of The Year Getting Delivered In Atlantic City Last Night
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Van Damme Takes "Kickboxer" Sequel Pitch A Bit Too Literally
At a time when Steven Seagal has become an obese parody of himself on A&E, Jean-Claude Van Damme announces that he'll return to a kickboxing ring to evolve beyond a Hollywood life of drinking, "cocaine and all that shit."...
TJ Lavin Released From Hospital, Mother Says He'll Ride Again
Competitive rider/MTV host TJ Lavin was induced into a coma after being thrown from his bike, knocked unconscious and critically injured during a BMX event in Vegas last month. After a month in the hospital, he went home yesterday....
A Watched Bridge Never Implodes
A pair of Chicago morning show anchors eagerly wait for the demolition of a bridge...and wait...and wait some more. They come back to the studio for some chit-chat, only to completely miss the destruction. They proceed to freak right the fuck out....