Time To Deregulate The ESPY Awards

As self-fellating as the ESPY Awards has become lately, they do have entertainment value, and the concept of a sports awards show is a novel idea. Well, novel in the context of awards shows, not novel in the sense of "this beats a cure for cancer!" But why does it always have to be ESPN?

Imagine if we had "The Best Damn Sports Awards" every year. Or the "Versies." Gak. And what's the deal with having it tape delayed? That basically spoils the telecast. The New York Giants were named Best Team. Pow. You officially have no reason to watch until the end tonight. In fact, ESPN has already posted the winners. I don't recall David Chase publishing the plot points of The Sopranos finale. Or rather all but the final one.

If we could get some kind of sports awards show that rotated the four major networks, and filmed it live, it might be a more compelling watch. Not as compelling as, say, an actual sporting event, but at least the nation would get all of the awards fanfare, with none of the foresight, and Boston teams would still feel slighted when they don't win the major awards.

So get this. I've had a blast being your occasional weekend guy for the last year or so. Look for my live blogs on this very website in the future, and I can't wait to see the new weekend sextet take control. —Suss