Woody Paige Is More Serious Than You Think

You thought you knew Woody Paige. You thought he was the guy who ate dog food on the air. You thought he was the guy who threw temper tantrums because nobody invites his girlfriends to ESPN going-away parties. You thought he was the dope who wore stupid hats and called himself, inventively, "Professor Screw Loose."

Nope. That man you see is a serious journalist who has been captured by an actor. So says Paige in The South Bend Tribune:

"I've covered civil rights in the South, the aftermath of Martin Luther King's assassination, and the World Trade Center attack," Paige said. "I was a serious political writer. This is entertainment. This character I play, it's not me."

For the sake of argument, we did a little Nexis search on Paige's "serious political writing" about the attack on the World Trade Center. The day after the attacks, he started his column with a poem and talked about trying to reach his friends in New York. (Perhaps they were there covering it for him?) He arrived in New York over the weekend and wrote about drinking with shellshocked New Yorkers who, we assure you, were just lusting to talk about it to people who came buzzing into town. He was in Arizona a week later, covering the Broncos' win over The Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals.

But to give Paige the benefit of the doubt, we'll totally call out David Halberstam the next time he eats something disgusting on national television.

"Cold Pizza" tries taste of ND spirit [South Bend Tribune]