The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

The new ESPN oral history, Those Guys Have all the Fun, is now available in stores. We've been having some fun with the book in recent days. Mixed in with our usual sober analysis of satellite transponder rights and ESPN's dual-revenue-stream model, we've also brought you many tales of ESPN people screwing other ESPN people, in both senses of the word. What we've learned thus far:

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

Michelle Beadle watched the Erin Andrews peephole video | "I felt bad for her. She looked fabulous but it was such a violation. ... I think things might have been handled differently, but she seems to be moving on. Sometimes these things turn out better for people." READ »

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

Those guys have all the fur | "You hear about the 'Rug Races?' Well, [redacted] had this place near [redacted] and we used to go out there for meetings a couple times a year. There was a lot of drinking that went on there, a ton of drinking. [Redacted] and his buddies apparently called these hookers and in front of [redacted], he got them to lie naked on the floor on their backs with their legs spread ..." READ »

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

ESPN was basically Studio 54, give or take some disco music | "There was screwing in the hallways. Okay, maybe not in the hallways, but there were a couple of stairwell stories…. There were drugs in the building, that I knew." READ »

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

The decision about LeBron James's Decision was an orgy of self-interest, with Jim Gray on top | "I worked for this. I created this. I came up with the concept. Maverick Carter and Ari Emanuel are two of the most stand-up, honorable, loyal people I've been engaged with in television, in all my thirty-five years. When ESPN wanted to replace me and throw me under the bus, they stood firm and said, 'No, Jim Gray is with us.'" READ »

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

Bill Simmons is not "intimidatable" | "And I'm just sitting there with a big smile on my face, like, Oh, it's great that we finally met, and within five minutes I disarmed him, but [ESPN executive Norby Williamson] still had to go into the whole 'People here don't think you're a team player, you think the rules don't apply to you.' And I said, 'I'm actually kind of feeling like maybe they shouldn't to some degree.'" READ »

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

Also, Simmons seems to hate everything about ESPN | "Nothing against Bristol, but I do worry that it becomes a little cultish after a while. ... At the cafeteria, there's Mike and Mike getting a sandwich and there's Matthew Berry and, hey, there's Mark Schlereth." READ »

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

No one is having any of the fun — not ESPN, not the book's publisher, and not post-lobotomy Mike Tirico | The network is convening emergency meetings, and the book's publisher, Little, Brown, is sending out cease-and-desists. And here's what Mike Tirico says about all that unpleasantness: "Most of the people over time who have worked with me have enjoyed working with me. I hope they have. At least they said they have, and I hope they always will." READ »

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

Chris Berman blames Tony Kornheiser for "You're with me, Leather" | "In the mid-nineties, somebody said I was in a bar and used a pickup line on a woman wearing leather and she left with me. I really didn't know what they were talking about. But a colleague of mine, Mr. Kornheiser, chose to run with it, and the Internet chose to run with it for years. I don't even know what 'it' is, but it's a very dangerous thing, especially when a colleague piles on and gives credence to it." READ »
Also: Rick Chandler's "You're with me, leather" source resurfaces, swears it's all true

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

Berman is a sockpuppet and proud of it: "I'm a simple guy. I don't watch TV. I don't go on the Internet. So I never watched Playmakers, but I knew if the league was pissed, I probably should be pissed." READ »

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

Keith Olbermann once calculated that he deserved an 887 percent raise | "Based on the reported profits of the Today show and the salaries of its key figures, a fair ratio was to pay your talent a total figure of about 10 percent of their show's profits. Working off numbers I had gotten from a sales guy in the N.Y.C. office, I calculated that the correct salaries for Dan and me were about $2,750,000 a year. And a year and a half later, Fox offered me a contract for something like $2,813,000 a year. The top salary paid to anybody doing SportsCenter had been whatever I was getting, which I think topped out around $310,000 a year." READ »

The Deadspin Guide To The New ESPN Book

Dick Ebersol was pretty perceptive this one time | "ESPN basically has to have one of their talent talk about Hitler or put a picture of their dick on a phone — which is what that Salisbury guy did — before they'll do anything about any of these various crazies, because they don't have to. Nobody can touch them." READ »