NFL Page 1298 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Bears Upset Packers, Their Quarterback Sort Of Helped
A cursory look at the 1 o'clock games led one to make a face comparable to sniffing a plate of expired deli meat. But sometimes expired meat is salvageable, which led to the creation of the hot dog. Similarly, this bundle of games gave us a couple of surprises....
Kevin Everett Picked The Wrong Game To Attend
For as much as he's been through this year, injured Bills tight end Kevin Everett has to be all confused why the Giants aren't exactly collapsing according to plan this late in the season....
Tony Romo Distracted By Watching Marion Barber Run Through Linebackers
I'm sure everyone involved in the Dallas Cowboys organization would love to get home to their families by Sol Invictus, but they all have some unfinished business even after beating the Carolina Panthers 20-13 last night....
Jessica Simpson Won't Be In Romo's Head, More Like Against It
It might seem a skosh ridiculous that Carolina Panthers fans are going balls out on this Jessica Simpson cutout distraction thingy tonight against Tony Romo and the Dallas Cowboys, considering that Terrell Owens has said repeatedly that Simpson really isn't a distraction to the team after all. So th...
Najeh Davenport New Dump Truck For Steelers
The Steelers might have won last night — a loss would have been devastating to their hopes f staving off the Browns — but they lost running back Willie Parker for the rest of the year with a broken leg. (Good thing nobody plays fantasy football in Week 17.) And now only one man can save them: The Ha...
The Rams Can Cure What Ails Ya
The Steelers wouldn't actually blow this thing, would they? The team with the handsome coach and the gay mascot have looked awful the last few weeks, and now the Browns are threatening to pass them. But they wouldn't fall so far to lose to the Rams, right? Right?...
Hey, Man, Get Off The Danged Roof!
After their loss to previously winless Miami on Sunday, Ravens fans need all the entertainment they can get. Fortunately, some beautiful idiot is refusing to get off the roof of a local bar until the Ravens win a game. That should go well....
The Dolphins Climb Out Of The Hole
We have made no secret of our enduring love of The Dugout, both in its original incarnation and its current, non-expletive form at AOL Sports. But you think these guys just know baseball? Pshaw....
This Week In The SSW
For years — OK, a couple of days — Slate writer Robert Weintraub has been tinkering with a concept called The SSW, short for "The Sean Salisbury Wisdom," which tracks the consensus of the football punditocracy to ensure those triumphant declarations from Friday aren't flushed down the memory hole on...
Purple Jesus And His Pop Warner Buddies
Far be it from us to impugn the reputation of a team that has won five in a row and looks, on paper, to be one of the hottest teams in the NFL, but ... heavens to Betsy, if that's what a playoff team looks like, sheesh, when's baseball season?...
We Still Have Faith
Don't worry, Kyle: You're always a winner in our book....
It's Purple Jesus Vs. The Neckbeard
Yes, yes, tonight's "Monday Night Football" game is somewhat key to deciding that last playoff slot in the NFC, and it's nice to have an MNF game mean something. But who cares about Purple Jesus and the Vikings. It's Kyle Orton's night to shine!...
Joe Buck Verbally Gropes Jessica Simpson. Eww.
The one question that needed to be asked and wasn't: What's the worse fashion mistake: Simpson's pink No. 9, or Laura Quinn's half jersey? Please vote now....
The NFL From The Ice Planet Hoth
The Mighty MJD's Smorgasbord runs every Monday. Do enjoy....
The Day Your Fantasy League Went Nuts
Just about any fantasy team that's had any sort of success this season has had either Tony Romo or Tom Brady as their quarterback. Both have had outstanding seasons that few expected; in our own league, one guy has Brady and Randy Moss. He has been dominating all season. Until yesterday....
Dolphins Win! HOLY COW The Dolphins Win!
Notes and info smidgens from Week 14 in the NFL. ......
Fins Win! Fins Win! Fins Win!
Well, we said the Dolphins had to beat the Ravens to avoid the ol' schneid season, and gosh golly gee dang it, they somehow pulled it off! In overtime! Shortly after Baltimore missed a 44-yard field goal, Greg Camarillo caught a short pass over the middle and busted off the 64-yard winner. Final sco...
Setting The Tiny Four O'clock Football Table
Philadelphia at Dallas, FOX: This will be the fourth time Terrell Owens faces the Eagles since his nasty exit from Philly in '05. He had 10 catches for 174 yards and a TD in Dallas' 38-17 win over the Eagles back in early November?. So why'd I use a Romo photo instead of a T.O. one? I have no idea. ...
Where The Offense Is, Let The Great Axe Fall
New Jersey at New England, CBS: In case you've never seen that one television completely dedicated to sports, the Patriots have already locked up a first-round bye but will have revenge on their mind with Mangini's blowing-whistle Jets coming to town. And personally, I want to see heads fucking role...