• Osama bin Laden, the "most wanted face of terrorism," is dead. Because you're probably not reading Deadspin for news on his capture and death, we'll just say that what this means for you is that college kids are acting extremely college-y, and that it allegedly puts a new pressure on the NFL and the players union to end the lockout in time for a commemorative game on September 11, the tenth anniversary of the 9/11 attacks.
• Even if sports seem kinda insignificant now, blah blah blah Mets, we're in the second round of the NBA playoffs. The Grizzlies easily defeated the Thunder, 114-10. Memphis dominated OKC in the post with what I guess might be considered a finesse big-man game: "We don't just throw the ball in there and try to bang, bang," Marc Gasol told reporters. Are you implying that Kendrick Perkins doesn't know finesse?
• Miami beat Boston, 99-90, and Paul Pierce was ejected for a "verbal taunt" directed at Dywane Wade. Wade said after the game that, much like decision-makers who make decisions, the Heat's "shot-makers made shots." So that's how it's done.
• There's also reportedly still hockey going on! The Sharks are up 2-0 over Detroit after Sunday's 2-1 win, and the Lightning lead 2-0 after last night's 3-2 overtime win against the Caps. Here's video of Vincent Lecavalier's game-winning goal.
• Rex Ryan, author, is doing a really good job of stirring shit in the never-ending off-season.
• If Larry Legend left Indiana, would the state still exist?
• Sacramento, on what happens to be the worst day to announce significant news ever, will reveal today whether or not the Kings will stay or move to Anaheim next season. We recommend you do not wait another minute to pick up your velour Kings jacket, because it will be awesome either way.
Tom Thibodeau, former head coach at Salem State, is the NBA's coach of the year. Now he, too, can emulate Red Auerbach sitting on a bench.
Here's Carl Pavano becoming one with bat and pine.
A few stories you might've missed this weekend.
Stealing From Children: A bearded man stole a foul ball from a young baseball fan at Sunday's A's game..