Soccer Page 238 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

FIFA Orders World Cup Qualifier To Be Replayed After Referee Banned For Life
Last November, South Africa beat Senegal 2-1 in a World Cup qualifying match, their only win through four qualifying games. However, a few months after the game, Joseph Lamptey, the referee in charge, was found guilty of “unlawfully influencing match results” and was subsequently banned for life. He...

The USMNT Doesn't Deserve To Qualify For The World Cup
For the majority of casual fans, international soccer is a game of tournaments. Outside of high-profile friendlies or marquee qualifying matches, this sort of ephemeral casual fandom more or less hibernates between the big tournaments, the beginnings of which reawaken rabid patriotism and communal p...

Costa Rica And Mexico Draw After Gorgeous Marco Ureña Golazo
Costa Rica got their only goal of the night in tonight’s World Cup qualifying match against Mexico from Marco Ureña, who tied things up with this laser into the corner of the net:...

Uruguay Probably Through To The World Cup On Two Goofy Goals
Fede Valverde, the 19-year-old Real Madrid prospect who is not racist, just made an enormous impact with what Ray Hudson dubbed a “wicked deflection” in his debut match for Uruguay. The young midfielder got lucky in the 76th minute, scoring a long-range goal that bounced through the defense and beca...

USMNT Lose 1-1
The USMNT avoided disaster in the most depressing way possible today against Honduras, riding a late short-range tap-in from Bobby Wood off a screaming Kellyn Acosta free kick to draw Honduras, 1-1. The score flatters the U.S., who gave their second consecutive pitiful performance and are lucky to r...

Willian's Volleyed Banger Puts Brazil Up On Colombia
Brazil and Colombia are playing right now in what will hopefully be tonight’s only competitive World Cup qualifying match, and Willian—owner of the sporting world’s best afro since Randy Moss’s—thumped the snot out of the ball en route to scoring this beauty:...

Slavery-Supporting Nation's Propaganda Arm Buys Kylian Mbappé In Super Shady Transfer
Qatar is a loathsome county built on corruption, a labor system that closely resembles slavery, and the support of the murder of innocent people through the financial backing of terrorists. Qatar is also the owner of French club Paris Saint-Germain, the country’s luxurious and extravagantly gilded s...

Former USMNT "Savior" Julian Green Sent Away To A Last-Place Club With No Manager
Faster than you can say “Freddy Adu,” Julian Green is on the move again....

Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain Flees Sinking Ship For Liverpool
There had to be a point during Liverpool’s curb-stomping of Arsenal this past weekend when a few Gunners thought to themselves I’ve got to get the hell out of here. After being announced as Liverpool’s newest signing today, Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain became the first to make good on that sentiment. He ...

Just What In The Goddamn Hell Are Barcelona Doing In The Transfer Market?
Death, taxes, and Barcelona doing some fuck shit in the summer 2017 transfer window. These are the three constants in life, and boy does that last one keep reminding us of its omnipresence....

Overconfident Goalkeeper Pays For His Casualness With Huge Boner
Ross County’s Scott Fox must’ve thought Rangers forward Alfredo Morelos had slid off the edge of the flat Earth after the keeper managed to juke away from Morelos’s tackle deep in Fox’s own penalty area. Unfortunately, the Earth is not flat—or at least the edge of it is not located just off the boun...

This Already Scary Liverpool Team Is Getting Even Better
Liverpool have spent the last generation in a strange state, a sort of high-end irrelevance. They’ve remained, for all but the topmost tier of players, a destination club—one with plentiful resources, a winning tradition, and one of the strongest fan bases in world soccer. The problem, though, is th...

Arsenal Are Who We Thought They Were
Already at this early stage of the season, is there anyone who still thinks Arsenal’s decision to bring back Arsène Wenger was a good idea?...

Andrea Belotti Scored The Goal Of The Weekend
As the summer transfer window wanes and clubs are stressing over Ousmane Dembélé, Philippe Coutinho, Kylian Mbappé, Neymar, and other flashy strikers making (or not making) big moves around Europe, Torino’s 23-year-old big shot Andrea Belotti is over in Italy cooking up a storm. He’s long been linke...

In Ousmane Dembélé, Barcelona Have Found A New Heir For Lionel Messi
At long last, some good news for FC Barcelona. Both Barça and Borussia Dortmund have now officially announced their agreement to send budding French superstar Ousmane Dembélé to Spain for a staggering fee that could reach as high as €145 million. And as far as news for Barça fans goes, this really c...

Live-Tweeting Of Soccer Match Interrupted When Social Media Manager Subbed Into Game
We’ve seen before just how versatile lower league soccer players have to be in order to keep their clubs functioning and their fans informed. Just this weekend, we saw another example when a Baldock Town player continued in the proud tradition of Sleaford Town’s Harrison Allen by dutifully tweeting ...

Gylfi Sigurdsson Drops In A Goal From The Heavens
Oh man, this is some way to introduce yourself to your new fans. In only his second appearance for Everton, Gylfi Sigurdsson has just scored this insane blast from the middle of the park against Hajduk Split in a Europa League qualifying match:...

English Soccer Club Investigating Claims Women Had To Show Their Bras To Enter Stadium
League Two English soccer club Stevenage FC said earlier this week they are investigating allegations that women were “asked to lift their tops up to show their bras to female stewards upon entry to The Lamex Stadium.” ...

Here's The Champions League Group Stage Draw
With the final teams determined yesterday in the play-in round, UEFA wasted no time picking the matchups for the true beginning of the Champions League....

Zlatan Ibrahimovic Back At Manchester United
When Zlatan Ibrahimovic suffered a nasty-looking season-ending knee injury in April, and Manchester United declined to extend his contract in June, it seemed like it was finally time for the 35-year-old star to make his long-rumored move to MLS. LA Galaxy? New York Red Bulls? Nope....