Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise
Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

Someone Finally Posterized Jarrett Allen, And It Was Marquese Chriss

Tonight is apparently a good night for bouncy young dudes on horrendous Eastern Conference cellar-dwellers to rise up and violently jam on someone whose season hasn’t already ended. First we had Kevin Knox posterizing the hell out of Ben Simmons, and now we’ve got Marquese Chriss of the Cavaliers thundering home a massive tomahawk slam right in the mug of Brooklyn’s Jarrett Allen:

This isn’t supposed to happen to Jarrett Allen! This is the man who turned Blake Griffin into dog food, and calmly stoned LeBron James at the rim, and punched away a James Harden dunk, and, in a truly insane feat, even denied Giannis Antetokounmpo on a driving dunk attempt. Earlier in this very game he stuffed Colin Sexton’s weak shit right back in his face like it was no big deal. Look at this shit:


It’s sort of anticlimactic that the guy who finally posterized him is Marquese Chriss, but Chriss is a serious dunker, and dunking is almost certainly his only true NBA-grade skill. The poor guy has had an especially frustrating season. He was traded to the Rockets, but fell out of the rotation despite Houston resorting to the likes of Danuel House to fill rotation minutes during an injury-plagued first half of the season. Chriss finally requested a trade, but within hours of making his request Rich Paul announced Anthony Davis’s earth-shattering trade request in New Orleans—if the timing didn’t wipe Chriss’s request completely off the NBA map, it certainly made it look awfully silly by comparison.

For his efforts, ahead of the deadline Chriss was traded to the Cleveland Cavaliers, about as hopeless a destination as there is in today’s NBA. And then Monday night he was rudely obliterated by, of all people, Mario Hezonja. Awful. But it’s nice to see he’s channelling the frustration in a positive direction!

Staff Writer, Deadspin

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